World

Comrade Starmer Appoints New Big State Tsar to Fix Big State

GRIMSBY - England - Comrade Starmer has appointed a new Big State tsar to fix the Big State with a New Big State department.

Comrades, commissars, Labour Party hierarchy, Bolsheviks, apparatchiks, Big State civil servants, train drivers, Marxist union bosses, NHS managers, and the rest of the scum proletariat. Comrade Starmer has vowed to address the intermittent problem of the People’s Republic of Soviet Britain’s Big State perceived problem by increasing the size, bureaucracy, pensions, and salaries of all Big State departments and apparatchik civil servants working within the Big State.

URGENT COMMUNIQUÉ FROM COMRADE STARMER

In this respect, Comrade Starmer has appointed a new Big State tsar to oversee an entire new department to oversee the implementation of further Big State special operations within the Big State.

THE BIG STATE, BIG STATE DEPARTMENT OF BIG STATE EFFICIENCY

Commissar Augustine Bloate will oversee the new Big State commissary and has already drawn up plans for a mélange of committees within committees and heavily taxpayer funded quangos to create thousands more regulations and policies to regulate the Big State with more Big State regulatory apparatus.

Speaking from his dacha in Grimsby, Comrade Starmer was confident that the Big State would be cut down to size by expanding the size of the Big State.

“I have just enjoyed a prolonged banya, comrades, and am fresh and revitalised. This list here is a small step in increasing the efficiency of the Big State by adding a further Big State department to increase efficiency and to implement a ‘fix Big State mechanism’ of Big State expansion. Commissar Augustine Bloate, who will oversee the new Big State department, has assured me that he will do his best to normalise the situation at hand by increasing the size of the Big State even further. Thank you comrades. I will now get back to my champagne and caviar soup.”

INGSOC NOTICE 442900-039972-34393830110983839291119283838292920-4

JOHNSON MCREGOR, 15, OF 21 GORDOBROON STREET, GLASGOW, SECTOR 101, SCOTLAND, WAS TODAY AWARDED 12.8 GRAMS OF EXTRA BUTTER RATIONS FOR REPORTING HIS MOTHER, FATHER, SISTER, BROTHER, AUNTIE AND DOG FOR TUTTING DISAPPROVINGLY DURING A BROADCAST FROM COMRADE STARMER ABOUT THE BIG STATE INCREASE IN ALL BIG STATE TAXES FOR PROLES TO BE ENACTED NEXT WEEK BY THE NEWLY FORMED BIG STATE BIG STATE DEPARTMENT OF BIG STATE EFFICIENCY. THE TREACHEROUS TRAITORS TO THE BIG STATE WERE TAKEN AWAY THIS MORNING AT 3AM. THEY WILL BE LIQUIDATED AND RECYCLED FOR NET ZERO! REMEMBER COMRADES, LOOK, LISTEN, REPORT!

Help Support Independent Publishers

PLEASE SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB We fight for freedom, justice and coffee.
Disqus Comments Loading...
Share

Recent Posts

Celebrity Couple ‘ARE dating’ and ‘have been together for ‘over a year’

HOLLYWOOD - USA - A celebrity couple are dating and have been together for over…

5 hours ago

Commissar Reeves Announces Great News About the Shrinking UK Economy

SCUNTHORPE - England - The shrinking UK economy thanks to Commissar Reeves is now lower…

9 hours ago

Experts: The Globe is Entering a New Trump Renaissance

WASHINGTON D.C. - USA - According to experts at a prominent think tank, the globe…

9 hours ago

Trump: “Don’t call me a flip-flopper. I don’t wear flip-flops!”

WASHINGTON D.C. - USA - The Donald has denied he is a flip-flopper or wears…

11 hours ago

Why Illegal Immigrants and Asylum Seekers From Third World Are Mainly Men

DOVER - England - Why are the majority of illegal immigrants and asylum seekers single…

1 day ago

Russian Roulette: Trump Threatens to Call Putin Silly Names if No Ukraine Ceasefire

WASHINGTON D.C. - USA - President Trump has threatened Vladimir Putin with a volley of…

2 days ago

This website uses cookies.