17.7 C
London
Thursday, December 12, 2024
secret satire society
HomeWorldDonald Trump's Lewinsky Moment - Laura Loomer?

Donald Trump’s Lewinsky Moment – Laura Loomer?

WASHINGTON D.C. - USA - Is Donald Trump having a Bill Clinton, Lewinsky moment? The evidence is dripping off from every source.

She certainly ain’t no shiksa, just like Lewinsky she’s a good down to earth 31-year-old Jewish Princess, albeit with a stretched out face that would even scare the late Joan Rivers. She slept her way to the top, and now she’s the new star of the Donald Trump line-up. So, why is The Don infatuated by Laura Loomer?

The Donald even takes her on his presidential aircraft, where she no doubt cleans out his pipes before landing for another rally at some Midwest no man’s land shithole.

Laura seems like the kinda gal that could make a seventy-year-old limp dude stand to attention with no problems, and her technical skills whilst performing must be exemplary. Teasing with her flicking devil’s tongue she has allegedly perfected that certain look she gives her mark whilst on her knees, and she certainly adores Trump by taking the whole load, or what’s left at that age, all over her pale hockey mask stretched out face. Who wouldn’t like a girl who delights in slapping it playfully over her puckered botox trout lips, paying special attention to your old man dangling sack hanging halfway down your fucking knees? Sometimes it is a little rushed, because the campaign manager needs to ask about the next rally or something and may walk in at any moment, but mostly there is no rush. I mean, it’s not like The Don is paying by the hour here, which is the feeling he gets with his useless credit card swilling trophy wife who, like Hillary, turns a blind eye to the indiscretions of her man.

If Bill Clinton could do it for years with an intern, why not Trump? They were both guests at some infamous island or something where lots of funny stuff happened, but hey, that’s all in the past. This is now 2024, and things have changed somewhat, or maybe they haven’t.

The only thing Loomer needs now is a blue dress…as for Trump, he’s having a heck of a wild time right now.

 

 

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"

2 COMMENTS

Comments are closed.

- Advertisment -

NEWS ON THE HOUR

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!