Astronomers have warned that an imaginary £22 billion black hole that does not exist could suck up the entire Labour Party.
“Our predictions and calculation suggest that this £22 billion black hole which only exists in the deranged minds of Chancellor Rachel Reeves and Labour prime minister Keir Starmer will emerge from the exact location of the Number 10 Downing Street downstairs toilet and engulf the entire Labour hierarchy in one fell swoop. We must not underestimate the gravity of this situation as well as the gravity of the black hole, that doesn’t actually exist in this dimension or any other dimension,” Professor Patrick McMangell of the Cambridge University observatory revealed today.
According to the astronomers tracking the non-existent black hole which is being used as an excuse to give huge pay rises to Marxist union officials, train drivers and doctors, the gravitational pull exerted on members of the Labour government will be so strong that they will be pulled inside out from their anuses outwards.
“Yes, that is correct, it will be quite fascinating to see these people being pulled inside out, but that’s black holes for you, mess with an imaginary £22 billion black hole, and you get a serious dose of inside out,” the professor added.
INFO: What is a black hole?
A black hole is a very dark ominous thing that is frankly very dark because it exists in space which is also black, therefore seeing a black hole is quite hard with the naked eye because it is as dark and black as space itself and that’s why it’s called a black hole you silly person.
