World

Sunak Pulls a Pint of Pure Tax

YORKSHIRE - England - Unelected PM, Rishi Sunak attended a beer festival on the day he increased tax on alcohol to even more insane levels.

"Hand over all of your money for this heavily taxed pint, and don't forget to vote Tory at the next election"

“That will be £18.56 please,” a jubilant Rishi Sunak, the unelected autocrat who is the current shoo in Tory PM, said as he pulled a pint for a reporter at a beer festival where he was viciously heckled by attendees.

Increasing tax on everything, including the price of a pint is considered a good election winning tactic by the current socialist Tory remainers, but for everyone else in the country, it is going to be a sure-fire Labour winner.

“Imagine buying a round of drinks for your mates at your local. I can’t afford £20 for a pint because the Tories are taxing everything to death, let alone a round of drinks,” one pub dweller revealed.

The Tory tax hikes could possibly be the final round on pubs as a whole as customers desert them and opt for other avenues to sate their alcohol needs.

“I am making my own beer and gin at home now. It’s the only way I can afford to have a drink,” another former pub goer revealed.

The clueless Tories are thus cruising blindly and casually for a solid beating at the coming General Election, but the thing is these people are not Tories anymore, they are something completely different, and this is why many former Tory voters are abandoning the party in droves. The only other reasonable explanation for this madness is that the Tories are actively working to lose the election on purpose.

Take your heavily taxed pint Sunak and shove it up your fucking arse. If you can’t see you have lost already, you are not only completely deluded but blind as a bat.