Meghan Seen Off the Coast of Jamaica in Submarine

TRENCH TOWN - Jamaica - Meghan Markle, has been spotted in a submarine in hot pursuit of the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge during their Caribbean royal tour.

WAG WAAN! After Meghan’s attempt to thwart the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge’s visit to Belize in a helicopter, she has now hired a submarine from the Medellín Cartel to mess with the royal trip to Jamaica.

“Jamaica mistake wit’ dat monn? Mi don’ si nah sub-marine in di ocean! Mi gat mor cheance si Haile Salacee! Go down deh!” a Rasta said on the beach, squinting his eyes through his dreads.

Torpedo Alert

Rumours have been flying all across the island that Meghan is planning a campaign to highlight to the natives that the visiting royals are directly descended from slave traders.

“Bumba Clot! Is dat da truff? Small up yuhself! Weh yuh ah seh? Dis Meghan mebbe criss ting but mi susspec she ginnal,” another man on the beach revealed before climbing a tree to get a coconut.

The Jamaican navy has been put on full alert and if they see the submarine have vowed to sink it.

Rear Admiral Sly “Rude Boy” Marvin said his vessel was on permanent standby.

“Yah Sir! di yardie navy a pan standby yah now. Wi a gwine sink Meghan’s submarine an save di Cambridge’s fram more humiliations. Fi mi mon can row di boat real faas!”

Currently, the Cambridge’s are in Trench Town. The royal couple were mobbed by huge crowds of well-wishers desperate to shake their hands and share high-fives as they visited Bob Marley’s former home.

Help Support Independent Publishers

PLEASE SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB We fight for freedom, justice and coffee.
Disqus Comments Loading...
Share
Published by

Recent Posts

“When yo kids hungry jus’ take ’em to da sto!”

ATLANTA - USA - We're getting some sage advice from denizens of the African American…

1 day ago

Celebrity Couple ‘ARE dating’ and ‘have been together for ‘over a year’

HOLLYWOOD - USA - A celebrity couple are dating and have been together for over…

2 days ago

Commissar Reeves Announces Great News About the Shrinking UK Economy

SCUNTHORPE - England - The shrinking UK economy thanks to Commissar Reeves is now lower…

2 days ago

Experts: The Globe is Entering a New Trump Renaissance

WASHINGTON D.C. - USA - According to experts at a prominent think tank, the globe…

2 days ago

Trump: “Don’t call me a flip-flopper. I don’t wear flip-flops!”

WASHINGTON D.C. - USA - The Donald has denied he is a flip-flopper or wears…

3 days ago

Comrade Starmer Appoints New Big State Tsar to Fix Big State

GRIMSBY - England - Comrade Starmer has appointed a new Big State tsar to fix…

3 days ago

This website uses cookies.