Illegal Immigrants Caught Sending Illegal Text Messages With Illegal Words Illegally

LONDON - England - Illegal immigrants were today caught sending illegal text messages with illegal words in the illegal messages, the government has revealed.

The illegal messages by the illegal immigrants were immediately captured by a special illegal immigrant text message scheme set up by the government to combat anything to do with illegal immigration.

“Illegal immigrants are not sending illegal text messages in a legal fashion. We have put into place legal safeguards so that illegal communications by the illegal immigrants can legally stop the illegal activity of these illegal immigrants,” Vaszlo Zbwziwzazwd, former illegal immigrant and now head of the Illegal Immigration Text Squad told the Daily Telegraph.

In other news, an illegal immigrant was caught illegally buying a mars bar illegally from a legal shop today. He was legally arrested for illegally contributing to the legal economy.

Do you value freedom?

SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB We fight for freedom, justice, satire and coffee. DUE TO THE NATURE OF OUR JUVENALIAN SATIRE, AND CENSORSHIP WE CAN ONLY SURVIVE BY DONATIONS. PLEASE CONSIDER DONATING. THANK YOU. Biden Censorship | Starmer Censorship | Google Censorship
Disqus Comments Loading...
Share
Published by
Tags: uk

Recent Posts

‘Open Borders’ Green Party Leader Wants More Diversity in Cottaging Industry

HACKNEY - England - The 'open borders' Green Party leader is fed up with the…

14 hours ago

The Daily Squib Sold Out!

LONDON - England - The Daily Squib Anthology has sold out!

20 hours ago

“Comrades! It’s Working! Heavy Taxation Contracted the Economy by 0.1%”

LONDON - England - Commissar Rachel Reeves has praised her heavy taxation policies, which have…

2 days ago

Prepare For War With Russia While EU Funds Russia by Buying Their Oil and Gas

BRUSSELS - Belgium - Mark Rutte, the NATO chief, said today that Europe must prepare…

2 days ago

Stop Crying Brexit Never Happened Anyway

LONDON - England - People are crying that Labour are cosying up to the EU…

3 days ago

Argentina: “We want British weapons so we can invade Falkland Isles again!”

BUENOS AIRES - Argentina - Get ready for another Falkland Isles invasion, but this time…

3 days ago

This website uses cookies.