Americans Taking FEMA Camp Holidays This Summer

ALABAMA - USA - Increasing amounts of Americans are now taking FEMA camp holidays for their summer vacations.

“It’s great, we get one hot bowl of green mush a day and we get to talk to lots of similar holiday makers whilst the guards whip us in the holding cells. We don’t want to leave because the alternative is much worse,” Jon Vechter, a father of four on holiday with his family at Alabama’s premier 4 star FEMA camp revealed.

Camp activities include sitting down, standing and trying to look over the barbed wire fences around the camp. A four week stay at camp FEMA is a breeze at only $20 per person and the forced labour is only an extra $5 surcharge.

Camp commander, Miles Obuhmer, said: “Most Americans are starving and without jobs, so this is a great way for them to hang loose and relax. You get one hot meal a day and some stale bread for dinner, Obamacare is free here so you know you’ll be taken care of by the one doctor serving the whole camp of 45,000 holidaymakers. We wake them at dawn for rock breaking and tilling the dirt. Some liked it so much that we let them stay indefinitely, under the ground.”

FEMA Camp stays have a long waiting list so be sure to book your stay in advance as places are unlimited.

Daily Squib Book

DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"