Brits Abroad Stabbing Holidays All the Rage This Summer

MARMARIS - Turkey - There's nothing like a good stabbing frenzy on holiday. Brits are flocking to the Mediterranean this summer to agitate the locals and get a good stabbing, says the Home Office.

“It’s wonderful, you go and try and kiss a Kurdish girl and the whole family comes after you with knives. Does wonders for your fitness levels I tell you,” Graham Lout, 21, said from his Turkish hospital bed after getting stabbed over twenty times and surviving.

It’s not only the tribal Kurds in Turkey who are stab happy, but the Cretans are getting into the act as well.

“We see a Brit on holiday getting their bits out and fondling our women, drunk off their trolleys, pissing all over the place; well then its stabbing time for them,” Nicos Kotsoulis, 26, from Crete said from his prison cell.

Looks like it’s not just egg and chips Brits want, coming home to Blighty nursing a few slash wounds is a great talking point down the pub and the Daily Mail.

Help Support Independent Publishers

SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB We fight for freedom, justice and coffee.
Disqus Comments Loading...
Share
Published by
Tags: uk

Recent Posts

Meghan Markle Enterprises Warns Royal Family NOT to Strip the Titles

MONTECITO - USA - The Meghan Markle commercial enterprise making millions of dollars by using…

5 hours ago

Trump Planning to Put Tariffs on the Moon

WASHINGTON D.C. - USA - President Donald Trump announced on Tuesday that he is going…

9 hours ago

Fake Asylum Seeker Says He Wants to be the Next Gary Barlow

HULL - England - A fake asylum seeker who just came over the English Channel…

14 hours ago

Last Week to Submit Your Hackathon Proposal – TechX25 Hackathon8!

VALENCIA - Spain - Now is the time to register for the TechX25 Hackathon 8.

1 day ago

We Review Some of the Thousands of Kurdish Barber Shops on the High Street

CROYDON - England - Many UK cities are full to the brim of Kurdish barber…

2 days ago

If You Can Abort Babies, Why Not Adults?

MARYLAND - USA - A prominent member of the Institute of Population has put forward…

4 days ago

This website uses cookies.