17.7 C
London
Saturday, November 23, 2024
secret satire society
HomeWorldBrexit Punishment: Dictator Macron Shuts Off Freight to Britain

Brexit Punishment: Dictator Macron Shuts Off Freight to Britain

CALAIS - France - As French dictator Macron cuts off vital food and medicine supplies to Britain, it is all too obvious that this is a Brexit warning using the pretence of Covid.

“Let zis be a lesson to le Rosbifs! No more salad pour vous, or fromage or vin! If you do not give us full fishing rights in your waters and the ability to rule over Britain for decades further, we cut off your supplies! You can go back to eating boiled potatoes, boiled cabbage and gammon! Like the old days eh! Oh, excuse moi, zis is about the new strain of coronavirus, zis is why we cut off freight..heh, hehe, heh!” Dictator Macron of France, of the EU, shouted on Monday.

According to the EU, cutting off vital freight carrying food and medicine to the UK is justified because the EU are a bunch of vindictive bullies who hate losing.

“Amongst the daily idiotic demands we keep slapping into the so-called negotiations, we want all your fish, we want the ability to dictate what laws you can make in Britain, and we fart in the general direction of your ‘sovereignty’ you fucking Britisher swine!” an unelected EU Commission bureaucrat said, before drunkenly lowering his trousers and farting.

What next doodlebugs?

Will the EU resort to U-boats and doodlebugs to destroy the British spirit of Brexit freedom and cut off our food supply? With the loony tinpot dictators assembled in the EU, us Brits wouldn’t put it past them.

As for Dictator Macron, he was last seen goose-stepping around Calais looking through his telescope at the Cliffs of Dover.

“I veeell make you bend to my will! You will succumb to my bully tactics you English cochons! Soon you will be eating cabbage soup for Christmas! Oui, while we will be dining on exquisite roast meats and champagne! Bwah ha hah hah ha!”

To think, we once saved these people in World War II. How time and gratitude sometimes do not mix well, especially with the egotistical dictators of the world.

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
- Advertisment -

NEWS ON THE HOUR

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!