Ken Livingstone Applies to Become Mayor of Cayman Islands

GEORGE TOWN - Cayman Islands - Former London Mayor, Ken Livingstone, is ditching his bid to become London Mayor for a second time and is now focusing on the Caymans tax haven, instead.

“I know this place very well. I have a few accounts here where I siphon the money so I do not have to pay tax in the UK,” Mr Livingstone said on Tuesday.

The former mayor wants the Cayman Islands’ capital to be just like London, and is even proposing a congestion charging zone, where all vehicles will be charged $15 a day to pass through the city.

Man of the People

Mr Livingstone told the George Town Times newspaper: “I visit here quite a lot to check on my accounts and chat with my banker friends, and I have noticed that there aren’t many buses here. This is why I propose ordering in hundreds of those awful bendy buses that will clog up intersections, and take up all the room on the roads as well as pumping out all that lovely black smoke. Soon this place is going to be just like London, and as mayor, I will give my staff regular taxpayer funded trips to China to see how my red friends are doing. At a cost of $850,000 per trip, I am sure you will agree it will be well worth it.”

At least this way, Mr Livingstone’s ample salary and media takings will not have far to travel, and he will be sure to avoid the UK’s tax collectors.

Daily Squib Book

DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
Disqus Comments Loading...
Share
Published by

Recent Posts

The Public Sacrifice of Trump and the Dawn of a New Age of Women

WASHINGTON DC - USA - The dawn of a new age of women calls for…

19 hours ago

Why Labour is Killing Off Aspiration, Entrepreneurs and Deterring Foreign Investors

LONDON - England - We provide the reasons why the Labour Party is killing off…

20 hours ago

It’s Over For Trump: The Swamp Preparing to Release Kamala

WASHINGTON DC - USA - The Swamp is preparing to unleash Kamala Harris fully on…

2 days ago

Tories Choose Non-Hardline Diversity Candidate Kemi Badenoch as Next Leader

LONDON - England - The Tories have chosen Kemi Badenoch as their new leader.

3 days ago

The Dekulakization of British Farms is Underway

THE COUNTRYSIDE - England - Say goodbye to British farms as Labour conducts a policy…

3 days ago

Early Votes Indicate Kamala Harris Will Win Election

WASHINGTON DC - USA - Kamala Harris is well ahead with early ballots counted, and…

4 days ago

This website uses cookies.