Religious Cult Member Could Be Next President of the United States

UTAH - USA - One day, Americans could wake up with a member from a religious cult as their president, constitutional experts have warned.

These are very dangerous times for Americans. They’ve got the choice of voting for a spendthrift socialist stroke Marxist or a crazed, out of touch, right wing religious cult member, who has little or no understanding about the real world. Obama and Mitt Romney are a recipe for destruction that even Al Qaeda could not wish for more. America is in vast danger and with those candidates, it is a lose lose situation.

“In the U.S Army we call this situation, a ‘cluster f*ck’ because which ever way you go, there ain’t a good outcome. The people have been dealt some bad cards with these electoral candidates, and my guess is, sooner or later, whichever one wins the election will precipitate internal conflict not seen since 1775,” General Dean Patton told the Washington Times.

Mitt Romney, who is set to be the Republican candidate for the 2012 elections is a prominent member of the Mormon church cult which is a sinister sect of Christianity started by an American man who claimed he was having visions of an angel called Moroni in 1823, when in reality he was probably having a schizophrenic illness induced hallucination.

“Mitt Romney and Moroni. Switch the letters around a little and Moroni becomes Romni. The sounds are there. This is how they get their dangerous satanic cult into the physical world. People would soon be worshipping the Church of Romney and they won’t know who they’re really worshipping. People need to wake up, look around you to see these brainwashed automatons walking around with that glazed look in their eyes. Look at these Mormon churches, they look like alien space ships. These people are forced to give away 15% of all their salary to the church, the women are forced to marry as many men as they can. These poor, poor brainwashed lemmings are more wacko than David Koresh’s Waco church, and that’s saying something. You want to vote for Romney, well go ahead Moroni, make my day,” a Capitol Hill insider told CNN on Tuesday.

Daily Squib Book

DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
Disqus Comments Loading...
Share
Published by

Recent Posts

WW3 WATCH: Why is Russia Mass Producing Nuclear Shelters?

MOSCOW - Russia - The Kremlin has ordered the mass production of nuclear shelters throughout…

3 hours ago

EXPERTS: “Net Zero” is Impossible to Achieve Unless…

LONDON - England - The Earthwise think tank has outlined why it is futile for…

5 hours ago

Netanyahu Forced to Travel in Disguise After ICC Puts Out Arrest Warrant

TEL AVIV - Israel - Israeli PM Benjamin Netanyahu may be forced to wear a…

14 hours ago

“Two Jags” John Prescott Goes to the Great Pie in the Abyss

HELL - The Eternal Inferno - "Two Jags" former Labour Deputy John Prescott will soon…

1 day ago

Experts: How Peaceful Protest Against Labour Tyranny Can Work

LONDON - England - A think tank has outlined methods ordinary citizens can conduct peaceful…

1 day ago

Forget Bacon and Eggs Labour Want to Replace Traditional Farms With Maggot Farms

GRIMSBY - England - Labour is planning to completely exterminate and erase traditional farms, replacing…

2 days ago

This website uses cookies.