Nick Clegg Fails UK Citizenship Test Could Be Deported

LONDON - England - Deputy prime minister, Nick Clegg, has failed his UK Citizenship Test for the third time and will be removed from the UK, border control officials have revealed.

“We’re not actually sure where he’s from but he’s definitely not from Britain, that’s for sure.” a Border Agency worker disclosed to the Daily Mail.

Things have been rather tough for Clegg since joining the Coalition government, and he will surely be glad to be out of the heat of the frying pan and back to obscurity.

Speaking from his home, Nick Clegg said: “My political allegiance lies slightly to the left…no just left of centre…maybe somewhat to the right…a tiny bit left and right…oh, how about diagonal south west…maybe east, west…thirty degrees north?”

Tory MP, Sullivan Pratter, said: “There’s two things I like about Nick Clegg — his face. As for where he came from, I don’t think even he knows. No one actually knows who he really is or what he’s doing here.”

Daily Squib Book

DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
Disqus Comments Loading...
Share
Published by

Recent Posts

The Public Sacrifice of Trump and the Dawn of a New Age of Women

WASHINGTON DC - USA - The dawn of a new age of women calls for…

21 hours ago

Why Labour is Killing Off Aspiration, Entrepreneurs and Deterring Foreign Investors

LONDON - England - We provide the reasons why the Labour Party is killing off…

21 hours ago

It’s Over For Trump: The Swamp Preparing to Release Kamala

WASHINGTON DC - USA - The Swamp is preparing to unleash Kamala Harris fully on…

2 days ago

Tories Choose Non-Hardline Diversity Candidate Kemi Badenoch as Next Leader

LONDON - England - The Tories have chosen Kemi Badenoch as their new leader.

3 days ago

The Dekulakization of British Farms is Underway

THE COUNTRYSIDE - England - Say goodbye to British farms as Labour conducts a policy…

3 days ago

Early Votes Indicate Kamala Harris Will Win Election

WASHINGTON DC - USA - Kamala Harris is well ahead with early ballots counted, and…

4 days ago

This website uses cookies.