17.7 C
London
Friday, November 22, 2024
secret satire society
HomeWorldWealthy Travellers Don't Want to Travel Back to Ireland

Wealthy Travellers Don't Want to Travel Back to Ireland

ESSEX - England - The Dale Farm travellers who have built permanent structures illegally on someone's farm are refusing to travel back to their mansions in Ireland, a crusty spokeswoman said yesterday.

“These travellers don’t like travelling. In fact, they’re staying right here on someone’s land and refusing to travel. Maybe they should change their names to campers instead of travellers,” a bemused local from the Dale Farm area in Essex told the BBC.

The local council has been trying to persuade the travellers to carry on travelling again after a long stasis on the farm land.

“These travellers don’t pay any form of taxation in England even though they own houses in Limerick, Ireland, and live off our surrounding areas by stealing from the general population. We are trying to make them travel again, like their name suggests. They should travel back to their houses there and pay their f*cking bills for a change, f*cking lying scroungers,” Bridlington Council’s chief told ITV news.

Six hundred of the so-called travellers all own £300,000 homes registered in the village of Rathkeale, County Limerick, in the west of Ireland.

“While they’re in their illegally encamped dwellings in Essex, England, they do not pay council tax, or any form of taxation, electricity or gas, and they rent out their properties in Ireland,” one of the camp’s insiders has revealed.

The encampment is currently guarded by a group of crusties, who are not anarchists as the mainstream media may call them wrongly, but simply disaffected morons looking for a cause to champion. If they only knew how the so-called travellers are amassing huge fortunes with their parasitical revenue growth system and using them to tout in front of salivating BBC news crews.

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
- Advertisment -

NEWS ON THE HOUR

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!