17.7 C
London
Saturday, November 2, 2024
secret satire society
HomeWorldSunseekers Going to Desperate Lengths to Get Prime Spot on Beaches

Sunseekers Going to Desperate Lengths to Get Prime Spot on Beaches

ALICANTE - Spain - Sunseekers are going to extraordinary lengths to get prime spots on the country's beaches.

Sunseekers who religiously seek the prime spot of the beaches, and sun beds, are going to extraordinary lengths to make their summer holidays truly wondrous.

Forget about German holidaymakers placing their towels on sun beds at 3am to get the best spots for the next day, a new trend is even more extreme.

“These sunseekers storm the beach and get the sun beds before anyone can even bat an eyelid. It’s like the storming of Normandy beach, except in Spain,” one angry tourist said who had to sit on a rock after the prime beach areas were taken.

The alarming trend is now a frequent occurrence across the whole of Spain’s coast.

Miguel Conquistador, 49, from Alicante, was shocked when he was about to place his beach towel on the sand in a prime spot from the sea when he was affected by the phenomenon.

“I was just about to place my towel on the sand, when suddenly out of the sea a group of sunseekers suddenly landed their boat and rushed towards me. In a matter of seconds, my towel had been kicked away and 67 people were sitting in my spot.”

These sudden landings by sunseekers is actually great news for Spain, and should be encouraged to the full.

Not migrants

“These are sunseekers on their summer holidays, and not migrants. It’s a beautiful sight to see people who are dedicated to the beach life taking so much care and attention to their summer holidays. We invite them to Spain, please come, enjoy our beaches, our wine, our women. You are all welcome,” Spain’s Interior Minister, Rodriguez Schengenado, told Spanish news networks on Tuesday.

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
- Advertisment -

NEWS ON THE HOUR

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!