TSA Speed Dating Now Big Hit at U.S. Airports

KENTUCKY - USA - This Thanksgiving, single Americans have been having a wonderful time at the nation's airports.

Check-in and security screening has never been so fun for single people looking to hook up with a nice ‘piece of ass’.

“They get us all into a room and then turn out the lights, then you hear machines whirring as the TSA screeners check to see the size of your genitals. Once that’s done, everyone has five minutes each with a TSA groper, and you have to make a decision if you like what they do to you or not before you go to your gate. Already we’ve had many hookups and this is getting real popular amongst the singles,” Alfie Newman, a TSA Speed Dating organiser told Groper magazine.

The TSA Speed Dating phenomenon has also made an impression outside of America, with many world travellers wanting to join in the groping fun and maybe enjoy themselves a bit after long international flights.

“It’s all a bit of fun. You go to check-in, then you hand over your luggage. I’m talking about getting my genitalia fondled by a complete stranger. It’s absolutely thrilling stuff,” Gerald Finklestein, 45, an accountant from Miami revealed.

The TSA is currently involved in making a website for the new TSA airport dating craze that has taken America by storm and made flying a much more pleasurable experience.

Daily Squib Book

DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
Disqus Comments Loading...
Share
Published by
Tags: tsa

Recent Posts

Easy Payday: Tyson Needed the $20 Million Retirement Money

TEXAS - USA - The manufactured Mike Tyson fight against a YouTuber was a retirement…

21 hours ago

Biden Admits to Reporter He Voted For Trump

WASHINGTON DC - USA - Joe Biden has admitted to a reporter that he voted…

22 hours ago

“People’s Soviet Republic of Britain” Detains Journalist Attempting Crime of “Free Speech”

LONDON - England - We can proudly announce that an attempt at "free speech" was…

2 days ago

Commissar Rachel Reeves Praises Her Role in Ruining UK Economy

SCUNTHORPE - England - Commissar Rachel Reeves of the People's Soviet Labour Party of Britain…

3 days ago

Beyond Satire: The Onion Buys Infowars

TEXAS - USA - According to reports, corporate entity, The Onion, has acquired the Infowars…

4 days ago

Crazy Woke Leftists Told to “Identify” As if Kamala Won Election

PORTLAND - USA - A renowned therapist is helping many crazy, woke leftists by telling…

6 days ago

This website uses cookies.