Man Wins Nobel Prize for Doing Absolutely Nothing

OSLO - Norway - An American man was today given one of the world's most prestigious prizes for doing nothing.

"Hello room service"

“This is an amazing honour. I am truly humbled for winning this prize for doing fuck all. What do I get when I actually do something?” the bemused man said before stepping onto Air Force One.

Could this be something to do with ‘Change’? In this case there has been none.

War is Peace

One of the judges who voted on the prize panel said: “This guy just turned up out of nowhere. Hell, he doesn’t even have a valid birth certificate, so we just thought we would give him a Nobel Peace Prize instead.”

The prize winner is over the moon and retired to the Oval room to twiddle his thumbs and put his feet up on the desk.

“He’s lazy. He sleeps all day and most of the night. He wakes up and orders six buckets of chicken, walks on water for a bit then goes back to fucking sleep. The boy’s done shit all for the country let alone for the world. Shucks, who they gonna give the prize to next? Dubya? He deserves it more than this guy, but he actually did something like murder millions of people in cold blood and bring America’s economy to its knees,” a Pentagon official told CBS news today.

Daily Squib Book

DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"