Europe Prepared For Sharia Law

BRUSSELS - Belgium - The European Union is committed to integration of Sharia law under Islamic teachings, and is preparing the public for major changes due to the mass migration from the Middle East.

The world is changing at breakneck speed and so are the laws governing the EU.

European technocrats are preparing the continent for Sharia law as the pace of migrants from the Middle East and Africa increases daily.

Speaking from Brussels, Jens Toldtars, an EU official revealed that many things will have to change as Europe accepts millions of new people.

“Women will have to be more modest in their attire as showing any skin is strictly haram, there will not be any alcohol and Fridays will be the time of prayer as the Muezzins make their calls to visit the mosques. These are just the small things that will change. No more pork, ham or sausages, this order may be hard for the Germans, but they will get used to it, especially as the punishment for not adhering to these laws is being beaten or stoned. Adulterers will be stoned, thieves will have their hands chopped off and we are currently discussing how to go ahead with beheading, we may re-introduce the guillotine as it is a far more efficient, less messy way of conducting executions.”

Under Islamic law men are allowed to have up to twenty wives each, and women are not allowed to drive vehicles under some severe regimes like Saudi Arabia. As of yet, the EU is under consultation with Islamic scholars on how best to implement the new laws.

Daily Squib Book

DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
Disqus Comments Loading...
Share
Published by

Recent Posts

“Two Jags” John Prescott Goes to the Great Pie in the Abyss

HELL - The Eternal Inferno - "Two Jags" former Labour Deputy John Prescott will soon…

7 hours ago

Experts: How Peaceful Protest Against Labour Tyranny Can Work

LONDON - England - A think tank has outlined methods ordinary citizens can conduct peaceful…

9 hours ago

Forget Bacon and Eggs Labour Want to Replace Traditional Farms With Maggot Farms

GRIMSBY - England - Labour is planning to completely exterminate and erase traditional farms, replacing…

23 hours ago

Prince Harry Consults Elon Musk About Travelling to Mars

MONTECITO - USA - Prince Harry is in consultation with Elon Musk about travelling to…

1 day ago

Comrade Xi Jinping Commends Comrade Starmer on Soviet Britain’s Communist Vision

RIO DE JANAIRO - Brazil - Comrade Xi Jinping has praised Comrade Starmer for crushing…

2 days ago

Support the Farmers and Their Protest Against Unjust Labour Tax

LONDON - England - Farmers are in Westminster today protesting an unjust Labour tax that…

2 days ago

This website uses cookies.