17.7 C
London
Wednesday, October 30, 2024
secret satire society
HomeWorldBBC Forced to be Impartial at Gun Point

BBC Forced to be Impartial at Gun Point

SALFORD - England - THE BBC could be forced at gun point to be neutral during the in/out referendum on Britain's membership of the European Union.

BBC news studios will have trained armed adjudicators attending during and leading up to the EU referendum, ministers have revealed.

The proposed amendment to the EU Referendum Bill, tabled by a group of Labour and Tory backbenchers, would see the corporation monitored by an “armed impartiality adjudicator”.

The new, independent impartiality adjudicators would be armed with Heckler & Koch sub machine guns and on standby inside BBC news rooms to act immediately on any accusation of bias within the BBC.

Tory MP John Kalashnicough said: “The independent adjudicators are highly trained in impartiality and marksmanship, all it would take for a BBC newsreader would be a wrong word here or there rooting for the EU. Bang! Of course, we will make sure the screens are blanked out so the audience does not see what happens.”

A BBC spokesman said: “The BBC is already committed to impartiality under the terms of its Charter and editorial guidelines, *cough* Bu-u-u-u-ll-sh-i-t!”

After the BBC spokesman said that, he was summarily taken to the back of the studio and executed.

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
- Advertisment -

NEWS ON THE HOUR

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!