17.7 C
London
Sunday, November 17, 2024
secret satire society
HomeWorldHillary Clinton Shapeshifts LIVE on TV

Hillary Clinton Shapeshifts LIVE on TV

NEW YORK - Hillary Clinton is caught live on camera shapeshifting. The Daily Squib can exclusively reveal to the world this amazing phenomenon.

Hillary Clinton Video Special

During the filming at a private party the Senator was caught with her claws out. Shapeshifters rarely get caught on camera, but this time it was plain for all to see.

Hillary Clinton, who has never been filmed blinking and is a breed unto herself, sometimes has problems holding onto her human form.

Dark Secret

Some experts and members of the scientific community have known for some time that Hillary has a dark secret. Her true shape is only known to a few people in her close knit circle.

“What you see in this video is only a partial human transformation. Hillary has lost control of her human cloak for a few seconds and this is when you see her reptilian claws,” James Brubeck, from the Institute of Mechanical Sciences in Los Alamos, who studied the videos frame by frame told the Daily Squib.

“This is truly amazing stuff. Whoever leaked this video is going to get into deep trouble if they are ever caught.”

Members of her entourage have also revealed Hillary’s terror tactics on unsuspecting Obama supporters. In this account she makes an Obama supporter cower in fear just from one look:

“I’ve seen her [Hillary] look into peoples eyes and they shrink away in pain. She really is not human I tell ya, dang scary. I’ve seen her use her powers to full effect in this campaign by intimidating Obama supporters into submission. All it takes is a quick glance and they usually lose all colour and start to sweat profusely. Some have even choked. It’s like the Darth Vader effect. It’s just like that.”

Coaxing human emotion out of something like Hillary is like trying to get blood out of stone it seems. She does not seem to have human emotions like us and is driven solely by the desire for total power and survival at all cost.

Watch Hillary Clinton’s claws and face shift, subtle changes can be seen.

 

Scientific literature documents reveal that tests were attempted on Hillary Clinton to determine what genus and DNA structure she has. Medical scientists wrote a piece in the Lancet journal last month on creatures who appear outwardly human but who disguise their true forms.

“These creatures have very advanced DNA and genetic structures which can shift shape and colour. An example in the animal kingdom would be certain breeds of chameleons, deep sea squids and jellyfish. We have tried to establish the genus of Hillary Clinton and other politicians but as of yet science is not able to find any creature on earth like them,” Chief Physician Dr. Manolo Brigante wrote in the journal.

With the scientific community bereft of research subjects the discovery of Hillary Clinton is a big find. What distinguishes Hillary from the others is their “superior DNA shapeshifting structures” — an above-average ability to genetically change shape at will, Brigante said.

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"

4 COMMENTS

  1. I have dealt a lot with those horrible shapeshifters. Hillary Clinton is a power driven, unemotional, reptilian horror who is a victimizer if I ever knew one. Too bad most people are not perceptive or innerly strong enough to withstand that type of creature. With the reptilian Bushes we are on an unavoidable collision course with fate.

  2. This story is incredible cuz I have actually seen Hillary shapeshift for a few seconds in Denver Colorado. It was only for a few seconds and my wife saw it too. We were both very upset by it. Spread the word people. They’re not human!

Comments are closed.

- Advertisment -

NEWS ON THE HOUR

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!