Scotland: Tories Scrapping HS2 Instead Opting For Hadrian’s Wall 2 (HW2)

LONDON - England - The expensive HS2 rail link has been scrapped by the new Conservative government, who are now looking into a better solution for the Scotland problem -- Hadrian's Wall 2.

 

“Why spend billions on a useless fucking rail link that will carve up the countryside and be of little benefit to the populace, when we have a much more urgent problem to deal with — the Scots.

“Our plan is to scrap the HS2 rail link and channel the money into building a 400 foot high wall separating Scotland from England. Much like the Romans did 1,500 odd years ago, however this time the walls will be guarded by automated gun turrets and electric shock deterrents,” Henry Davenplatter, head engineer for the HW2 project told parliament today.

SNP leader, Nicola Sturgeon today released a communique via a raid on some English villages along the border.

“We will burn your homes down. No HW2 project can stop us. The Romans were a bunch of toga wearing ponces, what chance do ye Southern bastards have?”

Daily Squib Book

DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
Disqus Comments Loading...
Share
Published by
Tags: scotlanduk

Recent Posts

“Two Jags” John Prescott Goes to the Great Pie in the Abyss

HELL - The Eternal Inferno - "Two Jags" former Labour Deputy John Prescott will soon…

8 hours ago

Experts: How Peaceful Protest Against Labour Tyranny Can Work

LONDON - England - A think tank has outlined methods ordinary citizens can conduct peaceful…

10 hours ago

Forget Bacon and Eggs Labour Want to Replace Traditional Farms With Maggot Farms

GRIMSBY - England - Labour is planning to completely exterminate and erase traditional farms, replacing…

23 hours ago

Prince Harry Consults Elon Musk About Travelling to Mars

MONTECITO - USA - Prince Harry is in consultation with Elon Musk about travelling to…

1 day ago

Comrade Xi Jinping Commends Comrade Starmer on Soviet Britain’s Communist Vision

RIO DE JANAIRO - Brazil - Comrade Xi Jinping has praised Comrade Starmer for crushing…

2 days ago

Support the Farmers and Their Protest Against Unjust Labour Tax

LONDON - England - Farmers are in Westminster today protesting an unjust Labour tax that…

2 days ago

This website uses cookies.