Syria Meeting Carbon Targets

ALEPPO - Syria - The war torn country is set to meet its carbon emission quota by 2018, the Global Carbon Targets Board has revealed, because there won't be any goddamn people left soon.

Carbon lifeforms are being reduced by the millions in Syria and may even exceed targets for 2018 says the Obama administration agency in charge of global emission carbon targets.

“Without anyone left in Syria, carbon emissions will be reduced considerably. We have given the country an A+ status for this alone. We are pleased with the current progress being made and will increase funding to other countries that adopt the same strategy for reducing carbon emissions globally,” Niles Flatter, revealed in a recent report published in the Wall Street Journal.

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