17.7 C
London
Friday, November 22, 2024
secret satire society
HomeSportsSwarms of Giant Bees Attacking South African World Cup Stadiums

Swarms of Giant Bees Attacking South African World Cup Stadiums

CAPE TOWN - South Africa - Millions of noisy angry African bees have been attracted to the stadiums where the world cup games are being held, South African FIFA officials have revealed.

“The sound of the swarming bees is deafening. No one on the pitch can hear the referee blow his whistle and no one can hear the crowd cheering. The angry African bees seem to be attracted to the bright coloured football kits of the players and the bright clothes of the fans,” a FIFA match official told South Africa’s weekly, the Soweto Telegraph.

The bee swarms have invaded all of the stadiums where every world cup fixture is being held, and a number of people have been stung by the bees.

“Being stung by the bees was nothing, it was the bloody noise they made that really hurt. I’d rather be stung on my nut sack then listen to that racket all day,” Geoffrey Alcoa, a fan who travelled all the way from Holland said.

Roger Attenberry, a naturalist filming a BBC nature program in the Kruger national park said: “One of my assistants managed to capture a few bees for my analysis from the stadium in Johhanesburg. After studying them I have identified the bees as part of the Vuvuzelus Apis genus. A particularly aggressive and noisy strain of bee that is attracted to South African football matches.”

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
- Advertisment -

NEWS ON THE HOUR

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!