Ryanair to Fly Passengers to Moon For Under £5

DUBLIN - Ireland - In direct competition with Virgin Galactic, Ryanair will offer flights to the moon for less than £5 when it eventually builds a space rocket in a few years time.

Michael O’Leary, the airline’s chief executive, told an Irish news network yesterday that he would offer tickets to the moon for £4.20.

However, he admitted that passengers would have to pay extra if they want to come back.

“Once we get you to the moon, we’ll ask you for £1,985,000. If you ain’t got it, then we’ll drop you off at the moon, charge you an extra luggage handling fee surcharge of £300,000, and if you can’t pay that, we’ll take your feckin’ luggage as well, without a feckin’ space suit may I add,” O’Leary said babbling inanely.

The flights on a state of the art space rocket, which is being built in a shed in Tipperary, would leave from someone’s back garden that O’Leary plans to rent out for 20 euros a week.

On hearing of the Ryanair news, Richard Branson got up from his hammock, yawned, then went back to sleep.

Do you value freedom?

SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB We fight for freedom, justice, satire and coffee. DUE TO THE NATURE OF OUR JUVENALIAN SATIRE, AND CENSORSHIP WE CAN ONLY SURVIVE BY DONATIONS. PLEASE CONSIDER DONATING. THANK YOU. Biden Censorship | Starmer Censorship | Google Censorship
Disqus Comments Loading...
Share
Published by

Recent Posts

Far Leftists Celebrate as Their Enabled Terrorists Massacre More Jews

BONDI - Australia - The latest massacre killing 16 Jewish civilians by a terror call,…

19 hours ago

‘Open Borders’ Green Party Leader Wants More Diversity in Cottaging Industry

HACKNEY - England - The 'open borders' Green Party leader is fed up with the…

2 days ago

The Daily Squib Sold Out!

LONDON - England - The Daily Squib Anthology has sold out!

2 days ago

“Comrades! It’s Working! Heavy Taxation Contracted the Economy by 0.1%”

LONDON - England - Commissar Rachel Reeves has praised her heavy taxation policies, which have…

3 days ago

Prepare For War With Russia While EU Funds Russia by Buying Their Oil and Gas

BRUSSELS - Belgium - Mark Rutte, the NATO chief, said today that Europe must prepare…

4 days ago

Stop Crying Brexit Never Happened Anyway

LONDON - England - People are crying that Labour are cosying up to the EU…

4 days ago

This website uses cookies.