17.7 C
London
Sunday, December 22, 2024
secret satire society
HomeSci/TechBald Men Being Cured by Pubic Hair Transplants

Bald Men Being Cured by Pubic Hair Transplants

ZHELAIZHAI - China - Bald men are flocking to a research institute in North East China to receive a cure for their bald scalps.

ai

You may have a bald scalp, but have plenty of pubic hair.

Scientists at the Institute of Baldness in Zhelaizhai, Gansu province, China have come up with an amazing cure for baldness that will soon go worldwide.

“We developed the treatment of baldness by simply implanting hair from the patient’s pubic area onto their skull. The process can use any pubic hair from any donor which can then be dyed and treated on the patient’s scalp,” Dr. Qing Yuan revealed on Chinese state news site, Xinhuanet.

Currently, there is no other known cure for baldness, and having a full head of hair is sought after by millions of men around the world.

One subject of the institute came to China all the way from the Netherlands to have his new head of hair.

Anders Gerter, 48, from Valkenburg aan de Geul, started to cry when he saw his new head of hair, such was the feeling of utter joy.

“I lost my hair when I was 34 years old. I have lived as a bald man ever since, and I am so grateful for the treatment I have received at the institute. The procedure was very simple and fast. I went in in the morning and by the afternoon I had a full head of hair. Look at the beautiful frizzes, and I always wanted a perm, it is like a dream come true.”

The pubic hair is cultivated from thousands of donors, and then treated to kill off any infestations that may be present.

In China a whole new industry has grown up selling pubic hair to such research institutes. For four kilos of pubic hair, Chinese people can gain over £3.50 for their effort, and in the rural areas this has now become a huge industry.

 

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
ds-freedom-expression-banner
- Advertisment -ds-santa-banner

NEWS ON THE HOUR

ds-pope-banner

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!