Sci/Tech

EU Releases Ransomware Virus Onto Brexit Britain

LONDON -England - The virus that has infected and effectively shut down 95% of government computers in the UK was penned and designed by a rogue group of hackers called the European Union Commission.

The virus demands Britain pays the hacking group £85 billion in Bitcoins or all data on the computers will be deleted.

GCHQ has identified one of the hackers as a guy called Juncky, his real name is Jean Claude Juncker, who is well known to the authorities as a very dangerous malevolent joker character.

Ransomware

“We have tracked this hacking group to a building in Brussels, Belgium. Juncky and his crew are a highly dangerous team of experts in the field of blackmail, extortion and many other criminal activities,” Miles Eaveridge, senior cyber crimes analyst at MI6 revealed today.

If your computer has been affected by this malicious virus, do not pay the ransom, just delete everything and start again with your backed up data with a clean slate.

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