Women in Cologne Are Snapping Up New Japanese Invention

COLOGNE - Germany - Following the sex assaults and rapes on women in Cologne and Hamburg on New Year's Eve, the demand for a new Japanese invention has surged.

Germans are snapping up a new Japanese invention that shoots out a net at an assailant enabling the women to escape or call police.

Demand for over the counter self defence products rose in response to the massive sex assaults, brutal gang rapes, and thefts committed by Arab and North African migrants in Cologne and Hamburg on New Year’s Eve.

The Japanese device can be used by multiple women on the same person, and is proving so useful that production has increased to cope with the massive demand.

Reminiscent of something you would find in a live-action superhero television show, the net launcher is a handheld device that shoots out a net projectile.

The launcher is reloadable and has two different net cartridges. One type of cartridge just fires out a net. The other type of cartridge fires out a net with a line that can be pulled.

The launcher has a built-in alarm to alert others that the device has been fired. The net can be fired from 2 to 3 meters from the intended target.

When two or more nets are used together, the sex crazed migrant will be completely engulfed in netting and will have a very difficult time trying to escape.

The Japanese company is also planning to introduce a metallic net that will electrocute the assailant once the device is released.

Ichi Yoshimitsu, CEO for the company said: “Once the threat is neutralised by the net, we also administer 60,000 volts intermittently onto the person until the police eventually arrive.”

German women will need the devices more than ever now as an extra 10 million Arabs are set to arrive in Germany by 2017.

Daily Squib Book

DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
Disqus Comments Loading...
Share
Published by

Recent Posts

Netanyahu Forced to Travel in Disguise After ICC Puts Out Arrest Warrant

TEL AVIV - Israel - Israeli PM Benjamin Netanyahu may be forced to wear a…

6 hours ago

“Two Jags” John Prescott Goes to the Great Pie in the Abyss

HELL - The Eternal Inferno - "Two Jags" former Labour Deputy John Prescott will soon…

16 hours ago

Experts: How Peaceful Protest Against Labour Tyranny Can Work

LONDON - England - A think tank has outlined methods ordinary citizens can conduct peaceful…

18 hours ago

Forget Bacon and Eggs Labour Want to Replace Traditional Farms With Maggot Farms

GRIMSBY - England - Labour is planning to completely exterminate and erase traditional farms, replacing…

1 day ago

Prince Harry Consults Elon Musk About Travelling to Mars

MONTECITO - USA - Prince Harry is in consultation with Elon Musk about travelling to…

2 days ago

Comrade Xi Jinping Commends Comrade Starmer on Soviet Britain’s Communist Vision

RIO DE JANAIRO - Brazil - Comrade Xi Jinping has praised Comrade Starmer for crushing…

2 days ago

This website uses cookies.