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Sunak Tories: Retirement Age Pushed to 20 Years After Death

Heinrich Sitzfleisch
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Sunak Tories: Retirement Age Pushed to 20 Years After Death

Jeremy Hunt, the Chancellor of the Exchequer of the Rishi Sunak Tory government, today announced the wonderful news that the retirement age in the UK will now be 20 years after your death.

But that’s not all, citizens will be taxed fully during the post-death 20-year period and those who do not pay the tax could receive heavy penalties and fines from the Inland Revenue. Funnily enough, someone called Nadhim Zahawi will be exempt from all proposals.

“We want to be sure we get every drop of your money out of you, dead or alive,” Mr Hunt said, grinning like a Cheshire cat.

In other news, the pathetic ‘Levelling Up’ slogan was revealed to be just a slogan for the impending General Election in 2024 in which the Tories are guaranteed to lose.

Doomsday Clock Putin: “Why do we need such a world where there is no Russia?”

Heinrich Sitzfleisch
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0
Doomsday Clock Putin: “Why do we need such a world where there is no Russia?”

The world is now stuck within a paradoxical imbroglio and a never-ending cycle of war. The West must defend Ukraine, yes, of course it must, however it was the West who coerced the sleeping bear to act in the first place. If it were not for meddling in Ukrainian affairs before Putin snapped and invaded Crimea, we would all not be on the edge of nuclear war right now. The Obama administration meddled in Ukraine, and now in 2023, we are still living with the ultimate consequences. For the Russians, Ukraine was meant to be a buffer to NATO. The Obama administration took that away, resulting in the invasion of Ukraine. Of course, Ukrainians wanted to be free from Russian control, however freedom does come with consequences, especially from a brutal master like Putin.

As the Doomsday Clock ticks closer to midnight, the deranged chemo brain of Putin is also ticking away. Riddled with cancer, Putin is now at his most dangerous, simply because he is himself dying and his obsessive love for Mother Russia is the only thing keeping him barely alive.

Putin firmly believes that the world does not deserve to exist if Russia is somehow undermined or ideologically defeated by the West. The buffer zone of Ukraine was politically taken away from him, and this brought a red mist over the Russian leader. On the 20th February 2014, Putin began his operation to annex the Crimean Peninsula. The incessant baiting of the sleeping bear by the West eventually worked. The grotesque atrocities and genocide committed against the Ukrainian civilians by the Russians was testament to the rage instilled in the Russian troops through brainwashing and propaganda.

IF YOU CAN’T HEAR THE DRUMS OF WAR…

The second ‘Special Operation’ to complete the Russian conquest and in their mind ‘repatriation’ of Ukraine took place on the 24th February 2022.

Up until today, the Russians have taken huge losses, and the Russian army has revealed to the world how poorly equipped and trained the majority of their recruits are. With low morale and poor equipment, conscripts are looked upon as mere cannon fodder, mashed into mincemeat in the meat grinder frozen fields of Donbas.

With Western weapons and tanks now operating against the Russians, they are now probably desperate. The Russian Z propaganda may play all over the country but as a symbol, it is viewed as equivalent to a Nazi swastika. The Russians claim they are fighting Nazis in Ukraine, yet they themselves are actively acting like Nazis and fascists themselves. One only has to hear the rhetoric and opinions spewed on Russian TV to see how the former soviets have somehow morphed into the fascists they supposedly hate so much. You become what you hate, and the Russians are the world’s Nazis now, however not with an efficient Blitzkrieg army but a rabble of convicts released from prison and Wagner militia.

If Putin dies tomorrow or has already died, there will be no change, simply because the nutters have taken over the asylum (Kremlin). At least during the Soviet era post-Stalin there was a politburo to keep everything in check — now there is nothing.

The initial skirmish may include a few dirty bombs here or there. Heathrow Airport recently detected a sizeable amount of uranium being delivered to some Iranians (Russian proxies).

The Doomsday Clock is now ticking away…

Google Killer: ChatGPT Takes the Ultimate AI Prize

Heinrich Sitzfleisch
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0
Google Killer: ChatGPT Takes the Ultimate AI Prize

As Tony Montana once said “Every dog has his day.” Google may have finally met their match — ChatGPT. Everyone is going frickin’ insane over the AI which has effectively dethroned mega-monopoly bully boys Google. At one point, Google even had a motto “don’t be evil” which they quietly retired after they actively and knowingly became evil.

The skewed Google search engine is all we had for decades, but now ChatGPT basically shits on that biased thing that has been used to turn elections and only favour corporate conglomerates with unlimited cash for advertising.

In fact, the Google/Alphabet monopoly is so scared, they have even recalled original founders Sergey Brin and Larry Page from their permanent vacations.

The re-engagement of Google’s founders, at the invitation of the company’s panicking current thief executive, Sundar Pichai, emphasized the urgency felt among many Google executives about artificial intelligence and that chatbot, ChatGPT.

Eventually, AI will supersede and improve on many traditional jobs from programmers/designers/accountants/lawyers/journalists, but thankfully political satire and the genre of satirical literature is pretty much safe.

https://openai.com/blog/chatgpt/

Man Gifted With Case of Drug-Resistant Super Gonorrhoea

Heinrich Sitzfleisch
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Man Gifted With Case of Drug-Resistant Super Gonorrhoea

“It’s a gift that keeps on giving,” the man said as green puss flowed from the large boils on his appendage. According to US scientists, this particular drug-resistant strain has the ability to sidestep six of the seven drugs that health authorities track for potential resistance. It carries a change to the “penA60 allele” – a gene mutation – which has been linked to previous ceftriaxone-resistant cases in Nevada, the United Kingdom, and Asia.

“Thanks to sites like Tinder, Bumble, Grindr etc. these particularly nasty strains of Gonorrhoea can spread like wildfire,” one concerned CDC scientist revealed.

The man, who did not wish to be named, revealed that the drug-resistant super gonorrhoea strain he had contracted was relatively easy to manage.

“I keep a bucket around at all times and have to strain the goo into that, although sometimes the puss can squirt over a wide area. For example, my HD TV and sofa are now covered in the stuff. It’s painful to piss, sort of like needles in your pee pee hole. I still get Tinder dates and I don’t tell the women because it’s embarrassing. I also have HIV, Herpes, Syphilis, Chancroid, Hepatitis B, and now Gonorrhoea, but it’s all okay. The dates never realise until some time afterwards. I always persuade them to dump the condom. I’m good-looking with a 13″ Weiner, so I can get away with it.”

Doctors Fears For Madonna in World Tour Fiasco

Heinrich Sitzfleisch
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Doctors Fears For Madonna in World Tour Fiasco

Doctors have warned that due to the immense amount of Botox and plastic surgery on Madonna’s face, she may melt under the powerful lights during her concerts.

“Most of Madonna’s face could effectively melt and fall on the stage floor. The heat generated from concert lights can be very high, and her plastic surgery Botox face stretching staples could snap off. We urge her staff to conduct a safety consultation with each venue, so her face does not fall off during the concerts,” Dr Hamish McManus told the BBC.

Another physician was concerned with Madonna’s arms, which have very prominent veins showing.

“Her condition could be an amalgamation of many variables, for example steroid use, drugs, vitamin injections, along with weight lifting. We know that Madonna is a vitamin injector and has four or five vitamin injections per day. Along with her face melting and dripping onto the floor, her breast implants could explode, and the veins in her arms could burst spraying blood all over the place, especially if from the pressure one of the main arteries explodes,” Professor Ernest Finklestein, from Scunthorpe University Hospital revealed.

The doctors advise that Madonna and her management team ask for venues to turn down the lighting systems to a minimum to safeguard her health.

“The concerts should be conducted in complete darkness, or a very little amount of light. Her music is so awful, maybe they should also turn off all the amplifiers as well,” another doctor commented.

One fan wrote on Instagram: “I don’t care about what the stoopid docs say! Hell, what a souvenir if her face fell off into the crowd! I booked my ticket already!”

Madonna, who has one of the most used vaginas in the business, is said to have signed up to have it donated to science after her death.

Cancel Culture News: Thanos Wants to Cancel Half Universe

Heinrich Sitzfleisch
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Cancel Culture News: Thanos Wants to Cancel Half Universe

We are receiving news that there is some guy called Thanos who wants to cancel exactly half of the population of the universe, obviously including all life on earth. Cancel culture seems to be a philosophy not only carried out by bullying totalitarian censorious Marxist scumbags on earth, but some green dude from outer space.

“Fun Isn’t something one considers when balancing the universe. But this… does put a smile on my face,” Thanos said on Friday.

Cancel culture on earth is what happens when vindictive, ruthless Marxists want to show off their power by totally ruining a known figure’s career completely just because they voiced their own opinion. They and their career are entirely erased, and they leave as if they never existed in the first place. The latest victim of cancel culture seems to be some guy called Jeremy Clarkson, who is the target of vindictive entity Meghan Markle. At one point, Clarkson was sort of well known, but as of tomorrow will have been cancelled from all existence.

“I do not know who this Clarkson is? If he is Asgardian, no matter, he will be deleted. What is a Meghan Markle? Sounds like something to squash with extreme prejudice. You could not live with your own failure, and where did that bring you? Fine, I’ll do it myself. When I am finished, none of these entities will exist!”

This means when Thanos clicks his fingers, some of the cancel culture idiots will themselves be cancelled along with the rest. Cancel culture truly has taken a turn for the worst.

“Perfectly balanced, as all things should be…”

Starmer Courting Goldman Sachs and EU at Davos

Heinrich Sitzfleisch
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0
Starmer Courting Goldman Sachs and EU at Davos

Clues to who will be instated as a government are always clear to see by watching who attends the World Economic Forum at Davos. Labour leader, Keir Starmer, is at Davos this year with his minions courting the likes of Goldman Sachs and assuring EU autocrats that Labour will work closely with the soviet collectivist bloc to repair relations and to garner a closer working relationship after he wins the election in 2024.

Undoing all the work of Brexit will thus be a subject on the agenda, and it is ultimately a sign that once Labour gains power, Brexit in name only will be the way policy will go.

The current Tory government under unelected technocrat Rishi Sunak, and high tax Jeremy Hunt, is trailing in the polls by nearly 30 points to Labour. Many Brexiteers have left the Tories and are now looking for other avenues and parties. Britain is currently mired by daily strikes by NHS staff, rail workers, postal workers and even civil servants, teachers. High inflation is making life a misery for working people, and high interest rates are killing the economy as well as causing immense pain to homeowners with mortgage payments.

Keir Starmer along with the Shadow Chancellor Rachel Reeves are promoting Labour’s green prosperity plan to decarbonise the economy, boost energy security and ensure Britain leads in future green industries. They are also predominantly assuring the EU that the Labour government will be working closely together to restore full economic relations.

Many voters have already made their minds up as to who they will vote for in 2024, and in most cases it certainly will not be the Tory government, who have reneged on pretty much every election promise they made.

Today, Britain is a dark place where you cannot buy a loaf of bread without taking out a bank loan. Council tax, road tax, income tax, business tax, fuel tax, value added tax, there are literally taxes upon taxes that inhibit business and aspiration. There is little or no point in working in an environment where the majority of your income is taken away by taxation and the high cost of bills.

Keir Starmer attending Davos says a lot about who will be running the country after 2024.

What to Pay Attention to When Reading a Betting Site Review

Heinrich Sitzfleisch
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0
What to Pay Attention to When Reading a Betting Site Review

Online sports betting has become big business and as a consequence, the associated world of trying to gain insight and knowledge around every bookmaker has developed exponentially in recent times. Long gone are the days of simply placing a bet and hoping it comes good, with such competition in the marketplace, every punter and bookmaker is looking for the percentiles that enable them to enjoy a successful experience when sports betting.

Reviews of sports betting sites are now commonplace in the online betting industry, as becoming more informed about every bookmaker on the market is of course a shrewd move, by all levels of punter. However, as with any online publication, having an awareness as to the credibility of the source from which it is coming from and the reliability of the piece, is absolutely essential.

There are several things a bettor should pay attention to when analysing a review of a sports betting site, simply due to the potential insight being offered out. And here some reliable and informative review sites on the market like Match.Center provide a hugely useful source of information for all levels of sports punter.

Here are some of the things that people should be on the lookout for when reading a review of an online sports betting site:

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Check the Source

It is of course a prerequisite for any website that checking the source is key, however in the world of online sports betting, it is particularly pertinent. Most online bookmakers look to promote their services in a variety of ways, and influencing the reviews that are put on the market is a tried and tested method.

Identifying the publication on any given website can give crucial insight into the workings of any online bookmaker review, and it can also be useful when looking to utilise any bookmaker offers that are on the market.

Whilst instances of fraudulent activity are becoming fewer and further between with increased legislation surrounding online betting, the reality is that there are still plenty of imitators on the market, out to scam people into parting with their money within the sports betting sphere.

Understanding the source from which any given review has originated, and having the presence of mind not to become engrossed in the recommendations of a review if something doesn’t seem right, are key for all punters.

Evaluate Every Possibility

hacking-geafbb2e6d_1280One of the biggest things that bookmaker reviews provide for punters is a holistic viewpoint on the sportsbook. All good reviews not only look at the odds being offered out and how much money a punter can gain from a given offer, but they analyse other elements of the sports betting experience such as customer service, withdrawal methods and usability.

When picking a sportsbook and utilising a review, punters need to consider what they deem to be the most important factors for them, and they need to evaluate every possibility that may manifest as a result of betting with said bookmaker. Exploring the details behind every bookmaker review and evaluating all possible eventualities will eliminate the potential for nasty surprises in the future.

Consider the Financial Ramifications

coffee-g4dc942b3c_1280Most bookmaker reviews look to be as detailed as possible when considering how to present a particular sportsbook to the reader. From the variety of odds on offer through to any special offers for new and existing players, there are always financial ramifications for punters to factor in with any given bookmaker.

When you scan through bookmaker reviews, you get a greater understanding of the financial opportunity and impact the cooperation with the chosen bookmaker will bring. And that fact should let you make an informed decision.

The very best reviews are transparent with issues such as deposit and withdrawal limits, restrictions surrounding special offers and the potential value in the general odds a bookmaker serves up.

Having a greater understanding of how a bookmaker ticks and how that can impact one financially can hugely assist a punter when analysing a bookmaker review.

Overall, sportsbook reviews are a reliable and trusted source of information for gamblers to tap into, but they should always be seen as sources of advice, which players can benefit from.

Either Everyone Goes On Strike or No One Does!

Heinrich Sitzfleisch
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0
Either Everyone Goes On Strike or No One Does!

“These inconsistent strikes are ridiculous, either everyone goes on a complete strike, or no one bloody does,” a man at an empty train station said on Tuesday.

The man has a point. If you are going to do something, might as well do it properly.We are therefore urging all unions to command their members to strike indefinitely for as long as it takes.

Trains, buses, nurses, bin men, doctors, air traffic, ambulances, teachers, journalists, sex workers, pilots, astronauts, civil servants, chimney sweeps, footballers, restaurant staff, delivery drivers, truck drivers, taxis, everyone needs to go on fucking strike.

Forget about paying your bills, your mortgage, your holiday, your credit card bills, your council tax, your HMRC accounts, your home insurance, your car insurance, just forget it all. You’re on a real strike, not some safe on off malarkey. Take a tip from the French, they know how to strike. The Gilets Jaunes are a prime example of strikers with real fucking balls. They practically laid waste to entire French cities and had the government begging them to back down.

The country would naturally come to a complete standstill as real strikes come into effect.

“That’s how you do a fuckin’ strike, mate. Like the miners did in the eighties. Just walk out and don’t come back until they pay you huge rises in salary. ‘Ere what is this on off shite? One day on, two days off, what is that? No one will bloody well notice that. Either you bastards all strike for months at a time or don’t bloody bother,” another angry geezer shouted at the top of his voice in a supermarket queue.

Davos Latest: Prostitutes Working Overtime

Heinrich Sitzfleisch
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3
Davos Latest: Prostitutes Working Overtime

Tackling global inequality is high on the agenda during this year’s meeting of over 600 specially elected world leaders and corporate CEOs.

“I talk about tackling gender inequality and greenhouse gases, and when I go back to my room I will have a few 18-year-old girls to do as I please with them, and different girls each night. Sometimes we have them line up in the morning before breakfast. I especially enjoy two or three girls servicing my meat and two veg at the same time. I arrived in my private jet and once the conference is over will leave in one too. Not only that, but I may even have a few whores on the plane journey home,” one 67-year-old delegate revealed.

World Economic Forum in Davos (Switzerland)Not all Davos delegates like girls, and some opt for young underage boys brought in, especially from Romania or Russia.

The global elite like to have their tackle tickled whilst tackling the world’s greatest problems in the Swiss resort town.

High class escorts are booked into the same hotels as high-powered bosses and their employees during the five-day summit, which started on January 16.

One sex worker named Ivanka said she dresses in business attire, so she doesn’t stand out among the executives, despite prostitution being legal in Switzerland.

“I can talk about important subjects like global food shortages and distribution systems, then have the delegate release themselves over my perfectly made up face with my flicking tongue outstretched. It’s all part of the Davos spirit,” Ivanka, who charges 700 euros per hour, plus travel expenses, revealed.

Young prostitute

Apart from plenty of Davos delegate seed, no names are ever spilled to the press, or anyone else.

“These guys want complete discretion. One wrong word or name to someone, and they make you disappear,” a frightened young man revealed from the hotel lobby.

In 2020, an investigation by The Times found at least 100 prostitutes travel to Davos for the summit, according to a Swiss police officer.

Among the topics up for discussion at this year’s summit are the Ukraine war, global inflation rates, the Great Reset, climate change and inequality.

It is said over 2,000 private-jets arrived for the Davos meeting. Along with the throng of sex workers, this year’s meeting should cause quite a bang.

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