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New Superhero Jesus Christ Video Game Hits Shelves

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What better game is there to play at 4am when you get back from a club whacked out on drugs with a greasy chilli sauced doner kebab and some equally whacked out mates? Spark up another Camberwell Carrot and fire up the bong, it’s time to play the ‘I am Jesus Christ’ video game.

Jesus Christ was a superhuman being who could walk on water, cure leprosy and turn water into wine amongst other physically impossible feats. If you buy this game, you too will be able to recreate the amazing superhuman superhero tricks that Jesus could do effortlessly. Just don’t try to fly off a tall building in real life though because unless you are Jesus, it just ain’t gonna work.

In the game you can fly around, see angels, walk on water, and cast magic tricks like in Skyrim but this time as the one and only Jesus Christ of Nazareth. This game proves that superhuman beings like Jesus once inhabited the earth. Jesus defies all known laws of physics and science and was a sorcerer of sorts, but he did it all for you. Without Jesus’ sacrifice, you would not be who you are now. Be sure to keep an eye out for your “Holy Spirit” meter, if it depletes too much when shooting out lasers or performing miracles, Jesus can get into trouble.

Download this amazing game on Steam right now and experience the wonder of being Jesus. Don’t forget to shoot Satan with your green lasers that shoot out from the palms of your hands, and don’t forget to be resurrected from your tomb after you die. You will have hours of fun along with Bible lessons that will reinforce your belief in the Bible.

The Woke West Aligning With Communist China With Loss of Democracy

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It is not just Western civilisation and democracy under threat, but the entire globe is falling mercy to woke communist ideology. The World Economic Forum and the likes of Klaus Schwab are making sure that soviet ideology is incorporated in education systems and all media, even including large corporate brands.

The model for the globe is the brutal regime of China, a genocidal communist state that treats their citizens like utter shit. We witnessed some of the ways the CCP deals with their citizens during the Covid pandemic and the recent demonstrations for democracy after a fire in Urumqi where people were locked in their homes by the authorities to burn alive. Since the Urumqi rebellion, anyone who dared to protest has been quietly rounded up by the CCP and disposed of with extreme prejudice.

The CCP long-term plan in the West was essentially demoralisation and integration into communist ideology, of course at the ultimate cost of democracy.

Over decades of demoralisation, China and other rogue nations like Russia are seeing the fruits of their labour coming to light. Wokism, censorship, cancel culture and the rewriting of all prominent Western literature and art is a step right into the arms of communist Marxist ideology pushed by China.

Essentially, the CCP wants Western culture and democracy eroded to such a point that eventually it will be interchangeable with Xi Jinping’s China. The EU is somewhat modelled on collectivist communist ideology where officials are not elected by the people but by politicians and technocrats. The EU Commission members are unelected by the people, and so is the EU President. This deficit of democracy is one of the many reasons why Britain voted to leave the EU in the first place. The USA, especially under Obama and Biden embraced soviet ideology and have brought US politics to the point of far left communist authoritarian ideology that eviscerates freedom of speech and democracy.

The future does not bode well for the West, which seems to have lost much of its democracy, free speech and ideals regarding liberty and justice. Embracing the brutal, totalitarian communist ideology of China at each turn.

Defiling the Art of Roald Dahl Kills Off the Spirit of Literature

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With the terrible news that the entire works of Roald Dahl are being defiled and corrupted by woke publishers, one can only hold these criminals and vagabonds committing atrocities on literature as vile censorious scum who should be all lined up and …

Defiling literature in this way is an evil communist exercise in censorship that is compounded by a deathly silence from most writers and publishers, that is, apart from a few brave souls who dare to voice their disgust. Hypersensitive puritan woke Marxist readers are the new Ministry of Propaganda censorship board.

If a word is in the dictionary it should be allowed to be used as intended by an author. What’s the fucking point in having a language if you cannot use the words in it?

Hundreds of changes have been made to the beloved children’s books, including no longer referring to Augustus Gloop as ‘fat’.

Other characters have had their genders changed, and words like ‘mad’ and ‘crazy’ have been removed by censors.

Soon, as in George Orwell’s 1984, dictionaries will be so slim they will be able to be read in less than an hour.

You will be a goodthinker, you will only speak woke salad lingo, you will obey, you will report those who do not adhere to woke salad rules, if you participate in crimethink you will be put in a joycamp or simply be unpersoned. ‘It’s a beautiful thing, the destruction of words. Of course, the great wastage is in the verbs and adjectives, but there are hundreds of nouns that can be got rid of as well. It isn’t only the synonyms; there are also the antonyms. After all, what justification is there for a word which is simply the opposite of some other word? A word contains its opposite in itself. Take “good”, for instance. If you have a word like “good”, what need is there for a word like “bad”? “Ungood” will do just as well — better, because it’s an exact opposite, which the other is not. Or again, if you want a stronger version of “good”, what sense is there in having a whole string of vague useless words like “excellent” and “splendid” and all the rest of them? “Plusgood” covers the meaning, or ” doubleplusgood” if you want something stronger still. Of course, we use those forms already. But in the final version of Newspeak, there’ll be nothing else. In the end, the whole notion of goodness and badness will be covered by only six words — in reality, only one word. Don’t you see the beauty of that, Winston? It was B.B.’s idea originally, of course,’ he added as an afterthought.

 

Apparently the Daily Squib is in the Top 30 Feedspot.com Satire Sites

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We are not one for charts, but we are here to promote Feedspot.com — a great place to add your RSS feed if you have a website delving into any niche subject or genre. We were informed of our inclusion on the list only today, by the lovely people at Feedspot.com.

Although some of the listings are questionable, for example: Snopes is on the list, but the parasitical scum Mikkelson who ran that awful website would not know satire if it slapped him on his fat bloated head. They are lauded as the holders of all truth, and in the past have even fact-checked blatant satirical articles written by the Daily Squib. What kind of fucking morons fact check satire, comedy or humour?

Still, it is heartening to see such a wide array of work on Feedspot. There are satire sites now even catering to the angry feminist agenda, so-called ‘satire’ sites for the woke and satire sites for nutjob Christian evangelists like the Babylon Bee. The woke will of course receive high rates of care from the likes of monopoly search engines who love anything that is watered down, soulless and empty.

The Squib, which does not adhere to any rules per se, somehow exists within this soup of inequity, we write what the fuck we want and if anyone does not like that, they can fuck off back to their safe space to suck on their dadmum’s non-milky non-binary hairy nipple.

Writing Juvenalian true satire or any form of commentary in these days of heavy Orwellian censorship and puritanical woke hypersensitivity is frankly a thankless job. Having to monitor and read news media for 24 hours a day is a terrible punishment, but it is our duty. We get little or no monetary compensation, we have no support from any conglomerate or anyone for that matter. Daily we are punished by the monopoly controllers of the search, and we are vilified as monsters by the social media Big Tech controllers who shadow-ban our profiles. Our brand of Juvenalian satire is today viewed as a crime simply because it reveals the bare truth of any given situation. The old adage, in a time of great deceit, telling the truth is a crime punishable by cancellation in an insidious putrid horrid world of cancel-culture and lies certainly applies.

Our only muse and allegiance lies in that of the satirical gods, and of course that certain Roman fellow 2,500 odd years ago — Decimus Junius Juvenalis.

“..difficile est saturam non scribere.”

EU Bans Chinese-Made Toilets Exported to Russia

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In a bid to cause a shit storm, apparently the EU banned Chinese made toilets to Russia. This was meant to be a Ukraine invasion punishment, but all Putin has to do is import the toilets directly from China and even cut costs of importation.

The EU has been secretly importing Russian gas and oil from China since the beginning of the Ukraine war. Essentially, Russian gas is sent to China where it is then packaged as Chinese gas by brokers, who then sell it at inflated cost to the EU. Everyone knows the commodity is Russian in origin, but of course no one says a word.

The EU is also dithering on sending weapons and munitions to Ukraine simply because they are shit scared that Putin will invade the rest of Europe, however there will be no stopping Putin and his cannon fodder from somehow moving further West once Ukraine capitulates to his army of Orcs. The EU nations like Germany dilly-dallying on defending Ukraine and refusing to send jets will thus cause Ukraine’s eventual defeat, and Putin will gain momentum in sweeping through the rest of Europe like a knife through butter. Thankfully for France, Macron has his nose so far up Putin’s anus that he can tickle Putin’s tonsils. Paris and its beautiful architecture will be spared as France surrenders within the first week of the coming conflict. Yes, it seems like history is a great portend to the future.

As for the shit? It spews not only from the EU, but from Russia, China and of course from the mainstream nonsense media…ad infinitum.

Brexit Betrayal: Sunak Prepares to Give ECJ Power Over N. Ireland Deal

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EU agents working to betray Britain i.e. Remoaners are congratulating themselves as Rishi Sunak is preparing to capitulate to the European Court of Justice (ECJ) overseeing the N. Ireland Brexit deal giving full power to the EU. If Sunak’s betrayal goes through, then the ECJ will implement its laws over the UK and will essentially mean that Britain will never leave the EU’s claws.

The pro-Brexit group in parliament, the ERG are most definitely against the Sunak Brexit betrayal plan, as are the DUP who have been staging a boycott of the Stormont Assembly in protest of the protocol.

Britain is also subject to the ECHR as well as the ECJ and despite a so-called Brexit, the UK is still ruled by over 4,000 EU laws which Rishi Sunak is refusing to dump.

Britain is also still applying a 20% EU fuel tax and many other EU laws which means in effect that Britain never left the EU in the first place.

To see Remoaners moaning about Brexit is laughable because Britain never left the EU, we never secured our borders and are still imprisoned by EU red tape and EU law.

The entire mess would be classified in military terms as a ‘clusterfuck’, and will not end any time soon until someone leads the country who has a set of swinging brass bollocks. With Farage worn out, Boris pursuing lucrative book deals and speaking appointments, and other parties too marginalised to make a difference, a Labour win in the 2024 election is now almost inevitable. When Labour wins, the non-Brexit will truly become a non-Brexit and will eventually morph into an EU-re-entry.

Socialist Tory Government Levelling Up Council Tax, Income Tax, Corporation Tax

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As people are now preparing themselves for a Labour government, the socialist Tory party are moving more far-left by the day. The two opposition parties are almost indistinguishable from themselves, and the high tax policies of the newly unelected Tories mirrors the Labour Party.

Silly bampot Michael Gove and his pathetic levelling up drive seems to have also been adopted by the miserly Chancellor by levelling up on the cost of living for the ordinary citizens of this once fair country.

“We are levelling up the council tax, income tax, BBC tax, Road tax, fuel tax, Green tax and corporation tax so that businesses can no longer function and ordinary people are priced out of life itself. If you voted Tory in the past, we can assure you, you will never vote Tory ever again, you silly fucking mugs,” Chancellor of the Excrutiator, Jeremy *unt said on Tuesday from the Treasury.

Here’s to levelling up where the poor people get even poorer and the supposed rich people lose a reasonable amount, as for the Middle class bourgeoisie, they have moved down several notches and are now festering amongst the working poor — a bastard situation if there ever was one. If you are unfortunate enough to still be living in London under the menacing, malicious parasite Mayor Sadiq Khan, then you will have an additional ULEZ tax to look forward to soon. Enjoy, as you are forced to fork out £15 a day just to drive to your local shops and back, or go to the hospital, or whatever you fucking have to do.

Here’s to the election in 2024, where Labour is assured a sure-fire win. Brexit will be removed from history, and taxation will keep on rising along with interest rates. It will just be the same policies as the Tories, but with different ugly faces doling out the daily punishments.

Pentagon Baffled by What These Unidentified ‘Objects’ Are and How They Stay Airborne

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The Office of the Director of National Intelligence in conjunction with a newly created Pentagon bureau known as AARO, short for All Domain Anomaly Resolution Office, is investigating the octagonal flying unidentified objects downed by the US Air Force over Lake Huron, Michigan on Sunday.

The object has no discernible means of propelling itself at high speed and manoeuvring erratically in the air. It possibly holds anti-gravitational technology that is far advanced to anything that is in circulation today.

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Most certainly, the craft/s are being examined by specialist scientists at either Groom Lake (Homey Airport) or Los Alamos facilities, where other craft have been held since the 1950s. Naturally the tin foil hat contingent are now foaming at their mouths and salivating at the mere thought that this is extra terrestrial in nature, however the Pentagon have so far denied any such findings.

Unidentified Objects

General Glen VanHerck said: “I’ll let the intel community and the counterintelligence community figure that out. I haven’t ruled out anything.”

“At this point we continue to assess every threat or potential threat, unknown, that approaches North America with an attempt to identify it,” said Mr VanHerck, head of US North American Aerospace Defense Command and Northern Command.

The UAP appears to have demonstrated unusual flight characteristics or performance capabilities that cannot be explained in conventional physical terms.

Bob Lazar talked about Element 115 as a source of antigravitational propulsion in the eighties. Element 115 did not exist according to science in the 1980s, but it does today in the year 2023 and is called Moscovium. It was first synthesized in 2003 by a joint team of Russian and American scientists at the Joint Institute for Nuclear Research (JINR) in Dubna, Russia.

Sunak Pushing For Closer Ties With China

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It’s easy to bypass massive levels of espionage, human rights violations, prison camps, genocide and atrocities committed by the brutal communist regime of the CCP’s China when money is involved, and this is why despite Chinese spy balloons all over the fucking place and Taiwan about to be invaded, the unelected technocrat Rishi Sunak wants closer ties with China.

With the UK, EU and USA drowning in Chinese spies, these days you can’t throw a chopstick without hitting one of these CCP agents in the face. Chinese espionage is literally everywhere, from the smart devices people have in their homes, to the TikTok app, to the hundreds of thousands of Chinese ‘students’, the Confucius Institute embedded in every Western university. Chinese spies are also deeply embedded in Western manufacturing, as well as companies that develop military hardware/software. Many computers sold in the West have specialist components built into the back-end, which feeds data straight back to China. All telecoms software and hardware used in the West feeds directly to the Chinese Politburo and Chinese Intelligence Service – the Ministry of State – the principal civilian intelligence, security and secret police agency of the People’s Republic of China. One could say that the Chinese know more about their Western enemy than the idiots who currently supposedly run the West do.

Along with creating more economic and political ties with China, Sunak is also courting closer ties with the EU, bypassing Brexit to forge ahead with his not so secret plan to eventually reverse any aspirations that Britain ever left the EU.

Looks like Britain’s enemies have found a deep friend in Sunak.

Why Obama Disarmed Ukraine of Any Defensive Weapons Allowing Putin to Invade in 2014

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Obama was on a mission to disarm and reduce Ukraine to a defenceless shell because of some idealistic progressive notion that: “eliminating Ukraine’s stocks of conventional weapons would ensure the safety of the Ukrainian people and people around the world, by keeping them out of conflicts around the world.”

In 2005, Barack Hussein Obama was still a US senator. He thought it would be a great idea to use $48 million in federal funding to destroy thousands of tons of Ukraine’s guns, missiles and ammunition – weapons which would have deterred Russia from invading and Annexing Crimea in 2014 thus leaving the Ukrainians defenceless.

Obama disgracefully destroyed/sold off 400,000 small arms, 1,000 anti-aircraft missiles, and more than 15,000 tons of ammunition. By disarming a country directly on the warpath of an overbearing military nation like Russia, Obama would leave Ukraine a sitting duck for invasion.

In 2014, Putin and his forces simply walked into Ukraine and annexed Crimea. Obama’s actions were the precursor for an inevitable invasion and where the idiotic Obama was blabbing on about some idealistic nonsense about “eliminating Ukraine’s stocks of conventional weapons would ensure the safety of the Ukrainian people and people around the world, by keeping them out of conflicts around the world”, Putin, just laughed and walked straight into the now weakened Ukraine.

Because Obama had crucial radar jamming also sold off to other nations, the Russians were able to fire the BUK missile at Malaysia Airlines MH17 killing 298 civilians in mid-air. It has now been reported by Dutch investigators that Putin himself signed off the release and usage of that particular missile prior to the airline disaster. Thanks to Obama, the Ukrainians could not block the tracking system of the BUK missile system because they had been persuaded to get rid of all of their defence equipment.

In 2023, the world is now closer it ever has been to total nuclear annihilation thanks to players like Barack Obama.