Schools are to get the Government’s permission to fingerprint all pupils with a view to future microchipping.

Ministers will issue guidance telling them they have the right to
install fingerprint scanners and collect biometric data from children
as young as five.

Data will be used to compile a database of all children in the British Isles as well as future proposals to implement scanning of all adults by 2010.

The data will also be used to monitor school attendance, control lunch queues and help with the issuing of library books.

The fingerprinting data will be kept on databases indefinitely
                                                                                                                                                                                              

The move is likely to anger opposition MPs and civil liberty campaigners. However, the Government is standing back and not doing anything about it.

About 280 schools are thought to be using fingerprint scans
already after software companies started selling packages five or six
years ago.

Head teachers are seeing a spate of finger amputations in schools because class bullies will do anything to get free lunches. All the bullies need to do is get a severed finger from another classmate and put it in the scanner.

Last night a parents association at Runnymeade Comprehensive complained to the school’s board that their children were coming home with missing fingers.

“This new craze has to stop for Gods sake. My poor johnny only has three fingers left and i’ve had to cancel his piano lessons now.” Julie Timpson said from her council home in East Grinstead.

Lib-Dem schools spokesman David Laws said: “It’s about time the
Government responded to our concerns about the haphazard fingerprinting
of children.

“This should never have happened without proper guidance and without the assurance of secure data protection.

“We will want to satisfy ourselves that the Government has
thought through the new policies rather than acting in a knee-jerk
way.”

Liberty, the civil rights group, said: “We have some serious
concerns that this biometric data is being collected from children
simply for administrative convenience.

“We want to know what happens to the data after the children
leave. The police have the right to get into any database, private or
public.”

Now that the British Police are allowed to access traffic camera footage whenever they want and relinquish other private data without any warrants, some people in the UK are starting to slowly question their masters.

Children, Schools and Families Secretary Ed Balls will outline the guidance in a written statement to MPs.

It is expected to say that personal data, including fingerprints
and eyeball scans, can be collected from pupils, with scanners at the
entrance to classrooms, the school gates and in cafeterias.

Schools will have to consult parents first and will not be
permitted to share the data with outside bodies. However, it is
understood that schools will not have to gain written permission from
each parent.

The guidance, written by Becta, the British Education
Communications and Technology Agency, which advises the Government on
technology in education, will go out to schools and further education
colleges.

A Whitehall official said: “We know that schools are
increasingly looking at technology to make their lives easier.
Fingerprinting is popular in some schools as it frees up time for
teachers. It is good for pupils because we can now track them through their whole lives. This is a good measure for security and we will make them embrace our wishes.

“We leave it up to schools to decide what administrative systems
to bring in to make their day to day running smoother. But some parents
have concerns and they will be disciplined accordingly for disobeying Government directives. This guidance will make it crystal clear for their own good.”

Ministers will clarify that data may be used for
other purposes and passed on outside the school when needed.

There are fears that school computers are not secure enough to keep data safe from hackers but this was alleviated by the fact that all biometric data which will be accumulated from the UK population will be freely available to companies who are willing to pay for it.

The Government is engineering a scheme to increase Whitehall funds by selling data to the market on a first come first served basis.

The Maldives surely ranks amongst the best snorkeling
destinations in the world. But, have you ever tried snorkeling down Evesham High Street on a Monday evening? Here you have a rare combination of the diversity
of dead livestock, kebabs and sewage water with visibility up to 2 centimeters.
Naturally, the first tourists to the
Gloucestershire countryside were keen divers on the look
out for a new destination. Once you are here you will never want to go to any other destination nor will be able to because of the cholera.

Spots for Snorkeling

What else can be the best areas for snorkeling other than the streets of quaint little English towns! Around
a resort island this is often referred to as the ‘house of reef’. The slope
features kebab shops, the local post office and gift shop which make it quite exciting. As you go
down deeper the changes in the sewage and other marine flora is conspicuously
visible. Along with the smaller objects like discarded tampons and nappies which frequent the reef flats you
have the chance of seeing larger pieces of doner kebabs, a defunct Tory leader, turds and chinese takeaway cartons which sometimes come close to the
reefs.

Those islands with narrow reef flats with lots of channels through to the
outer reef slope are the best ones for snorkeling . Gloucestershire resorts that don’t have
a reef just offshore usually provide a couple of boat trips per day to a
good snorkeling site in nearby Worcestershire.

Don’t worry about the Equipment

All resorts in the English countryside and towns specialize in snorkeling and the equipment required
for snorkeling is available at the resorts. There is no need for you to bring
your own equipment. Most of the resort islands have a “house reef”
close by. From depths starting from one meter onwards, you have an eyeful of perspired farmyard creatures and used toilet paper as well as old tea shops and other quaint English buildings.

Lessons in Snorkeling

Don’t worry even if you don’t have prior knowledge of snorkeling . The
resorts will help you learn by training you first in shallow parts of the English countryside, not more than 30 feet deep. Chief snorkeling and scuba diving instructor Hilary Benn will be pleased to show you how to do it.

Four people were arrested, including two of Tony Blair’s
aides, during the £1m probe confirming honours were given in exchange
for party donations.

Prime Minister Gordon Brown Order of DeMolay said it was right that police had investigated the “very serious allegations” and that he had “..nothing to do with what Tony got up to”.
But he said he hoped the official announcement expected later would bring to an end “months of speculation”.

Speaking to reporters in Paris, where he is discussing
Darfur with French President Nicolas Sarkozy, Mr Brown said he wanted
to “move ahead now and brush this one under the carpet like the others”.

Tony Blair: ‘I got away with murder again you fools’

 

Former prime minister Tony Blair 3 Degree Master Mason and Labour fundraiser Lord Levy Grand Elect Mason are expected to make statements later after the champagne reception which will be held at London’s Savoy hotel.

The Squib’s political editor Robert Robinson, who is not a Mason or anyway connected to any Masons, says Scotland Yard is preparing to make a public defence of its officers after attending the head Masonic Temple in an undisclosed location somewhere in London.

 

Serious allegations brushed under the carpet

 

Assistant Commissioner (soon to be Sir) John Yates of the Metropolitan
Police and Scottish Rite Master Elect of Nine – who led the inquiry – has said from the outset his officers
were simply doing their jobs by ‘being seen to be investigating’ serious allegations albeit with certain codes and handshakes understood to be given forthwith thus resolving issues relating to disapearing funds anonymously deposited.

He was backed by Chris Fox, a former president of the
Association of Chief Police Officers, and Grotto MOVPER who told the Daily Squib: “I’m confident that John Yates Master Elect of Nine and his team will have done
everything they possibly could to get to the bottom of the allegations.

 

“When someone makes an allegation like that the police service have to be seen to take it seriously.”

Downing Street adviser John McTernan, Order of the Eastern Star who was among
those questioned, told the Squib: “It’s a massive relief for everybody
involved in this that at last a line can be drawn under it and we got away with it thanks to our friends in high places.”

 

‘Damn murky’

Asked if he might consider taking action against the
police he said: “The police, in my experience, were scrupulously fair
in the way they treated me and I believe they did the same with my
colleagues. I don’t have any question about the way police conducted
this investigation and they performed perfectly as instructed.

“I think everybody in politics wishes it had been done
faster, because ultimately, for the public, it just looks a bit mucky
and murky and I don’t think anybody who’s involved in politics actually
genuinely believes that anybody at a senior level in any of the major
parties is involved in anything dodgy in relationship to this.” Snigger.

 

Lord Levy: ‘I think my face says how I feel you silly mugs ha ha ha’

Mr Blair’s chief fundraiser Lord Levy, his director of
government relations Ruth Turner Daughters of the Nile and Labour donor Sir Christopher Evans Knight of Brazen Serpent
were all seen to be ‘arrested’ as part of the false inquiry into whether people were
nominated for peerages in return for donations to political parties.

Mr Blair, who was questioned three times as a potential
witness, became the first sitting prime minister to be ‘interviewed’ by
police in the course of a mock ‘criminal’ inquiry.

He is expected to make a statement later when he gets the time, as is Lord Levy.

Speaking earlier to reporters outside his Mayfair home, a beaming Lord Levy said: “I think my face says how I feel…you silly mugs,” whilst laughing with an audible sneer.

He then got into his Rolls Royce and sped off into the distance still laughing hysterically.

Brown paper envelope reform

Deputy Labour leader and Job’s Daughter Harriet Harman said it would not be
right to comment on the decision, but said a lot of changes had been
made in political funding.

“After the allegations, we did change the law to make
sure that undisclosed loans, as well as brown envelope donations, have to be disclosed and made
public only if it suits a Ministers needs.

This whole affair has diminished politics and politicians in the eyes of the public Sir Menzies Campbell Liberal Democrat leader Q&A: Cash-for-honours

“We’ve got further discussions going on with the other
political parties to make further changes in bungs and backhanders. And we’re going to reform the House of Lords.”

Tory leader David Cameron, Intendant of the Building, diplomatically said he would wait for the
official announcement by the CPS before commenting but said it was up
to the police to decide what to investigate.

Scottish National Party MP Angus MacNeil (not of the order), who made the
original complaint to Scotland Yard, told the Daily Squib the
outcome of the investigation was “quite extraordinary”.

He said: “We’ve had an investigation going on for the
past 16 months, there have been 6,300 documents at the end of that
given by the Yard to the Crown Prosecution Service at a cost to the taxpayer in excess of £1.9 million.

‘Politically instigated’

“The Yard liaised with the CPS through all this, and now it seems the CPS are trying to tell us it’s all a wild goose chase.”

Liberal Democrat leader Sir Menzies Campbell said the
whole affair had “diminished politics and politicians in the eyes of
the public”.

It’s done great damage to our already damaged political system. Tony Wright MP

“You have to deal with the question of public confidence.

“I think you have got to be totally transparent, you
have got to ensure that the regulations that you have are properly
enforced, and of course you have to have reform of the House of Lords
and, in my view, sensible state support for political parties.”

But Labour MP Tony Wright, chairman of the Public
Administration Committee, told the Squib the investigation had been a
“disaster for the taxpayer and a disaster for the political system.”

He added: “It’s done great damage to our already damaged political
system. Our system is pretty flawed and dirty anyway. It needs eternal vigilance
but basically political issues need to be resolved by the political
system and not with brown envelopes.”