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Comrade Corbyn For London Mayor – Prepare For Mass Exodus

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As if it was not bad enough living in the dystopian nightmare hell of London under Sadiq Khan, now Comrade Corbyn, (Agent Cobb) is looking to become London Mayor. Not only will this precipitate a mass exodus from the capital city, but for those who have no choice but to stay, it will involve an even more horrible existence.

Just when you thought things could not get worse than mass London crime; daily stabbings, machete attacks, indiscriminate shooting, vandalism, arson and brutally violent theft as well as carjacking, bumper to bumper traffic, punitive taxation, impossible prices for everyday utilities, food prices through the roof, soaring energy bills, surveillance cameras everywhere that do nothing, ULEZ taxation, and Marxist LGBTQP, BLM, Trans indoctrination everywhere starting in kindergarten.

Permanent Stasi Lockdown

Former Stasi agent, Jeremy Corbyn has a plan for London, and it will resemble something like East Berlin during the Cold War. There are rumours that the London Mayor wants surveillance cameras not only on the streets but directly in homes. There are also plans to build a 200-foot-high wall around the M25 with armed guard towers.

Many of Generation Z, who have no idea of privacy and are huge Corbyn fans, calmly agree to being monitored indoors as well as outdoors.

CCTV In Homes

“I don’t mind if Jeremy Corbyn and his wonderful Stasi loons watch me wiping my arse in the toilet. I can even show the camera the sweetcorn left on the soiled toilet paper. Whatever they want to watch, it’s all fine with me,” Jenny Seamore, a BLM activist and member of her student communist party, revealed to the BBC.

It’s hard to find anyone who speaks English in many parts of London these days, but things will get worse even than Sadiq Khan’s third world policies. Jeremy Corbyn would invite even more poor unskilled unemployable people from all the third world nations across the globe to London. Forget about the NHS, or ever seeing a GP ever again, or sending your kid to a school.

There is only one solution — exodus.

Bonkers Prince Harry Now Thinks He is an Egyptian Pharaoh

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Bonkers Prince Harry thinks he is now an Egyptian Pharaoh and wants to be mummified in his own pyramid in Las Vegas alongside Meghan when he dies, his spokesperson Ovid Scooby has revealed to the BBC.

“Harry daily consults a reincarnated Egyptian priestess from Fresno called Amy Schmucker. She looked into her magical crystal ball and saw that Harry is actually the reincarnation of Amenhotep IV, who ruled Egypt during the period of the New Kingdom from 1351 to 1334 BC. He told me that the priestess said some funny words and immediately Harry was struck by this feeling that he really truly was a pharaoh and that he needed to make haste in his mission to build a pyramid as a final resting place, because pyramids take a long time to build and need many workers to push rocks around, or something like that. This means Harry is now more important than King Charles and all the British royal family combined.”

Initially, Harry consulted the Montecito city council on his plans to build a pyramid about 455 feet tall consisting of 2.3 million blocks of limestone. Each block would weigh around 2.5 tons (2267.96 kilograms). So 2,300,000 x 2267.96 = 5,216,308,000 kilograms (5,750,000 tons) of material would be required.

Unfortunately for Harry, Montecito town councillors told the ‘pharaoh’ that he cannot build a structure like that in the protected area, so now he has gone to Las Vegas where there is a pyramid already, and a possibility for another one to be built.

Meghan Markle was also told that she was the reincarnation of Queen Cleopatra, and immediately called Jadajada Pinky Smithers, who congratulated her on her new-found status as Queen of Africa.

“The couple daily invite many Californian psychics into their home, and Meghan Markle once invited a voodoo priestess from Haiti so that she can cast a horrid spell on Camilla. Yes, they are very open-minded progressive people, and should be applauded for their wonderful sense of energy,” Scooby added.

When Everyone’s Supposedly Famous

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Andy Warhol predicted quite prophetically in the 60s that everyone would have their five minutes of fame in the future. That prophecy has pretty much come true, however the levels of fame have changed drastically and have been watered down somewhat.

Famous on the internet

The internet has made billions of people supposedly famous simply by eradicating privacy and making people more accessible and trackable than ever before. The new generation have taken to the loss of privacy like a duck to water and have never known a world where privacy was a thing people valued very much.

The fickle fleeting fame people find on the internet is a very fluid state of affairs where one minute some influencer or vapid Instagram model may recieve millions of hits and go viral for a minute or so before going back to semi-obscure fame on Ye Olde Internet(s). These dilettantes have to go back to buying more social media followers and paying dodgy sites selling views bot traffic and subscribers. If you have enough money on the internet, you can be really ‘famous’.

Fame does not mean anything if everyone is famous, much like if there was gold everywhere, it would be as valuable as any other ordinary rock. This is why real fame has sort of done a U-turn, and the only people who are left out of the roll call of the internet are the actual famous ones.

If you have a Facebook or Instagram or any other social media page with your real name, you are a compromised individual who is now supposedly ‘famous’, and are now especially known to the millions of shark companies/intelligence agencies/police mining your data, so they can target you better to sell you cheap toxic plastic trinkets from China, or arrest you at three in the morning.

The internet dilutes fame, especially on social media. Now on Twitter, any wanker can buy a blue check mark for $8 per month and be recognised next to some inconsequential rapper or influencer. Your name is next to this guy or girl, it is just a name in a list of billions on the social network, and this is the reason fame is diluted. The worst part of this is when people who acquired fame before the internet come onto a platform, and they start to spill the beans to everyone about their haemorrhoids, or have a hissy fit because they suddenly realise they are just another name in the list of suckers sucked into the data mire of manure, no one has respect for these people ever again. Your previous fame and status have been summarily sucked out of you ass first. With all mystery and enigmatic fame ruined on social media, many previously famous people are thus reduced to nothing but being another Joe or Jill talking about their toenails or some other personal detail that no one wants to know. As for your opinions? No one cares because it is all data swimming around a big fucking vacuous bowl. You see that, skip that, see another bit, skip to another piece of info, all completed in seconds. With people now having their brains altered via the internet, there is little or no patience, which filters into real life as well. Things, tasks, have to be completed immediately, and as for traffic on the roads, woe betide you if you don’t move away from the lights quick enough.

When everyone’s famous, the truly valuable people are the one’s out of the list or are anonymous. They are the rare commodity, the valuable rare diamond or bar of pure gold worth something more than the others. Supply and Demand.

A Beautiful Moment to Lighten Up Your Day

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Sometimes it’s good to share a delightful clip or two on the internets, and this is what we are doing today on the Squib. This is a beautiful moment in time, encapsulated in glorious detail, that will have you smiling all day.

The joyous episode was captured somewhere in California, a state run by people who pass silly laws that benefit no one, and contribute to the misery of millions of folks who are unfortunate enough to live there. These idiots even plan on bringing out a new law which will make it illegal to stop shoplifters.

To see instances of such immediate justice meted out with such fervour is truly a glorious beauteous sight, and even though there will be many ‘progressives’ or should we call the pompous arseholes ‘regressives’, who will not appreciate the sheer beauty and passion of this moment and will whimper into their handkerchiefs — fuck them.

 

View this post on Instagram

 

A post shared by 5 element phd (@yo_folkers)

Trump Hired Convict to Help Train Him For Prison

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First rule of prison, don’t bend over to pick up the soap in the showers. Second rule of prison, you gotta be hard, otherwise you get a beat down and become someone’s bitch. These are some of the rules Donald Trump has been learning from convicted murderer Kayshaun ‘crazy eye’ Bubba Johnsons Esquire, 64, who has practically lived his entire life in prison.

Donald is a man on borrowed time, as the radical socialist Democrats are out to get him out of the election race by having him arrested and put in jail. What better way of winning an election by having your opponents jailed on trumped-up nonsensical charges worthy of a Banana Republic?

“Yeah, I trained da man. In prison, people go in and some never get released or are murdered. Every day, we studied different scenarios that could mean the difference between life or death. The guards don’t give a shit man, some even take bets on what happens to people. I seen one new boy, he didn’t last a week before they caught that little chicken in the showers.”

It’s a good thing Trump can still organise his election campaign even from his prison cell, and the ongoing civil war that will no doubt ensue after the Democrat judges convict him for 540 years.

What country before ever existed a century and half without a rebellion? And what country can preserve its liberties if their rulers are not warned from time to time that their people preserve the spirit of resistance? Let them take arms. The remedy is to set them right as to facts, pardon and pacify them. What signify a few lives lost in a century or two? The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. It is its natural manure. – Thomas Jefferson

The court hearings will not be televised, unfortunately for Trump, who would play up to the cameras to great effect.

U.S. Politicised Biased Weaponised Sham Trials

  1. Democrat judge
  2. Democrat jury
  3. Democrat state
  4. Democrat politicised judicial system
  5. Democrat media bias

All in all, this is a sad day for America, not only was there fraud committed during the 2020 election, but the entire illiberal woke bureaucratic system is weaponised against Trump and his followers with witch hunt after witch hunt.

Meanwhile, Hunter Biden and his dad are laughing their asses off as they get special treatment and are allowed to get away with major instances of corporate corruption, drugs, illegal trafficked prostitution, and all the other shit.

Whatever happens with the biased punitive indictments, Trump is up for 2024 election, in or out of jail.

Labour Preparing to Win Election – What Can We Expect?

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The current Tory Party makeup is a gift that keeps giving to the Labour Party. Some people have seen their mortgage payments rise by over 90% in the last few months, as despair and tragedy fall over millions of Britons struggling for even basic needs. When a loaf of bread in some shops in London are priced at over £6, and it costs £450 to fill up your car, there is not much hope, especially when your mortgage costs have increased by over £5,000 per month.

The oblivious Tories have somehow gone weirdly socialist by putting up tax on absolutely everything, and heavy taxation is usually the territory of the Labour Party. With some kind of weird switch, the Labour Party are now talking about lowering taxes. What the fuck is going on here?

When it comes to charisma and leadership, Rishi Sunak has as much chutzpah as an old leather sole. His Chancellor, Jeremy Hunt is basically a cunt. There is no other way of describing this Scrooge who has brought on so much pain onto ordinary Britons. The remainer entrenched Bank of England is also a faeces ridden den of uselessness and complete idiotic incompetence. The BoE chief has probably never read a book, let alone read one on economics. With all of these nasty variables mixing around in a festering soup of shit, things are getting worse daily, and there is nothing anyone can do about it.

socialist utopia hyperinflation

We all know what will happen when Labour gets in, things will suddenly lighten up as Comrade Starmer and his crew of miscreants pull the wool over people’s eyes. Yay, everything is okay now the Tories are gone, but in all certainty it will all be a pack of lies. Britain will be on a sure-fire race to the bottom of the barrel as Labour brings out the old socialist cheque book of free money. Look what happened when socialist Chancellor Sunak brought out the cheque book during the farcical Pandemic. This country is now so bankrupt it will soon be asking the taxpayer to empty their already bank accounts to help the ruined state’s coffers. Could be a bail-in, or some other scheme so that the robber barons can keep their duck houses. The Great Reset and Net Zero or some other tinpot socialist project which will collectivise all wealth and redistribute equally in misery for all. If only Britain still had its gold reserves, which were unceremoniously sold off at the bottom of the market for a pittance by Labour’s Gordon Brown when he was Chancellor.

Naturally, Labour winning the election will be the final death knell for a Brexit that never actually happened. It will also mean that useless socialist projects will become even more pronounced as taxpayers see their money spent on things like funding transexual lesbian amputee ballet dancers from Zimbabwe and giving council house scrotes free safari trips to ensure they will continue offending and dealing drugs. We will also see another explosion in a Stasi surveillance state, much the same when Bliar came to power.

Now, there is little difference between the Tory Party and the Labour Party. They are both populated solely by socialist remainers intent on burying Britain under more debt, inflation and interest rate rises. The Tories let in more migrants than Labour ever hoped to, and the armed forces have pitiful funding, having been reduced over subsequent years to a pitiful force not fit to fight for more than three days at tops.

What can you expect when you can’t even differentiate between the two main political parties? The key of course is that people should vote with their feet, and not vote at the polls. If millions of Britons stayed at home on election day, and there was absolutely no result for any party, this would possibly send a message to the morons in charge, but they are so deluded and out of touch, they probably would not even realise what had happened.

The Tories have lost the vote already, and there is absolutely no point in even campaigning. All of this nonsense is just an exercise in nihilism and the worst part of it is that the Tories are completely blind to how their actions and ill-fated, ill planned policies have caused their own downfall. Conversely, maybe they are all suicidal and have planned this out as a clever ruse to lose the election. Whatever it is, we are all fucked because of these deluded shysters and their unmerited arrogance.

Nulli sunt caeciores videre nolentibus…

Exclusive: Harry and Meghan Reveal Where They Will Move Next

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Harry and Meghan, the wayward drifters and grifters who have fooled simple Americans into thinking they are somehow important, even fooling Spotify executives to hand over $19 million, are said to be unhappy in their 16 bathroom Montecito faux palace (McMansion).

Ovid Scoobie, the couple’s spokesperson, has revealed on his blog that the duo are house hunting in a place that not many have considered.

baghdad beverly hills shopping

“I can happily announce that my beloved dear couple, Harry and Meghan will be moving to Iraq in the Fall. They have already secured a 20 bathroom place directly in the Sunni Triangle, in Baghdad. On a recent trip to the area, the couple immediately fell in love with the place, and it even has a large torture chamber in the basement. You know, if they catch a paparazzo, or maybe they can use it to torture contracts out of Netflix executives.”

On further inspection, reporters for the Sun revealed that the building was formerly a secret palace for Uday Hussein, one of Saddam’s evil sons, before he was killed in a shoot-out.

“There is faux gold furniture everywhere, and when Meghan saw that she squealed in abject delight, because as a fake personality herself, she adores fake things. The bullet holes in the walls can easily be plastered over and the deceased individuals in the torture chamber will be dumped in the street where the stray dogs will clean everything up,” Scoobie added.

baghdad kids
There are plenty of activities in the area for the kids.

Harry and Meghan of course want the best for their kids and when they saw the Sunni Triangle they immediately fell in love with the place. There are plenty of opportunities for kids to play and be educated in the local religious schools. What used to be called IED Alley by the U.S. troops is now a pleasant dusty road with gutted out Hummers and downed Blackhawk choppers. This is where all the Iraqi children play now, and sometimes they dig up a treasure trove of articles left behind by the Americans. Only last week, a group of children uncovered an M60 machine gun and cache of grenades. It was fireworks time for those kids.

baghdad security

The Sunni Triangle zone has plenty of amenities and opportunities for family fun. Every May, is the starting of shooting season, where indiscriminate sectarian mass shootings occur. In this free-for-all, many are severely or fatally injured, but it’s all part of the fun of the area. Since the Americans left Iraq, the level of anarchy has increased by over 80% and kidnappings are a daily activity many criminal gangs and jihadists subscribe to.

It’s a long way from Montecito or Windsor, but it will do for now.

Sunak Pulls a Pint of Pure Tax

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“That will be £18.56 please,” a jubilant Rishi Sunak, the unelected autocrat who is the current shoo in Tory PM, said as he pulled a pint for a reporter at a beer festival where he was viciously heckled by attendees.

Increasing tax on everything, including the price of a pint is considered a good election winning tactic by the current socialist Tory remainers, but for everyone else in the country, it is going to be a sure-fire Labour winner.

“Imagine buying a round of drinks for your mates at your local. I can’t afford £20 for a pint because the Tories are taxing everything to death, let alone a round of drinks,” one pub dweller revealed.

The Tory tax hikes could possibly be the final round on pubs as a whole as customers desert them and opt for other avenues to sate their alcohol needs.

“I am making my own beer and gin at home now. It’s the only way I can afford to have a drink,” another former pub goer revealed.

The clueless Tories are thus cruising blindly and casually for a solid beating at the coming General Election, but the thing is these people are not Tories anymore, they are something completely different, and this is why many former Tory voters are abandoning the party in droves. The only other reasonable explanation for this madness is that the Tories are actively working to lose the election on purpose.

Take your heavily taxed pint Sunak and shove it up your fucking arse. If you can’t see you have lost already, you are not only completely deluded but blind as a bat.

The Daily Squib’s Political Satire: Defending Freedom of Speech Against Totalitarianism and the Right to Offend

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In an increasingly interconnected world, the right to freedom of speech and the right to offend have become hotly debated topics. Philosophers and thinkers throughout history, like John Stuart Mill, Voltaire, and Thomas Paine, have fervently argued for the importance of free expression as a cornerstone of democracy. In today’s context, the Daily Squib, one of the top political satire sites in the UK, embodies the spirit of these ideals. Through its satirical comedy and fearless commentary, the Daily Squib stands as a bulwark against totalitarian ideologies and a champion of free speech, highlighting the significance of upholding democratic values in a Western society teetering on the edge of authoritarianism.

The Importance of Freedom of Speech and the Right to Offend

John Stuart Mill, was an English philosopher, political economisJohn Stuart Mill, in his seminal work “On Liberty,” eloquently articulated the necessity of freedom of speech. Mill emphasized that the free exchange of ideas, even those deemed offensive or controversial, is vital for societal progress and individual intellectual growth. Similarly, Voltaire’s (François-Marie Arouet) famous sentiment, “I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it,” attributed to Evelyn Beatrice Hall in 1919 encapsulates the essence of the right to offend, underscoring the significance of protecting everyone’s right to express their opinions, regardless of societal sensibilities.

Thomas Paine, a Founding Father of the United States, believed in the power of free expression as a crucial mechanism for political dissent and change. These philosophical ideals find resonance in the principles upheld by the political satire of the Daily Squib, where satire becomes a vehicle for challenging authority and speaking truth to power.

The Daily Squib’s Political Satire: A Defender of Free Speech Against Totalitarian Regimes

Cancel CultureIn a world where totalitarian regimes seek to silence dissident voices, the Daily Squib emerges as a fearless proponent of free speech and satire. Totalitarianism thrives on suppressing dissent and stifling opposing viewpoints, but platforms like the Daily Squib refuse to bow to such oppressive tactics. Instead, the Squib employs satire as a potent tool to lampoon political figures, Big Tech, woke ideology and parties, fearlessly criticizing their actions and policies.

Drawing inspiration from historical figures like John Milton, who ardently defended freedom of the press in his work “Areopagitica,” the Daily Squib challenges the very essence of totalitarianism. The site provides a haven for expression, encouraging a diverse range of perspectives and satirical humour that keeps authority figures on their toes. By championing satire as an essential element of free expression, the Daily Squib empowers its readers to question authority, demand transparency, and actively engage in political discourse.

Political Satire as a deterrent against totalitarianism

40% OFF dactylic hexameter political satireThe Juvenalian political satire of the Daily Squib has been at the forefront of satirical commentary, unapologetically taking on totalitarian ideologies like wokism and their attempts to stifle freedom of speech. After a poll revealing that much of Generation Z are in favour of cancelling free speech and rejected the right to privacy, the Daily Squib responded with an article titled “Calling For Less Freedom – Generation Z.” In this piece, the Squib warned of the severe dangers set by an entire generation brainwashed to become radicalised wokist censorious soviet automatons.

Additionally, the Daily Squib did not shy away from criticizing the rise of wokism and the erosion of free speech under the guise of ‘equality’. One article, titled “The Delightful Joys of Being Woke: A Hilarious Journey into the Land of Soviet Awareness,” humorously exposed the excesses of sovietized wokism and the chilling effect it can have on open dialogue.

The Daily Squib’s unwavering commitment to freedom of speech, right to offend, and upholding democratic values mirrors the ideals championed by renowned Western philosophers and thinkers throughout history. By fearlessly challenging totalitarian regimes, criticizing oppressive measures, and using satire as a powerful tool for change, the Daily Squib stands as a staunch defender of democracy. In a world where the right to free expression faces increasing threats, platforms like the Daily Squib remind us of the enduring power of satire and its role in safeguarding our fundamental democratic principles.

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Experts: There Are Aliens Amongst Us

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Extra terrestrial beings are most probably among us, and are actively influencing human thought and actions through powerful telepathic means, is the conclusion from several experts from an unnamed clandestine agency.

@tuckystrike WATCH THIS CREEPY MAN!!! Why does he behave like that??!! #fyp #creepy ♬ Creepy simple horror ambient(1270589) – howlingindicator

“Certainly there is evidence of extra terrestrial entities masquerading as humans, and of controlling human minds through telepathic means.

“The human mind is weak compared to some of the beings who visit this planet, and thus humans are easy prey to these entities. You may not believe any of this as it may be too fantastic for your limited world view and your limited intelligence, however humans can only perceive a very limited spectrum of bandwidth information. Humans are severely limited not only in eyesight, hearing, touch sense, but in telepathy. The universal bandwidth of information is vast, and humans can only see a tiny portion of what is available.

“U.S. Air Force intelligence officer David Grusch revealed in a recent Congressional hearing that the government has recovered alien beings in downed craft, and this alone gives some credence to the fact that there are extra terrestrials among us.

“Some of them can inhabit human bodies, or control humans from afar through mind control. It is possible that some of the aliens are shape-shifters, however they only have a limited time to hold human form. Some of the aliens are not friendly to humans, and are actively working at some times to harm humans.

“UAP craft are being held by United States clandestine black projects, mainly for the purpose of back engineering the advanced technology. Antigravity craft technology could revolutionise human civilisation, however this information is being suppressed by the U.S. government upper echelons because the time is not right to introduce such tech.”