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Obama's American Dream a Mirage

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After telling the American people that the ‘American Dream’ is a mirage created by the US Government, President Obama is living proof that the ‘American Dream’ never existed in the first place or ever will.

“What is the American Dream? It is the national ethos of the United States. Where citizens of the United States, irrespective of social class or birth, have the freedom and opportunities to create career and business success, as well as prosperity for themselves and their families. Hard work in American society is supposedly rewarded with upward social mobility,” Harvard professor of business, Dr. Sean Lementswell, told the New York Times

How much does the state have a hand in a single American’s success?

According to Obama, the government contributes everything to the success of those in America who are deemed as living the ‘American Dream’.

Obama is the living proof that the state is omnipresent in every facet of American life.

“Who put him in power? First of all, who is Obama? No one really knows that apart from a few people in a darkened room somewhere, maybe in the Pentagon. Obama did not get to where he is by the ideals of the American Dream, he was put in place by very powerful people with a specific agenda. We do not even have an answer to Obama’s Connecticut social security number, or his citizenship or anything else. Everything about this guy is made up. He appeared out of nowhere in the 2008 elections. No one knew who he was, all they saw was the colour of his skin. That’s it!” Albert Finklestein, a political commentator in Washington told the Washington Herald.

When Obama is re-elected in November 2012, he will not be living the American Dream then either, because the people who will put him back in power will know very well of how they completed their mission.

AnaCondi: "I'm Back!"

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When Condi walks into a room, you freeze, she has a power about her that makes your spine seize up and you start stuttering madly trying to get your words out. She is certainly elegant as she slithers in between the furniture, and even though she may seem mild mannered at first, one look from her vertical pupils and you know there is not one inch of compassion in those cold reptilian eyes.

“I seen Condi, you know, kind of shape shift sometimes. She is a similar to Hillary Clinton but more deadly. If you blink, you would miss it, but look into her eyes and you will realise that her soul is very different to that of a human’s. This is no David Icke bullshit or Alex Jones selling products shit, this is real. Condi is not human. You look at the eyes folks, they’re the window of the soul. They can try and disguise their true selves as much as they want but if you can see the real deal, you will know what to look for,” Albert Eisentorfler, a conspiracy researcher told UFO Weekly magazine.

What will the global consequences be if Condi is appointed as the new Vice President of the United States? Who knows-s-s-s-s?

Preparations Nearly Complete For London Olympics

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“We’ve got the anti-aircraft guns, missiles, tanks and snipers all ready. AWACS, attack helicopters, nuclear subs and approximately 300 regiments of SAS soldiers on standby, as well as the SBS, Marines and Paratroopers. We also have teams of secret MI6 and MI5 agents all over the place, listening devices, cameras and early warning systems. The games are going to be brilliant,” a 2012 Olympic official told the BBC.

The Olympic venues all have steel enforced concrete walls around the perimeter and guarded look out posts with 50 caliber machine gun turrets.

“The additional electric fencing around the moat, which will be filled with crocodiles shipped over from Africa, may add an extra deterrent to anyone who even thinks about lighting an e-cigarette,” Colonel Jensen Ingrams, in charge of 364 Battalion, stationed above the long jump pit, told Channel 4 news this morning.

General McChrystal: Why Bringing Back the Draft Will Boost US Economy

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One must look at the modus operandi of the former Afghanistan General. He says it is important for all Americans to be drafted into the military at the age of 18 so as to share the burden of the global wars currently being orchestrated from Washington. Could an increased military zap the US economy into overdrive and lift it up into new heights? Yes it could, because with increased army personnel comes increased industry, arms manufacturing, logistics, training, catering, filing and every other job that you can think of. Armies are wonderful employers, and what do you do when everyone is unemployed and moping around the streets, like America’s youth today? You start a few more wars, then you enlist the youth and train them to kill Islamic people or whoever the next enemy of the US is.

The current globalist agenda in the Middle East is moving far too slowly for those who have started and controlled the conflicts.

“We want to finish the cleansing of the Middle East. It is in our global interest to make the Islamic countries fall into line with the West and the only way to do this is to destabilise these countries either through war or propaganda,” a Pentagon insider revealed.

The conflict in Syria is the final point of no return for the US military machine, because it is buttressed between the Russians and Chinese. If both Russian and China were to enter into a war with the US, there would definitely be a need for conscription. As for Iran, once Syria capitulates to the West, that will be attacked in a similar fashion — by the use of guerrilla forces funded by America, and then a final push either through bombing through the air or limited ground troops, maybe both.

The ‘Arab Spring’ destabilised the region through propaganda, and the next phase will have to be military conflict, which is a messy business, but is the only way to fully eradicate any dissent towards America plus win further territories for the global elite.

“War is good for business. Not only do we reduce the civilian populations but we increase our production and manufacturing business within the US. We make great weapons, amazing missiles and hardcore tanks. When the draft is brought in, we will have a booming economy once again, we will fight as one nation, and our young boys will become men. Nothing like a bullet whizzing past your head to make you really grow up. No more Playstation or X Box for you guys, from now on you will have the real thing and you will thank me for it as you stand to attention to salute me,” General McChristal told a group of school kids at a Florida High School yesterday.

While the Americans want a bloated military, how come the UK is cutting its own ranks? Who is disarming the British military and why? Perhaps someone should ask Brussels about it.

Gordon Brown Wants to Come Back to Lead Labour at Next Election

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“The world needs saving, and I’m the man to do it. I saved the world three or four times during my reign as supreme leader in chief, and i can do it again. Every day I come up with new exciting ways to save the planet, unlike my former friend Tony who is too busy being a corporate whore. What about the current leader of the Labour party? The little boy, I could crush him with my fist, he is weak, weak, weak,” Mr Brown was overheard saying to his PR adviser on a flight from Dubai last week.

All over Westminster, the news is out. Could Gordo be making a comeback? If so, how will he take out the main players who are in the ring at the moment?

“I can’t wait to see the great clunking beast’s fist dragging along the blood splattered floors of Westminster once again. Gordon is a political behemoth, a man who has vengeance in his eye as he turns his stare back towards posh weakling Cammo and the one who betrayed him, Nick Clegg. Gordon is the only one who has the brute force to kill the Coalition once and for all,” a Westminster political commentator told the BBC.

Oh Dear, Two Months of Rain Every Day For Rest of Year

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“Sometimes we might get three months of rain in one day, or maybe four,” BBC weatherman Michael Haddock, said on the BBC news today.

If there is one months rain on one day, and three months of rain on another day, it is quite conceivable that there can be five months of rain on all days of the week.

“You may start off with one month of rain falling within the first fifteen minutes of the day, that then tapers off bringing six months of rain in the space of twenty five minutes on the next day, and then it’s an additional eight months of rain if you add on the next day’s rainfall, then average it off to the median number. If we add on the next month’s figures after all the daily months of rain have fallen we get a new figure for months of rain. That slowly increases by two or three monthly rain increments or whatever the next f*cking soundbite is,” Mr Haddock said.

This means there should be more rain forecast soon.

Music Biz Autotune Songs Now Used to Torture Inmates in Secret CIA Centres

It is very hard to distinguish singers in the year 2012 as all vocals are put through autotune and the vocoder processors reducing their warbles to a machine made gloop of degenerative detritous.

“Listen to ten songs from ten different artists in 2012 and there is no distinction in vocal style, sound or inflection. It is only after you see these so-called artists you realise that they are different people albeit wearing the same type of clothes,” a former recording executive for Warner Bros record company told Media Week magazine.

Well, it may be a sad end to music lovers in today’s current music scene, but it is a massive gain for the CIA.

A new Pentagon report has revealed that the CIA, based in Virginia, have found a use for the music of today — to torture Islamic fighters into revealing everything they know.

“We found that the sound of autotuned vocals going through the vocoder process is infinitely more annoying than a group of mosquitoes buzzing around your f*cking head at three in the morning. You put some Arab in a room and stick some headphones on his head, pipe this pop crap through them and you get results fast. Forget waterboarding, this shit works. We had that Dick Cheney guy in last week, he may be retired but he likes to come along sometimes, says it reminds him of the old days. Well, we showed him the headphone trick and seeing that Arab goat herder singing like a canary brought a tear to his eye. He loved it and said we should carry on doing more of this stuff,” a CIA operative revealed.

The CIA is now using the groundbreaking torture techniques all over the world at secret CIA installations where torture is permissible.

Boris Johnson Get Me to the Beach On Time

The race resembled something out of Top Gear, but without the fake jocular bottom sniffing bravado, as the London Mayor and Vince Cable set off to a very special practice session at The O2.

When Bo Jo gets a snifter of beach volleyball quim, you’ll have to hold him back with brute force. He was off like lightning, first on foot, then a Boris bike, then a Boris cable car.

As for Vince Cable, he didn’t take the cable, he took the more traditional route of the heavily trafficked stinky roads in his Mini.

Well, no doubt the saucy hostess top totty in the cable car was a much welcome sight to Boris as he was lifted high up over London on the way to the Olympic venue in the new cable cars.

While Boris was getting his eyes washed with some serious eye candy at the women’s beach volleyball, poor old Vince, sans cable, was back in an unbusiness meeting in his car dreaming about telling bankers to stop all that banking lark.

Good on you Boris.

NHS Doctors Want More Money For Telling You to Get Out After Three Minute Consultations

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An appointment with a doctor lasts an average of 3.5 minutes according to new statistics released by the Health Secretary today.

However, new government legislation is aiming to increase patient to doctor times by thirty seconds, leading to a mass demonstration and strike action for GPs.

The doctors’ revolt could hit surgeries across the length and breadth of Britain, with thousands of doctors angry at the new increased patient listening time proposal.

“Instead of kicking the patient out after three and a half minutes, they want us to wait a further thirty seconds. I can’t take it anymore, I can’t listen to another patient talking about their ailments, aaargh, aaargh, aaargh!” one of the distraught doctors, told LBC radio’s, James Minnow today.

Another angry GP said: “If I have to listen to a patient for thirty more seconds than is needed I want a huge increase in pension as well as salary. If not, we’re striking every day until everything is restored.”

Boris Johnson and David Cameron Attend Opening of Greco-Roman Olympic Wrestling Venue

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Boris Johnson, who studied the Classics at Oxford, stood up before the opening of the new wrestling venue to give a brief historic outline of Greco-Roman wrestling.

Much to everyone’s surprise, the London mayor and PM decided to also give a hands-on demonstration of the different styles of wrestling.

The London 2012 Olympic competition consists of two styles – Greco-Roman, where athletes use their upper bodies and arms only, and Freestyle, where athletes can use any part of their bodies.

Wrestling was one of the first sporting disciplines to be added to the Olympic Games in 700 B.C. This event was also part of the pentathlon. Wrestling was regarded as the best expression of strength out of all of the competitions and was represented in Greek mythology by Heracles.

“Boris and David Cameron were brilliant. They showed us how to do Greco-Roman wrestling as well as Freestyle. It’s great to see politicians getting into the Olympic spirit like that,” Julien Offal, a member of the audience at the ExCeL told the BBC.

A total of 344 wrestlers will compete across 18 medal events. These include seven Greco-Roman events for men and 11 Freestyle events, including seven for men and four for women.