“This art hits you in the face — literally. All I saw was a pile of knocked out gallery visitors on the floor,” a bruised Jenny Metcalf, art critic for the Evening Standard wrote in her column.
The installation was acquired by Saatchi last year and the new exhibition entitled ‘Brute’ will be running until December 12.
If you don’t want to get knocked out maybe bring a crash helmet.
“It is a small step in the right direction for the U.S., they have sacrificed a national monument to pay their debt to us. Geologists have found vast copper deposits below the statues of the former presidents which will be destroyed then the area will be transformed into a large copper mine,” Chinese foreign ministry spokesperson, Hua Chunying told the Xinhua state news agency Monday.
One of the reasons for the U.S. Government shutdown was the enormous debt president Obama has partially created, so this new Mount Rushmore sale will appease America’s debtors a little bit.
State department officials are looking at more parts of America to sell to China, and a proposed list will be submitted to Congress in November.
“It’s a case of what we can lose and do without so we can carry on borrowing from the Chinese. Look at it as a big pawn shop, we sell our most treasured assets and monuments today, and one day we might get them back. In the case of Mount Rushmore, that sadly won’t be the case as it will be dynamited to get to the copper resources, but other monuments and National Parks that are to be sold will still be in the U.S,” David Grant, State department spokesman told CNN.
Treasury officials were today quiet as to how much the sale of Mount Rushmore would raise, some independent experts estimating as much as $600 million.
“We got ’em. They’re going to jail for a very long time. We can’t have miscreants like this messing up my country,” the president said after a round of golf.
Local police forces rounded up the geriatric war veterans and threw them in police vans to be taken to local police stations for processing. News agencies reported at least 300 American war veterans were arrested.
“We got to get these criminals off the streets. They’re a danger to society,” police sergeant Trayvon Johnsons told CNN.
A group of criminal pensioner veterans dared to try and visit memorials for fallen fellow soldiers today.
Thankfully, Stasi agents were on hand to beat the miscreant opposers of the supreme comrade in chief within an inch of their lives.
Some of the veterans were in wheel chairs and some were obviously struggling to walk with their crutches but thankfully the Stasi and riot police used batons and tear gas to neutralise the obvious threat.
“Did you see how that 80-year-old veteran of Iwo Jima went down when I cracked him on the skull with my baton?” laughing Stasi commissar, Barry Soto told state news service, MSN.
Comrade Obama, today praised the violent shutdown: “Citizens and comrades of the Soviet Democratic Republic of America. We have violently cracked down on the vile elderly traitor veterans who fought for the previous capitalist entity the United States and have somehow seen fit to reemerge from their hovels. I would like to thank the rest of the coward population who stayed at home and watched the beatings of these elderlies who chose to disobey my supreme command. You did the right thing, you must obey my every order, you cowardly yellow stained maggots.”
Comrade Obama is pleased by the progress in the SDRA and has ordered extra rations of chocolate for all compliant citizens who stayed at home. Thank you for your continuing support.
The president and his family who depends on their EBT card had to contend with a furious wife when she went to her local K-Mart and was refused groceries for the White House kitchen on Saturday.
Michelle Obama told local news sources that she was not very happy about the situation.
“What ma gonna do? I gots me to go EBT shopping and the dumbass back home forgot to pay the gaddamn bills for the EBT processing center wherever the hell that may be? We got one corned beef can left. That good fo’ nothin’ idiot couldn’t organizize a cup of coffee in a coffee factory!”
Over 100 million Americans, including the White House, depend on their EBT cards every day to feed themselves.
In the brief pamphlet discovered under a pile of unread Obamacare manuals there may be some insight into how the American Empire was eventually lost.
“The United States Empire of the twenty first century A.D. extended entirely across North America, including large swathes of South America, the Middle East and parts of South East Asia, Eurasia, Turkey, Israel, Egypt, and North Africa. The American Empire had been extended through military superiority as well as economic might during its heyday.
America was engaged in military skirmishes with the tribes in the Middle East in order to gain oil rich lands to run their 5 MPG SUVs back home. Strong presidents occasionally extended the empire while weak presidents tended to lose those lands. The largest organised rival of the Americans was the Persian Empire to the east. The Persians were the political descendants of the Parthians and successfully resisted American invasions countless times.
The American Empire had existed as an important power for over 60 years. They had installed military bases in over 50 countries, and American troops in over 150 nations around the globe. They had saturated the world with their entertainment and ideals, as well as enjoyed the benefits of being the predominant world currency thus giving them carte blanche to spend as they pleased from the spoils of their conquests.
All was not perfect, however. Presidents held absolute authority. This worked well with good presidents, but incompetent ones could do great harm. The rules for succession to the throne were never clear, and debilitating civil wars often resulted. The bureaucracy that managed the empire on a daily basis grew more corrupt, increasing the dissatisfaction of the common citizen. The wealth of the empire gradually concentrated in the hands of a minority while a large slave taxpayer population did all the work. The borders of the empire were immense and put a strain on military resources (500,000 soldiers defended a frontier that required 3 million or more to be secured). American conquests had ceased by 2015 A.D., bringing an end to massive inflows of plunder and stolen resources. Taxes increased and production fell as the work force declined. A plague may have killed 60 percent of the empire’s population from 2020-2025 A.D., further reducing trade and production.
By 2026, the American Empire was split into eastern and western halves in an attempt to make for easier rule and better control. In the latter part of 2027 after a brutal civil war had decimated much of the United States, there were now two presidents, one in the seceded South and one in the North of the mainland. The American Empire, now severely weakened by division and war was then ripe for attack by the barbarian hordes from the east and South America.”
The recovered pamphlet then seems to end abrubtly, with pages ripped out. The historians who are trying to piece together what happened to the former United States are still sifting through the rubble to find more clues.
“Comrades! I stand here in the Soviet White House and I look down on you the brave people, the workers, the furloughed workers at home, and most of all the enemies and terrorists who are trying to derail the 5-year-plan for health collectivization. For those enemies of my supreme command, I say this to you. We will go ahead with our plan whether you like it or not. We will crush you with our sheer will. We will decimate you in your fox holes. We will hunt you down like the animals you are then force you to watch Obamacare educational videos so you may be re-educated. If you refuse, we will simply shoot you. No one or anything will stop my resolve in implementing Obamacare,” Comrade Obama told a cheering crowd of three dedicated Obamamite supporters outside the Soviet White House on Friday.
Comrade Obama and Commissar Reid have declared every day in the SDRA to be a celebration of Obamacare.
“Citizens of the Soviet Democratic Republic of America, you will be rewarded by death panels where there will be a lottery on who lives and dies from Obamacare. Additionally, all citizens’ previously private medical records will be harvested and distributed to any State department or employer that requests them. By signing up to Obamacare, your IP address will be logged and recorded so all citizens of the SDRA will enjoy the safety of knowing that their every thought is tracked. We reserve the right to increase the Obamacare taxation at any time, and if you cannot pay, you will be fined or imprisoned in a FEMA camp somewhere in Utah. In the future, we will require all Obamacare recipients to have RFID chips implanted in their bodies, for their own safety and health. Remember, that this is all for your own good. Thank you for not voting for this, we are implementing it whether you like it or not.”
“The Dems are now less popular than cockroaches and hemorrhoids. That don’t give chief Democratic madam, Hillary Clinton much chance of ever getting voted in. It’s no news that those two despise each other with a vengeance, so Obama is using the old socialist scorched earth policy before he leaves office possibly with a big boot in his behind,” a Congressional insider told the Washington Daily Echo.
Britain’s Labour party adopted the same policy before they were ousted after thirteen long years. When they realised they did not have a chance of reelection, they cynically drew up a scorched earth policy where expenditure went through the roof, and their corrupt crony members pocketed as much cash as they could muster before leaving nothing in the nation’s coffers. Britain is still recovering now after their disastrous tenure, America however may not recover. There are two very good reasons to this. America is such a large nation that if it takes the wrong track, it is harder to steer back. Britain is just a minnow compared to the behemoth Federal monster that America is. Secondly, the world has changed while America’s insular compartmentalised system has been reamed by the socialist jackals. No longer is America the world force it used to be, it has been marginalised and weakened by wars on three fronts as well as a war inside Washington.
Obama stole the election from Hillary Clinton in 2008, and his actions now will ensure the Republicans get into power again for a very long time in 2016.
“The Dow and S&P went through the roof yesterday but you might still have a chance to catch some momentum — for another six weeks that is,” Marty Rich, a trading expert told Bloomberg news yesterday.
Another investment expert told news crews outside Wall Street: “You don’t want to get caught selling stock with a six week extension. Buy, buy, buy! But please don’t think about what happens after the six week extension is up.”
Finance experts are advising everyone to buy. Just do it and don’t think about anything else.
Chicago resident, Jim Beamer, 62, was trying to sign on to the Obamacare web site for the twenty eighth time when his heart went into cardiac arrest. His wife Dorreen, 59, was very upset about the whole episode.
“He kept trying and trying and trying. Then he went blue and started cussing which was totally out of character for him. Finally he just fell onto the computer screen. He never got that Obamacare.”
Widowed Mrs Beamer, being a good Democrat, says she forgives Obamacare for the untimely death of her husband.
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