17.7 C
London
Friday, October 18, 2024
secret satire society
Home Blog Page 3

Is the Future of Gaming Going to Be on Mobile?

2

Over the last decade, gaming has become a mobile affair.

In the past, gamers stuck to their preferred consoles or PCs. However, starting in the 2010s, advances made in smartphone technology saw a new horizon expand—one in which casual mobile gaming would excel. For the first time in history, non-gamers could find more relaxed titles to suit their interests.

For years, the number of casual games available in the Apple App and Google Play stores proliferated. Some releases were duds, while others gained cult followings. Slowly but surely, smartphones began to take over a larger share of the gaming industry.

Today, mobile gaming is the largest sector of the global industry. But could the future of gaming actually shift toward mobile play? Or will mobile gaming serve a supporting role in the more competitive gaming world? Let’s take a closer look.

Casual Gaming Won’t Move from Mobile

Mobile gaming took over for one key reason: the rise of casual and hyper-casual games. This covers a massive range of titles that console and PC games typically don’t cover. For example, casino games are more popularly played on mobile devices, including hits like roulette.

Fans of roulette can play via a web browser to access platforms like PokerStars Casino—or they can download the mobile app. The mobile app is the preferred choice in most cases. Along with casino games, other casual hits include puzzles, word games, and simulations.

Because these games are played on the go and usually for shorter gaming sessions, they’re geared toward mobile—and that isn’t likely to change. In other words, the mobile takeover is mostly applicable to casual and hyper-casual games.

A Question of Connectivity

Another reason why mobile isn’t likely to take over the competitive gaming world is challenges related to connectivity. The rise of mobile gaming correlates to the roll-out of 5G networks, which have helped make mobile gaming more seamless. That being said, at a larger and more competitive level, the average smartphone can’t handle a gaming-caliber connection.

This is likely to change in the future as 6G networks become a reality. However, it’s unlikely that Wi-Fi will be able to compete with the reliability of the networks used in competitive console and PC gaming circuits. Without that connectivity, competitive gaming simply can’t evolve.

pexels-photo-1092644-1

Challenges for Gameplay, Mechanics, & Controls

The most obvious challenge for mobile gaming is its limited controls. Most mobile gamers are working with a small touchscreen, which greatly limits the types of mechanics, gameplay, and controls that developers use. And that prevents mobile gaming from becoming more immersive for players.

Immersive elements aside, the mobile gaming experience simply hasn’t evolved to hammer out these technical obstacles. Even the most advanced and gaming-centric smartphones on the market face challenges related to the hardware. A smaller device, it seems, greatly limits its gaming potential.

On top of that, the fragmented nature of gaming has created challenges for developers. Many of the titles available for competitive mobile play are also available for console and PC. Players who want to compete at the highest level and go pro are likely to swap out their smartphones for a more competitive piece of hardware.

A Perception of Quality

One of the most pervasive challenges for mobile developers is the idea that mobile games aren’t as high quality as console and PC releases. Once again, this points back to the hardware in use. Smartphones are smaller and, even when geared toward gaming, must fulfil other purposes.

In other words, in terms of quality and gameplay, mobile games are still regarded as more casual and less impactful. While indie mobile games have earned global acclaim thanks to their unique premises, they’re often working against the perception that mobile games are inferior.

Until mobile game developers are able to create releases that are as competitive as they are innovative, that’s not likely to change. However, with hits like Garena Free Fire gaining a global following, that future might be more within reach than previously thought.

Probably the Best Video Channel On YouTube Right Now

2

There’s something supremely satisfying about watching a video of a fake old man with a walker bending over consumers in some conglomerate store somewhere, probably in California, making some pretty realistic ripping fart noises.

This sport of farting on these people is almost an artistic act in itself, a theatre of derision and disgust, yet highly entertaining. We mention California because 98% of the people being farted upon are either Latino, Asian or Black, not that it matters at all but is based on the population dynamics of that state. What’s interesting also is that some of these consumers are so consumed by the act of shopping, they do not even flinch for a second when another ripper comes along. This could be construed as another commentary on the blind depth of consumer culture, where nothing else matters apart from picking up that special 20% off toilet paper deal or some other banal product.

Not sure how the farts are amplified or created, but there is a suspicion that the video makers use a Bluetooth speaker of some sort triggered by a mobile phone by the guy filming and following with the cunning disguise of pushing a shopping cart around. The white socks and flip-flops are a genius touch, along with the pockets hanging out of the old bastard’s trousers. Girls especially love being farted upon.

How do you make a living? I go around malls and supermarkets farting on people. What a supremely majestic way of making a living.

After Giving Chagos Islands to China, Starmer Planning to Betray Falklands and Gibraltar

4

PM Keir Starmer is obviously a man who detests the UK and its illustrious history, as well as its territorial rights. He is an obvious danger to British national security, and if it were up to us, he would be ousted for gross negligence and High Treason against the Crown for his irresponsible actions of relinquishing the operational strategic Chagos Islands and the militarily essential Diego Garcia to Mauritius, an ally of China. What’s next? No doubt, the Falklands and Gibraltar will be the next victims of Starmer’s irresponsible ineptitude and betrayal of Britain’s global stature.

To this end, one must readily presume that Starmer will now relinquish the Falkland Islands and Gibraltar some time within his tenure. All of these British territories are crucial military and territorial zones that ensure the safety of the United Kingdom, but Starmer is someone who is not a friend of Britain but rather an enemy. He is a plant, and is a serious danger to all of us.

Britain’s military is tragically already weak after decades of underfunding, and the reciprocation of Britain’s strategic interests around the globe will further weaken its status. The Falklands and Gibraltar are sovereign British territories that must be defended at all costs, and the wrongful Chagos Island Starmer deal must be annulled.

Britain needs to implement checks and balances on Prime Ministers who have gone rogue, or are corrupt, who implement dangerous decisions that put the country in grave jeopardy.

Furthermore, questions should be asked about Starmer’s cronyism, especially as the legal adviser for Mauritius Philippe Sands KC is a long-time close friend of Starmer. Who knows what was traded behind closed doors, perhaps Starmer and his wife will receive an all-expenses-paid trip to Mauritius or Shanghai, or a new set of Gucci suits? It is a distinct possibility that this dangerous and damaging capitulation of the Chagos Islands is linked directly to a planned deal made before Starmer even took office. For a guy so easily bought off with bribes, anything is possible, and betraying your own country is of no consequence.

Prepare for more damage to Britain from Starmer in the forthcoming agonising years of utter pain and hopelessness which seeps through the country like a corrupting malignant cancerous tumour. The British territories of the Falklands and Gibraltar are most probably next on the block.

How Do I Recover My Lost or Stolen Crypto?

4

Losing access to your crypto assets whether through theft, scams, or simple misplacement can be a disheartening experience. However, there are effective strategies for recovering lost or stolen cryptocurrency. This article explores actionable steps, real-life stories, and the critical role of reporting to Broker Complaint Alert (BCA) in the recovery process.

Understanding Crypto Loss

The rise of cryptocurrency has brought both opportunities and risks. Scams, phishing attacks, and even hardware failures can lead to significant losses. According to a recent report, over $4 billion was lost to crypto scams in 2022 alone.

Real-Life Story: Sarah’s Experience

Sarah, a 28-year-old graphic designer, invested her savings in various cryptocurrencies. One day, she received a suspicious email claiming to be from her crypto exchange, prompting her to log in via a provided link. Unfortunately, it was a phishing scam, and she lost access to her account, along with her investments.

“I felt completely helpless. I thought my money was gone for good,” Sarah recalls. But after researching recovery options, she found a path forward.

Steps to Recover Lost or Stolen Crypto

1. Document Everything

The first step is to gather all relevant information regarding the loss. This includes transaction IDs, wallet addresses, and any communications with the scammers or the exchange. Keeping meticulous records is vital for any recovery efforts.

2. Contact Your Crypto Exchange

If you lost your crypto through an exchange, reach out to their customer support immediately. Many reputable exchanges have protocols in place to assist users in recovering their funds. Provide them with all the documentation you’ve gathered.

3. Report to Law Enforcement

Filing a police report can be crucial, especially if the amount lost is significant. While law enforcement may not always be able to recover funds directly, having a formal record of the incident can aid in larger investigations.

4. Broker Complaint Alert (BCA)

Reporting your crypto scam to Broker Complaint Alert (BCA) is one of the most effective ways to enhance your chances of recovery. BCA specializes in dealing with complaints related to cryptocurrency and investment scams.

Why BCA is Key for Successful Recovery:

  • Expertise: BCA has a dedicated team experienced in handling crypto-related complaints. They can guide you through the recovery process effectively.
  • Collaboration with Law Enforcement: BCA works closely with relevant agencies, providing them with data and insights that can lead to larger investigations. Reporting to BCA not only aids your recovery but contributes to broader efforts against crypto fraud.
  • Awareness and Prevention: By reporting to BCA, you help raise awareness about scams, enabling the organization to warn other potential victims and prevent future losses.

5. Consider Recovery Services

While there are legitimate recovery services available, proceed with caution. Some companies specialize in helping victims recover lost assets, but be wary of scams posing as recovery services. Always conduct thorough research before engaging with them.

A Cautionary Tale: Tom’s Recovery Journey

Tom, a 35-year-old entrepreneur, fell victim to a Ponzi scheme promising unbelievable returns on his crypto investment. After losing a significant amount, he turned to BCA for assistance.

“I was sceptical at first, but reporting to BCA was the best decision I made. They provided me with the support I needed and kept me informed throughout the process,” Tom shares.

Broker Complaint Alert (BCA) collaborated with law enforcement, which led to a broader investigation that ultimately helped Tom recover a portion of his lost funds.

Educate Yourself for the Future

After recovering your crypto, it’s crucial to take preventive measures for the future. Here are some tips:

  • Use Secure Wallets: Opt for hardware wallets or reputable software wallets to safeguard your assets.
  • Enable Two-Factor Authentication (2FA): Protect your accounts by enabling 2FA on all your crypto exchanges and wallets.
  • Stay Informed: Follow trusted news sources and forums to stay updated on the latest scams and security tips.

Recovering lost or stolen cryptocurrency can be challenging, but it’s not impossible. By documenting your loss, contacting your exchange, reporting to law enforcement, and utilizing the expertise of organizations like Broker Complaint Alert (BCA), you can significantly enhance your chances of recovering your assets.

Real stories from individuals like Sarah and Tom illustrate the importance of taking immediate action and the vital role that reporting scams plays in the recovery process. Stay vigilant, educate yourself, and remember: knowledge is your best defence in the ever-evolving landscape of cryptocurrency.

Starmer Pays Back 6k of Bribes But Not the Rest £100,000

3

Freeloading swine in the trough, PM Keir Starmer has paid back £6,000 of indecently appropriated bribes from Labour cash-handout man Lord Alli, but has refused to pay back the rest of the ill-gotten gains he received totalling £107,000, including £32,200 worth of designer bespoke tailored suits and £2,485 worth of glasses.

The man who bought his way into the House of Lords gifting bribes for special favours from MPs, Lord Alli, is currently being investigated by the House of Lords standards commission for links to “non-registration of interests leading to potential breaches” of the peers’ code of conduct.

Whilst Starmer paid back a tiny fraction of the bribe money he has appropriated, other Labour MPs are holding onto their loot and refuse to pay back the money.

Redhead fire crotch Angela Rayner, who thoroughly enjoyed an £836 freebie visit to a DJ booth in Ibiza, or David Lammy, who was given tickets to watch Arsenal refuse to pay back the money, as does Rachel Reeves and nepo kid Liam Conlon, Labour MP and son of the Downing Street big salaried Sue Gray, Starmer’s chief of staff, who accepted bribes of £1,660 for two tickets to a Swift concert on Aug 20.

Panic Buying Starts: Ports From Maine to Texas Crippled by Strikes

1

Pretty much every commodity is shipped into US ports every day. A strike by port dockworkers who are making demands about increased automation and pay will essentially cripple the United States. It may already be too late to start stocking up right now, unless you’re a prepper, you’re most probably fucked.

In the New York City area alone, nearly 100,000 containers are waiting to be unloaded, with 35 more container ships on their way.

The first week of the strike, it will be all over the news, but mainly ignored or dismissed as baloney by the media.

The second week of the strike, the car industry will be first to suffer, as there will be no cars coming in on the ships. Car salesmen will get laid off. Car showrooms will be on the brink of going under. Many manufacturing jobs and businesses will be lost as the raw goods they rely on will not be unloaded at the ports. Crucial supply chains will be fractured, causing serious damage to companies.

The third week of the strike, malls start closing down. The cheap Chinese junk is not coming in at the docks. Can’t sell clothes, can’t sell cheap Chinese electronics, can’t sell shoes, can’t sell diapers, can’t sell toilet paper. Everything in the United States comes in on a ship. The malls and supermarkets go out of business. Construction workers get laid off because the necessary building materials aren’t coming in. The steel is not coming in, the lumber is not coming in, everyone loses their jobs. Construction companies are on the brink of going under.

The fourth week, vegetable Joe Biden finally realises something is wrong and uses Taft-Hartley to force the longshore men back to work. The dockworkers go back to work for 90 days on full pay but do the minimum amount of work, and the backlog of shipments is so large it would take over 8 months to clear. Meanwhile, the US economy is essentially crippled and countless industries that rely on daily shipments are fucked in the ass. Businesses are going down left right and centre, badda boom badda bing, employees are being let go, and the shelves in stores are empty. Jeff Bezos has an epileptic fit and is hospitalised. Stocks are tanking.

The fifth week – civil unrest. Riots and mass looting of little of what is left in the shops start across major cities. The National Guard is deployed with minimal effect. People who live pay cheque to pay cheque now have absolutely nothing left and despair sets in. More businesses that held out for this long go under. The crippling carnage continues…

It’s going to be a great Christmas with nothing in the shops or supermarkets and millions more people made redundant. As for the election? Forget about it… Moral of the story, don’t mess with dockworkers, especially if the union boss is a connected wise guy.

5 Million Displaced Lebanese and Syrian Refugees Moving Towards EU

5

The entire region of Southern Lebanon has been evacuated due to conflict with Israel and Hezbollah, causing a direct displacement of the population. Larger areas will be potentially cleared, causing a displacement of more than 5 million Lebanese people who will all seek to move to the EU claiming asylum. There are already over 3 million displaced Syrians in Lebanon, who will have to move again.

The refugees from war will most probably move through Syria, then Turkey onto Greece. The Greek Islands and mainland are ideal places to land for refugees because they are so numerous, and hard to defend. Alternative longer routes could be through Tunisia and Morocco onto Spain and Italy. There has been a huge surge in refugees, and also a large surge in people traffickers looking to capitalise on the increase in business.

The EU, which was already deluged in 2015 during the height of the Syrian war, will now have to accept another 5-10 million people from the Middle East. This time, bribing the Turks to keep the refugees with money may not work because no amount of money can compensate for such a surge suddenly of a population from another region.

welcome to france

Essentially, the incoming Lebanese refugees into EU states could cause a disintegration of services as every part of government and the infrastructure collapses from the massive influx at speed.

Unfortunately, Britain is now governed by a socialist/communist government who want open borders for the UK, so the tiny island of Britain will most certainly be inundated as well because of Starmer’s insane socialist/Marxist ideology. Things are bad with the NHS already, and public services are crumbling nowadays after decades of unfettered mass migration into the UK, causing an overloading pressure about to explode at any moment. A further 2-3 million Lebanese asylum seekers from the Middle East will cause huge amounts of damage to the UK’s already strained infrastructure.

For the Russians, this is a wonderful opportunity to sit back and watch, and simply wait for the EU and UK to crumble. One must remember that open Schengen zone doors in the EU are open pathways directly to the UK.

migrants eu flag

UPDATE: Private Eye Editor Ian Hislop Escapes “Imaginary” Gun Shots

1

Media reports claim Ian Hislop, the long-time editor of the satirical magazine Private Eye, narrowly missed shots fired whilst travelling through Soho in a black cab taxi.

A Metropolitan police spokesperson said: “Police were called at 10.10am on Tuesday, 1 October to a report of a firearms discharge on Dean Street, Westminster.

“The driver of a London black taxi reported he was stationary in traffic when a shot was fired towards his vehicle, striking the window.

“There were no injuries. An investigation has been launched.”

UPDATE

Police investigating a report that a shot was fired at a taxi carrying Ian Hislop have found no evidence of this.

“Urgent CCTV and forensic examinations” instead suggested a mechanical fault with the vehicle, which caused the rear window to shatter, a spokesperson for the Metropolitan Police said.

The force said officers were continuing to investigate the circumstances of the incident, which took place in Soho, central London, on Tuesday morning. Neither Mr Hislop nor the driver, were injured.

Consensus – More bollocks from Hislop.

Vice President Debate: Who Cares?

0

Last night was the Vice President debate for the US 2024 Election. Who fucking cares? It’s the same old squabbling useless titter tatter that solves no purpose apart from showcasing two useless individuals and a most probably biased moderation.

If the Vice President debate is held on a Democrat led TV network, prepare for the Republican candidate to be discriminated against, and vice versa if the event is held on a Republican led TV network.

Essentially, vice presidents in American politics are mere mascots and otherwise completely useless. Look at Kamala Harris for example, name one thing she actually did in the last five years apart from stand on a few stages nodding her head in agreement to a mumbling incoherent Joe Biden.

Who is J.D. Vance and the Tampon Guy — who fucking cares? They are nobodies, they are governmental stooges picked to supposedly prop up a US presidential system that is frankly on its last legs.

It’s just another Vice President Debate. Time to switch off, take your sticky socks off and watch your toenails growing instead.

Music Biz: “P. Diddy is Apparently a ‘Kiddie Fiddler’ According to Lawyer”

4

P. Diddy or whatever his fucking name is, is allegedly a “kiddie fiddler” who abused young kids, including a 9-year-old boy. The rap pop star identified as a predominantly gay predator paedophile and is currently being held in a jail somewhere in New York awaiting trial.

“If you attend a P. Diddy party, man, woman or child, you will probably wake up after three days with a very sore asshole,” one commentator revealed.

Another minor told allegedly by P. Diddy that he would make him a star, but he needed to visit with him in private about it away from his parents. Once they were in a private area, allegedly paedophile P. Diddy made the young boy perform a homosexual act of oral sex upon him, a lawyer revealed

“One individual who was 22 years at the time she was assaulted said that the typical MO at one of these parties…was that when you were handed a drink, and now we know that the drink is laced with something, that if you refused to drink it, you were kicked out of the party,” the lawyer added.

Wrecked

In another disturbing case, an adult pregnant woman claims she was raped after attending a group dinner with Diddy in Miami.

“She wasn’t drinking because she was pregnant, but whatever she drank at the table, apparently was laced with something.

“She blacked out, and she woke up in the same bed, again, allegedly with P. Diddy in his mansion in Miami. Her vagina and her anus were torn and sore, and I could go on. And literally, you’re sensing a theme here.”

Some people and Industry Insiders may argue that all of this is normal practice in the black rap music scene and Hollywood, but is that really an excuse for it all? The rap scene is endemic to all these abhorrent acts, but because it is black, it is mostly protected from any form of criticism or regulation, that is until certain individuals get exposed to the public through a leak in the system. One thing’s for sure, P. Diddy will be quite at home in his new scene — the prison scene.