17.7 C
London
Sunday, December 22, 2024
secret satire society
HomeHealthIntimate TSA Agents May Get Ebola First

Intimate TSA Agents May Get Ebola First

NEWARK - USA - Intimate body searches at airports across the United States could mean that TSA agents contract the deadly Ebola virus first.

ai

As the cocky TSA agent tells the man to bend over from West Africa and pats his crotch down, a bead of sweat falls onto his gloved hand. With a gestation period of 21 days little does the TSA agent know that when he has an itch in his eye three minutes later, he’s rubbing Ebola virus into his eye.

TSA agents are on the front line, fondling, stroking people’s private parts during invasive searches daily.

“It’s not just the TSA agents who are at risk, they don’t change their gloves after each invasive search, they use the same pair of gloves all day, therefore any viral pathogens present on a gloved hand stay there and are spread from person to person. One person can therefore infect thousands in a day,” Dr. Lucius Trimble, from the Washington Virus Research Institute told MSNBC.

 

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
ds-freedom-expression-banner

4 COMMENTS

  1. How about the ETD swabs they rub on people and peoples possessions? You see these swabs laying around, being reused no telling how many times.

    TSA should be tossing these swabs after each use given the real threat that Ebola presents.

Comments are closed.

- Advertisment -ds-santa-banner

NEWS ON THE HOUR

ds-pope-banner

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!