WASHINGTON D.C. - USA - Supreme Commander of the Soviet Democratic Republic of America (SDRA) Comrade Barack Obama today taunted those traitors who have tried to derail his five year plan of health collectivization.
“Comrades! I stand here in the Soviet White House and I look down on you the brave people, the workers, the furloughed workers at home, and most of all the enemies and terrorists who are trying to derail the 5-year-plan for health collectivization. For those enemies of my supreme command, I say this to you. We will go ahead with our plan whether you like it or not. We will crush you with our sheer will. We will decimate you in your fox holes. We will hunt you down like the animals you are then force you to watch Obamacare educational videos so you may be re-educated. If you refuse, we will simply shoot you. No one or anything will stop my resolve in implementing Obamacare,” Comrade Obama told a cheering crowd of three dedicated Obamamite supporters outside the Soviet White House on Friday.
Comrade Obama and Commissar Reid have declared every day in the SDRA to be a celebration of Obamacare.
“Citizens of the Soviet Democratic Republic of America, you will be rewarded by death panels where there will be a lottery on who lives and dies from Obamacare. Additionally, all citizens’ previously private medical records will be harvested and distributed to any State department or employer that requests them. By signing up to Obamacare, your IP address will be logged and recorded so all citizens of the SDRA will enjoy the safety of knowing that their every thought is tracked. We reserve the right to increase the Obamacare taxation at any time, and if you cannot pay, you will be fined or imprisoned in a FEMA camp somewhere in Utah. In the future, we will require all Obamacare recipients to have RFID chips implanted in their bodies, for their own safety and health. Remember, that this is all for your own good. Thank you for not voting for this, we are implementing it whether you like it or not.”
MOSCOW - Russia - The Kremlin has ordered the mass production of nuclear shelters throughout…
LONDON - England - The Earthwise think tank has outlined why it is futile for…
TEL AVIV - Israel - Israeli PM Benjamin Netanyahu may be forced to wear a…
HELL - The Eternal Inferno - "Two Jags" former Labour Deputy John Prescott will soon…
LONDON - England - A think tank has outlined methods ordinary citizens can conduct peaceful…
GRIMSBY - England - Labour is planning to completely exterminate and erase traditional farms, replacing…
This website uses cookies.