Take Me to the American Amsterdam

DENVER - U.S.A - Colorado is set to overtake Amsterdam as the cannabis capital of the world.

It’s not only millions of Americans who are making a pilgrimage to Colorado, now officially the pot capital of America, but millions of tourists could come to the U.S. state as well in search of the perfect toke session. This is America’s ticket out of major deficit debt and plans are afoot to legalise marijuana all over America.

“America is the next Amsterdam. This is a great way to have fun and get out of debt as well. Soon everyone in America is going to be stoned. You know how Jim once said ‘stoned immaculate’ wish he was around today to see this,” a dedicated stoner, Dean Ganje, 21, told local news stations.

Walking through Denver the legal marijuana shops selling their wares have popped up all over the place.

“This is a haven man..I never seen such a buzz since I took a trip to Amsterdam. We got different folk coming here, airline pilots, brain surgeons and politicians plus don’t forget all the old school stoners. You come here get stoned every day and forget about everything,” Brad Mullen, a pot shop owner told CBS news.

Most Americans are already medicated with anti-depressants so this additional drug may only add to the levels of psychosis across the country a report from a team of psychiatrists revealed recently.

“Smoking every day will bring on severe psychosis in the future. Let’s see, prescription drug use in the U.S. is pandemic, add on marijuana related psychosis and you’ve got a cocktail there for some serious psychiatric problems amongst the populations. Additionally add in the factor that large portions of the population are armed to the teeth and we got a real clusterf*ck…ah..what the hell…” a critic of the Colorado program revealed before lighting up another fat one.

Daily Squib Book

DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
Disqus Comments Loading...
Share
Published by

Recent Posts

Don’t Expect Any Help From the NYPD If You’re On the Subway Burning

NEW YORK - USA - Ever wanted to go to NYC? Don't bother. It's not…

2 hours ago

Why Labour Needs to Keep Doing What They’re Doing

LONDON - England - There is a valid reason to allow Labour to continue what…

4 hours ago

Comrades, We Wish 760,000 Pensioners a Merry Freezing Christmas Death

GRIMSBY - England - The People's Soviet Republic of Britain and Labour Party are hoping…

22 hours ago

Beyond Satire: ‘Anti-Islamist’ Saudi Ploughs Car Through German Christmas Market

MAGDEBURG - Germany - Another beyond satire moment where an Arab migrant doctor who claims…

2 days ago

Lord Mandy Sent By Starmer to Washington to Thwart Trump

LONDON - England - Lord Mandy is being sent by Starmer to Washington to keep…

3 days ago

COVER-UP: Daily Squib Knew Biden Was Senile and Unfit Before 2020

LONDON - England - What the mainstream media is reporting today, the Daily Squib knew…

3 days ago

This website uses cookies.