Historian: Woke Black Vikings Invented Hip Hop in Norway

A prominent Google historian has posited that woke black Vikings from Norway invented Hip Hop and rap music in the year 800 AD.

Professor Wendell Donquey Jnr. III Esquire, a woke academic of the Google AI History Faculty, came to the conclusion when he was doing some new research at the Google Campus in Mountain View, California.

“This is dedicated to the niggas that was down from day one! Da muffugin’ Vikings! I’s tellin’ y’all mufuggas! I axed da Google AI machine to mek me an image of a Scandinavian Vikin’ ‘n’ shiet. Hit me up wit a cracka! Nex muffugin thang I see is a photo of a nigga as a Viking ‘n’ shiet. Nawatam sayin’? It wuz right there clear as a big ass strappin’ mandingo climbin’ a tree — a muffuger Viking black man. Dis proofs right there dat de vikings were black as the night. We now inclusiverizing da history ‘n’ shiet! Dis is gonna re-writize history right in yo jizzoes! I’m finna writerize a historized book about dis shiet!”

The Vikings were black

According to the professor, the Vikings were all black and invented hip hop music as well as the African American musical genre of rap music, which is so prevalent in the music business up to today.

“Wen dey was in dose ships sailin’ inda wind dey be rappin’ n doin’ beatbox! Dey invented Gangster Rap, y’na lak IceT and Snoopy Dogg! Us Vikings pillagerized da world ‘n’ shiet! Folks were scared of us cuz we wuz da OG Viking niggaz! Yanumsayin’?”

In the year 1030, according to professor Donquey, the Vikings invaded Britain and brought hip hop rap culture to the Anglo-Saxons and Celts.

“We brought those Brit ass inbred muffuggas rape culture! Before they did not know such thangs but we wuz raping ‘n’ raping lak it wuz goin’ outta business! Oh shiet! I meant I wuz finna ta say ‘rapping’ we wuz rapping not raping! Uh mebbe a lil rapin’ here or there. Pillagerizing wuz whut Vikings did! Did I also mentionize dat Cleopatra da  mufuggin’ queen of Egypt was black too?”

Professor Donquey’s historical analysis and research is so intriguing that he has been prompted to tour all the universities of California and Portland, Oregon, the woke paradises of progressive inclusivity, to share his wonderful work with the indoctrinated woke students.

“Imma axe y’all ta respeck our black Viking history. If y’all laff at me or tells me dis is bullshit Imma finna gots to get Medieval on yo azz! Yanna jus’ lak our Viking ancestors did ‘n’ shiet! Na hook up a Viking brudder wit a Philly blunt ‘n’ a forty! Hmmm, hmmm, triple cheeseburger, some fries and a muffugin’ couple sodas ‘n’ shit… hot apple turnover and all that old shit, nigga! Ooh, I’m ready to get my munch on. Dayum, my last joint, don’t fuck wit’ me, fool! Pass the bud, Who got da dub sacks?”