17.7 C
London
Thursday, November 21, 2024
secret satire society
HomeEntertainmentPalace Tells Kate Middleton She Might Have to Wear Burkini From Now...

Palace Tells Kate Middleton She Might Have to Wear Burkini From Now On

LONDON - England - Buckingham palace aides have told the Duchess of Cambridge, Kate Middleton, that she may have to wear a burkini from now on when she is at the seaside.

The burkini fashioned by Muslim women, has also been adopted by celebrities like Nigella Lawson, especially during a recent beach holiday to the South of France.

It is increasingly being used by non-Muslim female celebrities as a way of preserving their modesty from the prying eyes of waiting paparazzi.

“Unfortunately the recent topless photos and the latest Italian nude pregnancy snaps published by an Italian celebrity magazine are the last straw that broke the camels back. We have thus instructed Kate to go burkini shopping in Dubai or somewhere around Marble Arch,” one of the palace aides told the BBC.

There has been palace fury directed at Kate Middleton’s uninvited photographers and publishers and someone needs to put a stop to this immediately.

“She takes a six figure taxpayer funded luxury holiday every three weeks so we will need to be vigilant in our stand against the paparazzi,” a key palace spokesman said yesterday.

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
- Advertisment -

NEWS ON THE HOUR

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!