Youths Attack Ugly Dog Prize Winner

HADLEY WOOD - England - One of Britain's ugliest dogs is recovering after she was attacked by a gang of youths who pulled out her only clump of real hair, her manager said.

Amy, who was named Britain’s Ugliest Dog by a national newspaper in 2005/6/7/8/9, was set on by a gang of teenagers after she went missing from her home in Hadley Wood, North London.

The twenty-five-year-old pure bred Jewish singer was rescued by a passer-by who saved her from the teenagers who were trying to wash her face with a flannel in a nearby park.

“They even pulled out her only clump of real hair,” said manager Dean Cohen, 46. “It was the only real hair she had.”

He said: “Amy leapt out of the lounge window last Thursday. She must have seen someone outside with some coke or skank because she is a real ‘caner’ Amy is.

“We searched high and low for hours and put posters up around the neighbourhood. I was convinced she had ended up under a car.

“About five hours after she went missing I got a phone call from a lady saying, ‘I think I found your dog in the park, but don’t get too excited because I had to pry her away from five 11-15-year-olds who were giving her a good rinsing.”

Mr Cohen said he took Amy to the local A&E where she was treated for bruises and a couple of sores.

He added: “Of course I immediately contacted all the relevant newspapers before we took her in to A&E.

“People might say she is ugly but when you spend a minute with her you realise she doesn’t have much of a personality either.”

Daily Squib Book

DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
Disqus Comments Loading...
Share
Published by

Recent Posts

Comrades, We Wish 760,000 Pensioners a Merry Freezing Christmas Death

GRIMSBY - England - The People's Soviet Republic of Britain and Labour Party are hoping…

11 hours ago

Beyond Satire: ‘Anti-Islamist’ Saudi Ploughs Car Through German Christmas Market

MAGDEBURG - Germany - Another beyond satire moment where an Arab migrant doctor who claims…

2 days ago

Lord Mandy Sent By Starmer to Washington to Thwart Trump

LONDON - England - Lord Mandy is being sent by Starmer to Washington to keep…

3 days ago

COVER-UP: Daily Squib Knew Biden Was Senile and Unfit Before 2020

LONDON - England - What the mainstream media is reporting today, the Daily Squib knew…

3 days ago

Why Eco and Green Groups Are Silent Over Labour Plans to Bulldoze Protected Countryside

THE COUNTRYSIDE - England - It is rather funny that the eco and green groups…

4 days ago

Pensioners Are Freezing This Christmas Thanks to Starmer and Reeves

SCUNTHORPE - England - The evil Labour Party and Keir Starmer are laughing with glee…

4 days ago

This website uses cookies.