Pop star Elton John is making immediate plans to travel to Moscow, Russia for an urgent imaginary meeting with President Vladimir Putin to discuss the benefits of homosexuality.
“This is urgent. After the phone call with Putin I immediately announced to the world through social networks that I had a fabulous conversation with him. I am so excited to be invited to Moscow. Maybe we can have a Russian sauna and beat each other with twigs together, he is so macho and hunky. I hope the president has an Italian marble floor in his bathroom so Furnish and I can roll around on it,” Sir Elton said excitedly from his penthouse in Miami.
Sir Elton John is expecting a red carpet welcome to Russia and full hospitality including saunas, dancing boys and lots of unmentionable things.
John has a notoriously bad temper so these demands better happen, or else. You have been warned Putin.
