BBC to do a HIGNFY on Top Gear

SALFORD - England - Looks like Jeremy Clarkson is to be Angus Deaytoned, as is the customary response from the BBC towards anyone who either gets too big for their boots or gets tripped up somehow by some unsavoury internal political sting.

Rigor mortis

“Yes, each episode of the Top Gear franchise will be hosted by a different celebrity, much like the insipid fall from satirical grace that befell Have I Got News For You, where every week they have been hosting some heavily scripted celebrity bottom sniffer to cajole the egos of the Mertons and Hislops,” a BBC executive revealed today from his London to Manchester black cab taxi ride.

Having a multi-celebrity cushion for these long-standing franchises is also a form of appeasement for the BBC, where they attempt to escape any form of blame from the audience.

The offering of a million quid per year for the hamster and May to stay is still in the works, and it is not known whether they will refuse the bait, or whether they will be tempted by aunty’s fishy knicker smell wafting through the putrid BBC air like a pungent thick soup of festering carrion.

Yet another reason to not pay the BBC poll tax, amongst many.

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