17.7 C
London
Sunday, December 22, 2024
secret satire society
HomeEntertainmentMichael Jackson Writes Book to Save Neverland

Michael Jackson Writes Book to Save Neverland

LOS ANGELES - CA - Michael Jackson will come up with the $25 million needed to save Neverland by March 19th after receiving a multi-million dollar advance for writing a tell-all book.

ai

What with dangling babies from hotel rooms and his penchant for pyjama parties with pre-pubescent young boys, you may not think that Michael Jackson is one for writing a book about the art of rearing children. But with the help of a Saudi Prince he has just been published and can now pay off some of his debts.

Michael Jackson’s new book: “The In’s and Out’s of Child Rearing” will be released on March the 3rd.

Neverland Saved

The multi-million dollar advance he will receive from his Saudi backers will hopefully be able to save his beloved Neverland ranch from the creditors.

Prince Al-Waleed Bin Abdul Sultan Bandar III also has good faith that the $25 million advance he has given to Michael Jackson will reap good profits from worldwide sales of Jackson’s new book. The Saudi Prince sympathises with Jackson’s plight and has even let the pop star stay near his camel racing stables in Jeddah where the stable boys and youthful jockeys fawn over the star.

 

The new book will reveal to the world how Michael likes to rear children and how he uses a hands-on approach. Jackson also reveals the first words his child said to him: “Which one’s mummy?” and then “Aaaaaargh!”

Even though Jackson refinanced his $300 million loan from Fortress Investments with help from Sony Music, HSBC and Barclays Bank, his Neverland ranch was not part of the deal and was still under threat.

For Jackson, the fear of losing the ranch that brought him such wonderful memories was a source of great anguish.

Memories like when he blew his first nose and the time he got so drunk on Jesus Juice he ended up staying Home Alone with Macaulay Culkin.

“The In’s and Out’s of Child Rearing” by Michael Jackson will be available through Al Saud Publishing on 3rd March.

  Daily Squib Book

  DAILY SQUIB BOOK The Perfect Gift or can also be used as a doorstop. Grab a piece of internet political satire history encapsulating 15 years of satirical works. The Daily Squib Anthology REVIEWS: "The author sweats satire from every pore" | "Overall, I was surprised at the wit and inventedness of the Daily Squib Compendium. It's funny, laugh out loud funny" | "Would definitely recommend 10/10" | "This anthology serves up the choicest cuts from a 15-year reign at the top table of Internet lampoonery" | "Every time I pick it up I see something different which is a rarity in any book"
ds-freedom-expression-banner

2 COMMENTS

  1. You don’t need to buy it, you all ready did. Hook, Line, and Sinker. Your kind is going out with the bush’s. God Bless Michael Jackson, And god damn you sir.

Comments are closed.

- Advertisment -ds-santa-banner

NEWS ON THE HOUR

ds-pope-banner

MORE NEWS

THE DAILY SQUIB ANTHOLOGY

The definitive book of Juvenalian satire and uncanny prophesies that somehow came true. This is an anthology encompassing 15 years of Squib satire on the internet compiled and compressed into one tiddly book. Buy the Book Now!