17.7 C
London
Saturday, December 21, 2024
secret satire society
Home Blog

The Daily Squib Anthology Book Now For Sale

Unter Mensch
-
4
The Daily Squib Anthology Book Now For Sale

As the editor of the Squib I can proudly announce that The Daily Squib Anthology From 2007 to 2022 is finally for sale.

Since founding the Daily Squib on April 1st 2007, many changes have taken place on the internet and indeed the globe. This is why this carefully curated anthology encapsulates those changes in a satirical manner. Fifteen years of different presidents, prime ministers, wars, peace and a myriad of little societal nuances that made up that period of history.

Looking for that curious unique gift for dad’s Christmas stocking, or something to read while taking the dump of the century in your toilet, the Daily Squib Anthology is the perfect celebration of our times, good and bad?

Come, join the circus, look at the clowns and listen to the troubadours as they usher in a new era for humanity, horrific yet beautiful at the same time, a glowing paradoxical dystopian paradise entrenched in reality show hell and fake celebrity appearances. All manner of fantastic beasts projectile vomiting over everything daringly encapsulating this curious rare book compiled with the indomitable spirit of Juvenalis in mind, but furnished within a modern 21st century outlook.

A bold erupting satisfying fart into the darkest and illuminating facets of humanity’s wonders, The Daily Squib Anthology is now available to buy direct from the publisher or from Amazon, or from any good bookshop.

Get your copy now, the first 150 are signed by the author.

The book will only be released in paperback.

daily squib book signed

Beyond Satire: ‘Anti-Islamist’ Saudi Ploughs Car Through German Christmas Market

Unter Mensch
-
0
Beyond Satire: ‘Anti-Islamist’ Saudi Ploughs Car Through German Christmas Market

What the freak is going on here? According to reports, an anti-Islamic Saudi Arabian doctor decided to drive his BMW at high speed through a German Christmas market full of Christians, tragically killing two people including a baby as well as injuring over 80 people. This is so far beyond logic and reason that it falls into the ‘beyond satire’ category.

In a world where rationality has seemingly disappeared, one wonders if insanity is going to be the new normal.

The Saudi Arabian man was given asylum into Germany in 2006 as a doctor in Psychiatry at a correctional facility in Bernberg, he is 50 years old. Under the auspices of the wonderful Angela Merkel, who also let in millions more migrants from the Middle East and Third World, Germany has become a cesspool of religious division and zealotry. Her tenure was defined by a wide-open immigration policy that will no doubt resonate in Germany for decades to come.

WARNING DISTRESSING VIDEO BELOW – PLUS FALSE INFORMATION AS THE SUSPECT WAS NOT AN ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT

Surely, if you’re an anti-Islamist as this Saudi doctor claims to be, you don’t mow down Christians at a Christmas market. No one should be mowing anyone down anywhere, of course. Something very strange is going on here, for sure.

Religious people have triggers to kill, and it does not matter if they claim to be anti-religious or have changed their religion. If they were initially indoctrinated with a religious form of programming, they are alters who can snap at any time.

The only thing this fucker has done is given the far-right more ammo to fight with, but maybe that was his double negative remit, we will probably never know.

Lord Mandy Sent By Starmer to Washington to Thwart Trump

Unter Mensch
-
0
Lord Mandy Sent By Starmer to Washington to Thwart Trump

Keir Starmer sent a troupe of 100 Labour election agitators to America during the 2024 election to destabilise and manipulate the Trump campaign. Sadly for the Democrats and Labour, the election interference from a foreign country did not work, and the Democrats lost. Now, Starmer is sending the Prince of Darkness himself, Lord Mandy, to Washington as a British ambassador so that he can mix things up for Trump during his presidency.

Lord Mandy describes Donald Trump as a “danger to the world” and as “a white nationalist and racist”.

Will the Americans fall for such malicious trickery? Probably not, is the simple answer. They certainly do not appreciate interference from foreign entities, and the Trump administration will not abide by some jumped up socialist British interference via the Labour Party in Washington. Lord Mandy’s mission is to advise Trump to side with the EU and Starmer’s Brexit Betrayal. Americans pride themselves greatly on breaking away from the authoritarian inhibitive clutches of the “Mother Land” and the pilgrims who sailed across the Atlantic in the Mayflower are never forgotten.

As for tax without representation, the Boston Tea Party is another chapter in the historical books of engrained American antipathy with the ways of the British.

There is some good news for Lord Mandy though, Barack Obama and Big Mikey will probably invite him around once in a while during his stay, maybe they can have a sauna together and do the things they like to do.

COVER-UP: Daily Squib Knew Biden Was Senile and Unfit Before 2020

Unter Mensch
-
0
COVER-UP: Daily Squib Knew Biden Was Senile and Unfit Before 2020

The White House cover-up of an unfit for office, senile, dementia ridden Joe Biden was explicitly known and broadcast by the Daily Squib even before he was installed into power and after the dubious 2020 election. Kamala Harris was in the wings. The conspiracy to defraud and manipulate the American people was a tragedy that should never have happened, and is a shameful disgrace to the American constitution.

Democrats: “Joe Biden is Perfectly Okay”

The mainstream media via the Wall Street Journal has only reported about the White House cover-up recently, whilst the Daily Squib has been reporting on Biden’s mental state from the beginning and were fully aware of the people behind the fraudulent operation.

Biden Says He’s Ready For the Election in 1987

Who was in power for four years? The de facto controlling power during that time was the third term of the Obama administration, we wrote in 2021. During the 2024 election campaign, the Obama controllers were even pushing the unfit Biden for a second term (Obama fourth term) but were severely thwarted when Biden was finally unmasked during the presidential debate with Trump.

Democrats Only Looking For Presidential Candidates With Advanced Dementia From Now On

biden white house brain investigate bill or hillary clintonThings were now not going to plan for the Democrats after the disastrous presidential debate, and they had to install Kamala Harris. This duplicitous false action of lying to the American people for four years by installing a crooked senile puppet into the White House for four years played against the Democrat Party because voters finally saw with their own eyes that without severe levels of scripting, teleprompting and coaching, Joe Biden was nothing but an empty shell. The Democrats lost the election on this factor alone, and fielding Harris after that moment was a futile effort.

The socialist Democrat Party and the people that installed Biden should be tried in courts for their crimes, but because they are part of the Machine State, they will probably never see the light of day.

Essentially, this proves that fooling Democrat voters is a very easy thing to do because they never question anything that is presented to them.

MORAL OF THE STORY – IF YOU WANT TO REALLY KNOW WHAT’S GOING DOWN YEARS BEFORE ANYONE ELSE – READ THE DAILY SQUIB!

Why Eco and Green Groups Are Silent Over Labour Plans to Bulldoze Protected Countryside

Unter Mensch
-
0
Why Eco and Green Groups Are Silent Over Labour Plans to Bulldoze Protected Countryside

If it were any other political party creating plans to bulldoze and concrete over Britain’s protected wildlife habitat and countryside there would be immediate protests and people chaining themselves to trees, but because it is the Labour government conducting this crime against the countryside, it is deemed as okay and permissible. There is only silence now, not even the sound of crickets as the eco and green groups keep schtum.

/english_countryside_bulldozer_211771872.jpg
One day my son this will all be yours

This is essentially why there is no outcry, and not one single voice of opposition, for the destructive plans of Labour are viewed as morally justifiable because they call themselves ‘socialists’. Naturally, the fellow socialists are given a free pass to obliterate the countryside and its precious protected wildlife and habitat. The BBC does not give a flying fuck, simply because they are the main media arm of the Labour Party and are suitably compensated to shut up. Forget about watching BBC nature programs about the British countryside or the Capercaillie, or the Red-backed Shrike, Great Crested Newt — they will soon be gone forever, bulldozed over, then unceremoniously carpeted to death with thick concrete. Don’t forget, the countryside has been labelled as ‘racist’ by the woke septon, and this further justifies its desecration.

The hypocritical eco green groups are showing their true colours with their silence, probably after receiving a few bungs stolen from the private sector by Labour.

Building garish, vulgar rows and rows of grey brutalist social housing estates over the permanently disappearing British countryside is okay now because the people who are doing it are socialists, Marxists and communists.

Dartmoor, Exmoor, the South Downs, Aston Rowant, Breckland, Yardley Chase, Bernwood Forest, these are some of the sorts of places that will fall prey to Keir Starmer’s goal to build 1.5 million new homes. One has to take into account that it will not just be the homes that are built over the countryside, but there will have to be roads, motorways, and other infrastructure.

The Yellow Marsh Saxifrage, the Cirl Bunting, the Fieldfare, the Scarlet Rosefinch, all gone, their habitats permanently destroyed and defiled, all because of those insistent house building targets.

Once it’s gone, it’s gone forever.

Pensioners Are Freezing This Christmas Thanks to Starmer and Reeves

Unter Mensch
-
2
Pensioners Are Freezing This Christmas Thanks to Starmer and Reeves

What do the evil Labour MPs care when they have large heating allowances for their various homes, and duck houses? They’re sending 500 million pounds worth of aid to China, who don’t need the foreign aid, whilst giving huge pay rises to the greedy 4-day-a-week train drivers already on salaries of £85,000 per annum. It’s going to be freezing this Christmas and Labour does not care one iota.

Old Woman winter fuel payments Labour Nasty Party
Over 4,000 pensioners will die from the cold this winter because their fuel allowance was taken away by Labour, and their pensions taxed.

“I’m giggling my woolly socks off at the thought that some old 80-year-old widow who has paid tax all her life, is sitting alone in a freezing, damp room in some fucking hovel this Christmas whilst the heating is on 24-hours-a-day in my own luxurious home. It is so hot in here right now, I’m sweating like a Catholic priest at a choir boy’s convention,” Keir Starmer commented from one of his many homes.

Evil

After taking away the winter heating allowance from some of the most vulnerable people in the country, Labour happily is spending £8 million per day on putting up illegal economic migrants in 5-star hotels, but the people who have grafted, paid tax and worked all their lives, some serving in the armed forces, have been forgotten and are being punished by an evil, venal, nasty Labour Party who fraudulently secured their way into power by lying to the electorate.

pensioner made homeless Labour Party keir starmer.- teeth Freezing This Christmas
Merry fucking Christmas!

This is why you have to listen to the Number One Christmas song this year, which has been cancel cultured by the just as evil as Labour and blatantly biased BBC: Freezing This Christmas OFFICIAL VIDEO by Sir Starmer and the Granny Harmers

PLEASE SUPPORT THE AGE UK CHARITY

https://www.ageuk.org.uk/

Sleazy Labour Liars Prove Election Promises Do Not Mean Anything in UK

Unter Mensch
-
0
Sleazy Labour Liars Prove Election Promises Do Not Mean Anything in UK

Labour lied and said anything to get elected by the chumps who voted for them. As the economy enters recession after six nightmare months of the sleazy Labour liars who have betrayed all the people they promised they would help during the election campaign, their betrayal is proof that elections in the UK do not mean anything any more.

Inflation UP, immigration UP, unemployment UP, debt UP, interest rates UP, tax UP, sleaze UP, betrayal UP

WASPI women, pensioners, farmers, businesses, working people, Brexiteers, they were all fed bollocks and lies by Labour who once in power treated the people who voted for them with utter contempt and derision.

During the laughable fraudulent General Election, the byword Labour used was “Change”. That in itself was the biggest fucking joke spouted from the socialist clowns, because as usual it’s more of the same, and in fact, even worse than the Tories.

Dishonourable Members of Parliament

This is proof that not only are Labour a bunch of fucking liars not to be trusted, but it also proves that election manifestos don’t mean anything.

Britain’s flawed two party system is not fit for purpose, as Labour and the Tories can lie through their teeth during election campaigns and not be held to account for the lies they spout. The sleazy Labour liars have proven that elections don’t account for shit under the current system.

The 5 Quirkiest Travel Experiences to Embark on this Year in the Valencian Community

Unter Mensch
-
0
The 5 Quirkiest Travel Experiences to Embark on this Year in the Valencian Community

Ah, the Valencian Community—land of sun, paella, and… eccentric adventures you didn’t know you needed. Sure, you could stick to lounging on the beach or taking selfies with the City of Arts and Sciences in Valencia. But where’s the fun in being predictable? For those landing at Alicante or Valencia airports, your arrival marks the start of a wild ride. And with a trusty rent a car from Victoria Cars, you can zoom straight into the bizarre, the bold, and the unforgettable.

pexels-jeremy-bishop-1260133-2397414 Valencian Community

The Canelobre Caves: Nature’s attempt at a Concert Hall

Picture this: a cavern so grand it could host a rock opera. Located near Alicante, the Canelobre Caves boast ceilings taller than your average ego and acoustics that could make even the worst karaoke singer sound like Adele. Attending a concert here is like being serenaded by Mother Nature herself—if she also happened to moonlight as a lighting designer.

Rent a car at Alicante airport allows you to access this underground wonder and even detour through quaint villages on your way. Who knew stalactites could be so cultured?

pexels-rperucho-29100767

The Tomatina: world’s most elaborate food fight

Ever dreamed of throwing tomatoes at complete strangers without legal repercussions? Welcome to Buñol, home of the Tomatina. Every August, this tiny town near Valencia becomes a battlefield where thousands gather to hurl overripe tomatoes in a chaotic, slippery mess. Forget your fancy dinners—this is how you truly embrace the spirit of sharing food.

Pro tip: bring goggles and a sense of humour. You’ll need both.

pexels-ali-camacho-adarve-2954347-12251226

Villena: time travel, Medieval Edition

If your idea of adventure involves castles and gold (and no dragons, sadly), Villena is your place. This medieval town, just a scenic drive from Valencia airport, is like stepping into a time machine. The Atalaya Castle dominates the skyline, while the local archaeological museum flaunts treasures that would make Indiana Jones jealous.

Car hire Valencia airport makes the journey a breeze—and allows you to sip wine in the surrounding vineyards like a true 12th-century noble.

pexels-thales13-22033444The Albufera Lagoon: where tranquillity meets rice

Less than an hour from Valencia lies the Albufera, a natural park where sunsets and serenity reign supreme. Here, you can glide across tranquil waters on a traditional boat while pondering life’s great questions, like: “Why doesn’t my local lake have this vibe?”

And if existential musings don’t fill you up, the Albufera is the birthplace of paella. Yes, the real deal. Forget the tourist traps; this is where your taste buds come to be reborn.

pexels-danila-giancipoli-891596-1799935Fanzara: Street Art in the middle of nowhere

Fanzara is a sleepy little village that decided to wake up one day and become a street art mecca. Every wall, door, and random surface in sight is now adorned with vibrant murals, courtesy of artists who saw potential where others saw… well, blank space.

It’s Instagram heaven, but with soul. And with a car rental, you can explore the surrounding countryside for even more “artistic inspiration.” Or just a great picnic spot—your call.

Freedom to explore with Victoria Cars

Let’s face it: public transportation is overrated. Renting a car from Victoria Cars gives you the freedom to chase whimsy, detour into the unknown, and avoid that dreaded tourist shuffle.

So, what’s it going to be? A standard holiday of predictable photo ops, or a dive into the quirky, the unexpected, and the downright fabulous? This year, the Valencian Community is calling—and it promises to leave you with stories that no one will believe.

Brexit Never Happened Anyway – Labour EU Union Was Inevitable

Unter Mensch
-
0
Brexit Never Happened Anyway – Labour EU Union Was Inevitable

The squandered chance to break away from the EU was a symptom of our times, as the much taunted Brexit never really happened. Through cowardice and laziness as well as a lack of creativity, there was no Brexit. Boris Johnson who wasted a massive mandate was more interested in the Number 10 wallpaper and was the one who brought in Net Zero because of his insidious newly acquired young mistress who controlled his mind and willy with great expertise. Douglas Carswell, the brainchild and visionary of the Vote Leave project, immediately left for America after the EU Referendum was won, and in doing so left a rudderless ship full of fumbling idiots with no idea what to do next. Nigel Farage was an establishment outsider, but was too late to come into the parliamentary game, and now that Labour are in, Reform is too ineffectual and too late to do much.

Britain has been under the EU yoke for decades, and has thus forgotten how to govern itself, how to make its own laws, and how to rule the waves again. When one adds in the sheer laziness of those who supposedly lead this country, then one can understand why it is easier for parliamentarians to let others rule over the country and make the laws.

Brexit was supposed to secure the borders, but under Theresa May, Boris Johnson, and Rishi Sunak over 15 million migrants were allowed into the UK. Last year alone, the Tories let in over 906,000 unskilled migrants from the Third World. That alone is proof that Brexit never happened. The ECHR and ECJ rule over this country, and the EU still has complete control over our borders and trade laws. Many of Britain’s laws were all created by the EU, and were never scrubbed.

The illegal migrant Channel crossings could have been stopped on day one if the British government had any fucking balls, but they don’t any more. The prison doors had been opened by Brexit, but in reality the indoctrination and fear of actual freedom was too scary for many as they peeked out into the light. It was better to slink back into the safety of the EU prison, to the safety of slavery and loss of sovereignty because Britain had become institutionalised after decades of EU indoctrination. Towing the boats back to France would have sufficed, but the cowardice within the establishment was too evident, and this is why millions upon millions of people are now in the UK, and they are here to stay using up all our resources.

No one should be surprised about Keir Starmer wanting to reset relations with the EU or giving away the tiny bit of sovereignty we have left. Absolutely no surprises, because it was all inevitable.

The old British fierceness and fucking fire has disappeared. There is no lion there, it’s more of a fucking donkey being pulled by a master. Britain, after decades of woke indoctrination is a castrated demoralised nation, those swinging balls have been lopped off and discarded into a medical waste bin and incinerated.

Brexit never really happened — there should not be one single iota of surprise that all the EU had to do was to wait a little bit for the idiots to officially come back running to them with a big fucking begging bowl. Starmer will now hand over everything back to the EU on a silver platter, and the Tories and Labour will all sigh with relief.

Bend over the table, Starmer and spread those cheeks far and wide.

“Comrades, Labour is Banning Democracy by Banning Local Elections”

Unter Mensch
-
0
“Comrades, Labour is Banning Democracy by Banning Local Elections”

Commissar Angela Rayner has announced that the People’s Soviet Republic of Britain is banning local elections because they are seen as a democratic threat to the communist rule of the country.

Banning local elections

“If you think about protesting the banning of democracy in the UK, might I remind you what happened in Tiananmen Square in China in the 1990s. As Labour is aligned with our comrades in China, along with the CCP, we too will crack down on any form of dissent. You saw what Comrade Starmer did to the people during the riots in the summer, well, this time it will be even worse.

“My red ginge minge can get very angry, and it has a voracious appetite, so watch out. You don’t want to get on my bad side. It’ll eat you up.

“Well, that’s enough about my chuff, I’m really serious about this. We are being threatened by democracy, so we’re stopping local elections until the Reform Party is deleted from existence. Remember comrades, elections are democratic. Yuck!”

INGSOC ORDER 498802221A-YH

CITIZEN AMY RICHARDS, 9, OF PERRYWELL CRESCENT, RADLETT, HERTFORDSHIRE WILL BE REWARDED WITH TWO USED LOLLYPOPS AND A TURNIP FOR REPORTING FOUR TEACHERS AND HER OWN FATHER TO THE AUTHORITIES FOR THOUGHTCRIMES AGAINST THE STATE. THE CRIMINALS WERE TAKEN AWAY THIS MORNING AND LIQUIDATED. CITIZENS OF BALDCOCK VILLAGE, BUCKINGHAMSHIRE WILL ALL BE REWARDED WITH ONE MONTH’S SUPPLY OF USED TOILET PAPER BECAUSE THEY ACCEPTED BY FORCE 250,000 SOVIET SOCIAL HOUSING SCHEMES TO BE BUILT ON THE LAST REMAINING GREEN BELT LAND DIRECTLY ADJACENT TO THEIR VILLAGE. WHEN THEY ARE ALSO FORCED TO ACCEPT A MEGA PRISON (GULAG) HOUSING 450,000 INMATES, THEY WILL ALL RECEIVE A DOUBLE PLUS GOOD THREE-MONTH SUPPLY OF USED CONDOMS AND TAMPONS.

The UK is a Davos ‘Great Reset’ Experiment Under Starmer’s Labour

Unter Mensch
-
1
The UK is a Davos ‘Great Reset’ Experiment Under Starmer’s Labour

Much like Chairman Mao’s Great Leap Forward, which caused the death of 60 million Chinese people, the Great Reset will also have its casualties. Britain under the hold of Keir Starmer and his team of apparatchiks is currently undergoing the beginning strains of the Great Reset, a Klaus Schwab World Economic Forum program which fundamentally means that citizens will own nothing and be ‘happy’ about it. This program involves essentially taxing people into nothingness and the redistribution of all private wealth and assets to the state but excluding royalty, billionaires and high party members.

The way to crush the bourgeoisie is to grind them between the millstones of taxation and inflation.

Vladimir Lenin

What Lenin said all those years ago is still in play today, and is being utilised fully by the Labour Party in the year 2024 onwards.

Impoverishing the private sector whilst growing the Big State, millions of businesses and companies have already left the UK after Labour were voted in by masochistic chump low-information voters.

The Great Reset may be a ‘wonderful’ plan on paper, but much like Net Zero, these lofty programs cannot work without a vast reduction in the global population. How can any plan like these decarbonisation initiatives work when the EU and UK are being besieged by millions upon millions of people coming in from the Third World, either illegally or legally. It is just not physically possible, especially when governments are so heavily burdened with the incoming populations and the costs involved with looking after this invasive parasitical movement.

Overpopulation is by far the greatest threat to the Great Reset, and this contentious subject will inevitably have to be addressed at some point.

Of course, King Charles and the royals are great fans of the Great Reset, but this is only natural because of their royal status, their legacy and wealth will be preserved whereas the normies/serfs will have everything taken from them.

In reference to the Great Reset being trialled in the UK, it is all too evident, and the Halloween budget from the Labour Chancellor of the Exchequer was proof, that the onus is in relinquishing the British population of their wealth and assets. One only has to see this with the inheritance tax brought in by Reeves, which will destroy hundreds of working farms in the UK. This action, according to Reeves and her cohorts, is a justified action because farmers feed the population and represent an undesirable class of “landed gentry” landowners to the Labour socialists and communists. By bulldozing over Britain’s farm land, Labour is planning a Net Zero, Great Reset advent of “sustainable” eco-friendly ventures, but first the farmers will have to have their generational wealth removed so that everything can be amalgamated with the Big State.

Think of the Great Reset as a form of modern feudalism, and you will get the idea.

123...733Page 1 of 733
squib footer 270

Breaking News

Copyright © Daily Squib 2024.

The Daily Squib is a curious satirical parody newspaper offering breaking news, political satire, comedy, investigative journalism, opinion and celebrity news.