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   October 6th, 2008  
'We Got Him'
LAS VEGAS - USA - Justice has finally found OJ Simpson thirteen years after his acquittal for the murder of his wife and her boyfriend.
 
 
Scientific Study Reveals Lazy People Live Longer
Scientific Study Reveals Lazy People Live Longer

STOCKHOLM - Sweden - Researchers working for the Stockholm Institute have released new data showing that inactivity and laziness are the keys to a long life.

Comrades Across World Welcome Centralized Economy
Comrades Across World Welcome Centralized Economy

NEW YORK - USA - The final bell tolled today for capitalism as a new era was ushered in.

John McCain's Vice President Sarah Palin Learning the Ropes
John McCain's Vice President Sarah Palin Learning the Ropes

WASHINGTON DC - USA - Republican VP hopeful Sarah Palin has been briefed by campaign advisers on what is needed to be John McCain's Vice President.



George Michael Builds Public Toilet in North London Home George Michael Builds Public Toilet in North London Home

LONDON - England - Speaking from an exact replica of a Hampstead Heath lavatory in his Highgate mansion, the famous singer is ecstatic about his new home...

Russian Annual Breastfeeding Vodka Marathon Underway Russian Annual Breastfeeding Vodka Marathon Underway

MOSCOW - Russia - The annual Russian Breastfeeding Marathon got off to a 'boinking' start today with the participation of nearly 200 Russian mothers and their...

Ku Klux Klan Protesters Interrupt Obama Event Ku Klux Klan Protesters Interrupt Obama Event

CORAL GABLES - USA - Barack Obama’s rally at the University of Miami was briefly interrupted today after a dozen or so protesters began to wave home-made KKK...

JK Rowling Donates £1million to Ministry of Labour's Undersecretary Dolores Umbridge JK Rowling Donates £1million to Ministry of Labour's Undersecretary Dolores Umbridge

LONDON - England - Out of touch fantasist and deluded author, JK Rowling, has donated a large sum of money to the Ministry of Nu-Labour headed by unelected...





Gordon Brown Unveils New...
Gordon Brown Unveils New...

LONDON - England - In addition to the myriad number of taxes introduced by Gordon Brown during his tenure as chancellor and PM, the new tax on...




Don't Worry Folks - US...
Don't Worry Folks  - US...

WASHINGTON DC - USA - The US Federal Mint was today printing more money at all...




Traitors Against Gordon...
Traitors Against Gordon...

LONDON - England - Supreme unelected leader, Comrade Brown has come down hard...




Palin May Drop McCain...
Palin May Drop McCain...

WASILLA - Alaska - Sarah Palin's team are considering dropping support man John...




Hurricane Command Centre...
Hurricane Command Centre...

St Louis - USA - The main weather command centre in the United States was in...





 
Air Guitar World Champion Breaks String Live in Concert Air Guitar World Champion Breaks String Live in Concert

LOS ANGELES - CA - American wins World Air Guitar Championships despite near disaster.

John McCain Cryonics Lab Opens in Arizona John McCain Cryonics Lab Opens in Arizona

ARIZONA - USA - Republican candidate for presidency, John McCain, 98, has opened a Cryonics facility in Scottsdale, Arizona.

OJ Simpson to Perform Prison Puppet Shows for Inmates OJ Simpson to Perform Prison Puppet Shows for Inmates

LAS VEGAS - Nevada - OJ Simpson is in training for his forthcoming prison puppet show tour.

Cliff Richard: Cliff Richard: "I'm Not Gay But My Boyfriend Is"

LONDON - England - Singer Sir Cliff Richard has revealed his close friendship with an ex-priest who he shares his life with.


 
 


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Bush Upset With McCain VP Pick
Bush Upset With McCain VP Pick

ST. PAUL - Minnesota - George W Bush was visibly upset with...

Alaskan Calendar Girl Melts GOP Igloo
Alaskan Calendar Girl Melts GOP Igloo

ANCHORAGE - Alaska - It's fu**ing freezing here in Alaska...

Stasi Councils to Recruit More...
Stasi Councils to Recruit More...

LONDON - England - Stasi councils are recruiting more...


opinion  |  popular  |  film  |  music |  art















Gordon Brown: "There is a Traitor...

SOUTHWOLD - England - Comrade Brown has ordered...

Gordon Brown Visited Weston-super-Mare...

WESTON-SUPER-MARE - England - Gordon Brown...

Dutch Olympic Team Lost in Beijing Smog

BEIJING - China - The whole Netherlands Olympic...

McCain Keeps Fit with Fencing Lessons

WASHINGTON DC - USA - John McCain the Republican...


Oct 2008
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NHS Sending Patients to Serbia for...

LONDON - England - The Government has admitted to...


Bush May Not Get Elected Next Time

WASHINGTON DC - USA - George W Bush fears that he...


Head of Wealthy International...

Rome - Italy - German scientists on behalf of...


Barack Obama Wants Permission to Build...

WASHINGTON DC - USA - Barack Hussein Obama is...


Calling People Fabians is Criminal

LONDON - England - People should stop using the...










Amy Winehouse Punches Fan After He Offers Her Singing Lessons Amy Winehouse Punches Fan After He Offers Her Singing Lessons

GLASTONBURY - England - Amy Winehouse the famous drugged up celebrity, viciously punched a singing instructor who happened to be in the audience at the...

Mugabe Surprised to Win Election Again Mugabe Surprised to Win Election Again

HARARE - Zimbabwe - Robert Mugabe has been taken aback at the vote tally after a close election contest after being pleasantly surprised to have won by such a...

England Fans Declare Euro 2008 Boring England Fans Declare Euro 2008 Boring

LONDON - England - The Euro 2008 Football Championship was declared a boring washout by England fans today in a poll commissioned by BBC 6 Sports.

Soviet British State Celebrates Comrade Brown's First Year as Supreme Leader Soviet British State Celebrates Comrade Brown's First Year as Supreme Leader

LONDON - England - Supreme unelected leader Comrade Gordon Brown was today honoured by high party officials and the people for his first year's unelected...


Guns 'N Roses to Release Album When China Becomes Democracy Guns 'N Roses to Release Album When China Becomes Democracy

LOS ANGELES - CA - A spokesman for Axl Rose has released a statement detailing the release of the new album which has been in production for 14 years.

McCain Trying Hard to Stay Alive for Election McCain Trying Hard to Stay Alive for Election

WASHINGTON DC - USA - Republican candidate John McCain is doing everything he can to stick around for the upcoming US general election for which he is a...

New Book Uncovers Startling Evidence that Adolf Hitler was a Practicing Hippy New Book Uncovers Startling Evidence that Adolf Hitler was a Practicing Hippy

MUNICH - Germany - Adolf Hitler took time out from running Nazi Germany to be a hippy and take psychedelic drugs, a new book claims.

Bill Clinton Glad Hillary Did Not Win Bill Clinton Glad Hillary Did Not Win

NEW YORK - USA - Former president of the United States, Bill Clinton has spoken of his relief that Hillary did not win the democratic candidacy.


  DAILY SQUIB NEWS

 News Updates When We Feel Like It
Traitorous Irish Rebels Attempt to Scupper Soviet European State Traitorous Irish Rebels Attempt to Scupper Soviet European State

BRUSSELS - Belgium - Our supreme unelected elite commanders in Brussels were yesterday left with collectivized egg on their face all because of a traitorous...

Gordon Brown Reduces Gulag Detentions to 42 Years Gordon Brown Reduces Gulag Detentions to 42 Years

LONDON - England - Supreme unelected leader, Comrade Gordon Brown, has today announced that all traitorous terrorists to the Soviet British state will have...

Damien Hirst Self-Portrait Sells for Record £387 Million Damien Hirst Self-Portrait Sells for Record £387 Million

LONDON - England - Sotheby's has sold a Damien Hirst original self portrait for a record amount today.

New London Taxi Cabs Unveiled New London Taxi Cabs Unveiled

LONDON - England - With the price of fuel reaching heady heights, enterprising London cabbies have come up with an ingenious way of beating the global diesel...




It's OK 'Keep Panic Buying Petrol' Brown Urges It's OK 'Keep Panic Buying Petrol' Brown Urges

LONDON - England - Unelected Comrade and supreme leader of the British Soviet state, Gordon Brown, has today urged proles to keep panic buying petrol so that...

Barack Hussein Obama Vows to Wage Jihad on Christian American Doubters Barack Hussein Obama Vows to Wage Jihad on Christian American Doubters

WASHINGTON DC - USA - Barack Obama vows to fight prejudice against Islamic values and culture in the United States. In a historic address to his supporters he...

Paris Hilton Sawn in Half Paris Hilton Sawn in Half

LAS VEGAS - Paris Hilton was chopped in half over the weekend but unfortunately lived to tell the tale.

Britain's Got Stabbing Britain's Got Stabbing

LONDON - England - Simon Scowell, Piers Moron and some dozy bint pick a winner out of the talented British knife-wielding thugs on display.












Hillary Hoping for Osama Assassination Hillary Hoping for Osama Assassination

WASHINGTON DC - USA - Hillary Clinton is hoping on the assassination of the well known terrorist Osama. Speaking to Fox News she told the network why she is...

Amy Winehouse Inducted into 'Hardcore Rehab' with Israeli Miracle Doctor Amy Winehouse Inducted into 'Hardcore Rehab' with Israeli Miracle Doctor

KIRYAT MALACHI - Israel - In a last ditch effort to get herself cleaned up from her addictions, troubled celebrity Amy Winehouse is reportedly set to attempt...

Jade Goody to Replace Carol Vorderman on Countdown Jade Goody to Replace Carol Vorderman on Countdown

MANCHESTER - England - Carol Vorderman the brainy assistant on the long standing daytime TV program, Countdown, will be replaced by Celebrity Big Brother...

Human-Animal Hybrids Roaming Britain's Streets Today Human-Animal Hybrids Roaming Britain's Streets Today

MANCHESTER - England - Scientists have discovered human-animal hybrids which were specifically created for medical experimentation somehow roaming the streets...



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